Ghosts of the Past
by gambit217
Summary: Awakening story line. After Kallian Cousland chose to spare Loghain, Alistair left her to defeat the blight on her own. Three years later rumors of a someone she thought to be long gone surface, along with a new form of darkspawn. Turns out ending the blight was only the beginning. Ch update: I caught fire.
1. Prologue

_I am hoping to make this a fairly long story. I don't know about the rest of you but when Alistair left after the landsmeet I was  
very curious to what would happen if these characters met up again some years later.  
Not seeing a lot of stories with this base i decided to give it a try. enjoy!_

**_REVISED_**: _fixed a bit of grammar and punctuation errors, and added a good deal more so i think it maybe worth it to reread it. thanks to my beta **MidnightObsession!**_

**Spoiler alert for Awakening!**

**disclaimer: Bioware owns all but my characters name and dogs name.  
**

She could do nothing to stop him from leaving. She could only stare in disbelief as he walked toward the end of the Landsmeet Hall. Every inch he moved slowed her heart beat. The click of his armored heels reverberated off of the stone walls, he slowed to a crawl. He paused at the door, silencing the rumbling whispers. He looked back at her, his hazel eye's screaming for her to stop him. Waiting but a moment for her to say something, anything, but she could not find the words. His shoulder's visibly sank as he turned.

"If this is to be your choice, then I shall take my leave. Do not expect to see me again." Alistair took one last glance over his shoulder "goodbye, Kali."

Every breath became a chore, a stabbing pain in her lungs with every inhale. It was as if someone placed a rock upon her chest. She chewed the inside of her lip in an attempt to hold back the objections in her mind. Would her decision be worth it?

Kallian realized that her compassion had gotten the better of her. She closed her eye's revisiting that night at camp, Wynne had approached her, her face painted with concern. The mage's words rang in her ears "Which shall you choose, love or duty?" At the time she had just shaken her head and laughed, foolish enough to think it would never come to that. The time was now, and she had made her decision.

She opened her eye's with a gasp, just in time to view the great oak doors close. The hall erupted with whispers, her mouth hung open. Her eye's began to focus, standing in front of her was fellow Grey Warden Riordan and Loghain Mac Tir, the treacherous snake whom she had just saved from execution. At a price. They both stood with puzzled looks upon their faces. Riordan's mouth moved as if he was speaking but no words reached her ears.

She resisted the urge to fall to the floor, her eye's burning trying holding back the tears. It was no secret in the court that she and Alistair had become close in their time together.

No one knew that it had become love.

They had only met months before, Kallian barely escaped the fall of her castle at the hand or Arl Howe. The supposed ed best friend of her father Teyrn Bryce Cousland. It was a political plot for him to gain more control. Kallian had viewed first hand the death of everyone she cared for, for more land. Duncan the Commander of the Grey had come to their estate in hopes of recruiting one of their knights, to join his order.

Grey Wardens were warriors of fairy tales, or so she thought. Before Duncan Kallian had been told stories of them riding griffins to defeat the great dragons which embodied the old gods. They were the countries only hope for defeating the darkspawn hordes in the blight. They only recruited the best of the best.

Duncan had pulled her from the carnage and taken her to the city of Ostagar. There she had met King Calian and his chief adviser Teyrn Loghain Mac Tir. They were to on the eve of battle with the Darkspawn. Duncan suggested she take part of the joining, in which one drinks the blood of the darkspawn, ingesting it's taint in hopes of becoming immune to it. Many did not survive it, dying on the spot or becoming ghouls themselves.

It was here she met Alistair.

"You know one good thing about the blight? How it's brings people together". He smirked when she approached him.

She suppressed a laugh. It was the first smile she released in days. She survived the joining with merely a head ache. Duncan instructed them that they were to light a beacon. It was to inform Loghain's troops when to charge. They performed their part.

It was on this battle field, Loghain betrayed his king. Leaving him to die, along with Duncan and all the other Wardens. Kallian and Alistair were the only ones left.

They took to the road, bent on revenge. This is where they became close. He entrusted her with a secret seldom knew. He was the bastard son of King Maric, making Calian his half brother. His mother died in childbirth and he was sent to live with an uncle. Alistair has felt nothing but guilt over her death since childhood. That was until he met Kali.

Riordan's voice sounded as if it was miles away. He reached out to her, gingerly placing a hand upon her shoulder. Pulling her from this catatonic state.

"Kallian, we have little time. We must perform the joining."

She looked up, realizing that she was still in a room full of nobles, all of whom were staring in her direction. She just wanted to run, to hide in the chambers and never to resurface. Her face grew hot with embarrassment, she pushed her curly brown hair behind her ears. Unable to form the words she nodded.

Loghain Mac Tir had survived drinking the tainted blood of the darkspawn only to regain the title of hero he had so briefly lost. This time he was not known for driving out the invading Orelisians with the late King Maric all those years ago, this time he was the hero of Ferelden.

With a swift swing of his sword, it was ended. Kallian had just plunged her blade into the chest of a darkspawn, it hissed through it's rotted teeth before falling to the ground. She quickly corrected her pose, bracing for another attack. When no immediate danger presented it self she craned her neck, looking for a sign of Loghain. She turned a corner to hear a loud war cry, rushing forth she saw him charging the arch demon. It stood wounded and weak. He knew which ever Warden took the final blow, would perish along with the dragon. Kallian attempted to run to him, but it was to late. A flash of white light and a push of air knocked her to the ground. She tore at her breast plate to catch her breath.

Once the bright white light had faded Kallian stood able to see the great dragon lay headless, next to it was the body of Loghain. Even though he had caused so much pain over the past months, Kallian still shed a tear for the fallen solider.

With their arch demon dead, darkspawn frenzied, fleeing the cities and rushing back to the underground deep roads.

King Calian's widow, Queen Anora commissioned a statue in honor of her father. It was erected in the capital city of Denerim and many visited to pay homage to the hero of Ferelden.

The queen also put forth a request for Kallian stay in Denerim as her chancellor, she graciously accepted. Though her responsibility to the grey beckoned her away. They needed to rebuild, appointing her the youngest Warden Commander at age 23. Recruiting required her to travel frequently, every town they passed through she thought she saw his face. With time as her healer, Kallian Cousland slowly suppressed her pain. After months of denial she had finally accepted it.

He was never coming back.

That thought was as bad as him leaving in the first place. Kallian knew that she had to move her life forward. She acknowledged that her standards for love were that of fairy tales. After two years of sulking and constant badgering from her brother Fergus she accepted a dinner invitation with the one man left in Ferelden who did not fear her or her status.

Teagan Guerrin had brought a light back into Kallian's life that she had thought long lost. They had met years earlier when he requested Alistair's help in regaining his village. He was 15 years her senior, worry lines had made it permanently on his face, though now there was little to worry about. His eye's still rang with youth. His brother Arl Eamon, Alistair's uncle, approved greatly of this match.

Teagan was kind and compassionate, they reminded each other of happier times before the Blight. She found herself reluctant at the start, though his patience persevered.

Every night he came by her brothers estate in Highever around dusk and they walked the garden together, talking about what ever came to mind. She began to care for him deeply and did not resist when he intertwined his hand in hers as they walked one evening. The warmth of his hand comforted her, she even allowed herself to really laugh. Upon departure Teagan stroked her cheek before he placed a light kiss upon it, his eye's lite up with a grin as her cheeks turned a crimson red. It was not long after that night when he pulled her aside after supper.

He tugged her by the hand into the larder, gently closing the large oak door behind him. He turned to her with a flustered look upon his face, and his deep blue eyes darted between Kallian and the larder as though he could not find a focal point. He ran his hand through his hair. It's light brown shade was now speckled with gray.

"May I speak freely, my lady?" He stood wringing his hands.

"Teagan, I thought we were past the formalities of court." She smiled, unable to believe that Teagan was questioning free speech after stealing her away into the darkened larder'.

"I…well…we are, it's just… what I wish to speak with you about...Well it requires a bit of formal etiquette on my part," he stammered.

"Well what is it then?" Her tone grew concerned. Teagan was never one to be this nervous.

"I wish to ask for your hand." He finally blurted out, taking a step forward pulling her hand to his chest.

"I wish for you to become my wife."

Kallian stared at him in shock. "I…" She started to speak but her smile grew too wide for words to come out. Teagan had not noticed her ecstatic grin and continued to fidget with her fingers.

Her heart wanted to explode, but as she opened her mouth to respond Teagan continued.

"I understand that you were quite upset when Alistair left and that you cared for him greatly, and I also understand you could probably never care for me in such a manner. But I was just hoping that given time and an opportunity…" Kallian covered his mouth with her hand trying to not laugh at his ramblings.

"Yes!"

"Really?" He finally met her gaze.

"Teagan, it is true that I cared for Alistair, but it is also true that I care deeply for you and you are mistaken in thinking that I wouldn't. It would be my honor to become your wife."

Teagan swept her up in his arms and spun her around as she laughed joyfully. When he finally placed her back upon her feet, he tilted her face to his, grazing a brown lock of hair out of her face. His gaze wandered to her lips. She moved forward and experienced her firstpassionate kiss in years. It was bliss.

After that Life became a whirlwind. They inhabited Arl Howe's castle, claiming it for the Wardens.

Leliana a bard she had picked up on the road, who was quickly becoming her closest friend, followed her around the castle constantly now. Her fiery red hair unkempt chattering about roses bringing out the green in Kallian's eyes, and how wearing white might make her look ghostly with her pale complexion.

Kallian mostly just laughed, nodding at whatever she said.

The task of rebuilding the Grey was at hand. Soliders poured into the halls of Vigils Keep from every city in the country, eager to prove their worthiness to the new commander. Kallians mind swam in so many circles, she did not notice the rumor that rolled into her estate as a fog. Soldiers and scouts spoke in hushed tones in the corridors. Of a man drunkenly exclaiming to be a former warden, and prince has returned.

**A/N: So that's the beginning. REVIEW PLEASE, tell me what you like, dont like, want to see more/less of. I find it extremely helpful. I hope this can become a popular story, and really hope you guys continue to read it.**


	2. Rumors

_I know I have a bit of trouble with grammar and punctuation and am looking for beta readers to help with it.  
Sorry for such a sort chapter, I'm just thinking a mile a minute about what i'm going to do with this story  
and this does happen to be one of the necessary but boring ones _

**awakening spoliers and i do not own anything but my characters name **

Chapter One

"I still do not understand why this concerns me," Kallian mumbled, continuing to flip through the damage report in front of her. "Let the drunkards have their glory, I care not."

"That was my original thought as well my lady," her Seneschal stood motionless on the other side of her desk, "but then this last bit caught my attention."

"Varel, I really have no patience for guessing games." She replied, setting down the paper in order to rub her eyes wearily. Her chocolate waves lay limp and lifeless atop her head, she held her hands there for a moment. No matter how many times she bathed, no matter how hot the water the smell of smoke still seeped into her skin. With her eyes closed the red glow of the flames stood vibrant in her mind. Her mind flashed back to three night's previous.

After a brief consort with Queen Anora, they returned to the keep to an unsettling sight.

As they walked the long dusty road from Denerim to Vigil's Keep, Leliana hopped merrily along side of her. "Weren't the Queens shoes to die for?" a smile seemed cemented to her face. Kallian nodded absently, her focus still on the disturbing news she had received during her consort.

Anora was slumped over in her throne when Kallian had entered the hall. Her foot steps echoed through the great halls, it was dimly light by a hearth in the corner, and the Queen was engulfed by the large dais. The golden tapestry hung a dull yellow, and Anora's mage rushed forward to announce Kallians arrival. She wore her purple robes with red piping, and nodded sluggishly as the enchanter whispered feverishly in her ear. Kallian reached the bottom of the dais, and took a bow, lowering her head enough for the Queen straighten herself out. Her blonde hair was pulled into a quick bun, stray hairs covered her forehead. "Commander," she nodded, "please excuse my appearance, the last few days have been...trying."

She retook her seat on the edge of her throne, smoothing her skirt she explained that darkspawn had resurfaced. Only this time they traveled in small groups, attacking villages at random and without warning. Many were being slaughtered for little gain, upon observation, looting was not taking place. Rather it seemed as if they were searching for something, what though Anora could not fathom. Her voice was ragged and tired as she spoke. She rose up and took Kallians hands, "Please, I speak with the utmost urgency-I don't know what to do." Queen Anoras gaze pleaded locking on to Kallians.

Kallian stopped dead in her tracks, an all to familiar smelll crossed her nostrils. She looked up, gawking as smoke billowed from the keep, from her home. With a gasp she broke out into a sprint, not looking to see if any of her company was following. _Oh Maker, please not again _she thought as rage whipped through her body. Unsheathing her dragonbone sword, she came across the body of a young solider. He came from Lothering and was barely of age, eager as the rest to prove himself worthy. Kallian squatted down, carefully closing his eyes. Muttering a prayer under her breath she stood. Her body tingled as she spotted the orge bounding toward her. Towering over her, it's muzzle dripped with blood.

The leather of the hilt of her blade cracked as her grip tightened. With a brief look the dead solider, she raged forward, a loud war cry escaping her lungs.

The battle was a blur of blades and blood, they had made it the top level of the keep, to find Varel with a dagger to his neck. A heavily armored Darkspawn stepped in front of him, seeming as though it's fanged mouth wore a smile. It introduced itself as "The Withered", speaking of the end of the Grey, she could not help but to drive her sword through it's gut. Standing over it's writhing corpse she shook, tears streamed down her face as she turned and observed the second falling of her home. She watched in horror as flames engulfed the huts in the courtyard, bodies of soliders and darkspawn a like littered the grounds. Not a week before she had been laughing with these men in the dining hall, their faces flashed through her mind as she looked over the stone ledge.

Following the assault, taking inventory of the damage and the dead had consumed much of her time. She scoured over the papers, many were still unaccounted for_. Could they have been taken? _she though biting her lip. The Darkspawn were slash and burn sort of creatures. Kallian had spent the last four years of her life obsessing over them, trying to learn every detail. But taking prisoners, this was completely new.

Her bodies was bruised and broken, though Anders had healed her broken rib, it still released a dull ache from time to time. Then, even when she found a spare moment to close her eyes all she could envision is the withered, and wonder his masters identity.

Varel cleared his throat; obviously annoyed with her glazed expression.

"Well this _drunk _is not only claiming to be a former Grey Warden, but a prince as well, I did not wish to say anything till I had more evidence but our scouts report that he seems to match the description you put out three years ago. " As he spoke, the seneschal pulled a bit of rolled up parchment from his waist.

"You are sure?" She snatched the report out of his hand.

"Quite sure, Commander," he replied. "He was last seen in the city of Amaranthine."

Kallian stood quickly, sheathing her dagger. "Where are Anders and Nathaniel? I wish to leave immediately."

"They are in the main hall, but Commander- what should I tell Master Guerrin when he arrives?" Varel asked arching his eyebrow as she pulled on her gloves.

"Teagan is not due for another week. Amaranthine is only a day's walk away and I will be back to greet him."

She smiled sweetly, attempting to skirt his suspicions.

Varel moved to interject but she was already out the door and moving down the corridor. Struggling with the clasp on her breast plate, she entered the main hall.

"Our fearless leader approaches," Anders laughed, "tell me, how can one suppress various hoards of darkspawn but be unable to manage a bit of armor?" In answer, Kallian feigned a laugh, finally snapping it into place.

She had found the blonde mage on the night of the attack, he was in the process of being dragged back to the circle for the 9th time. Apparently he was very good at escaping, not so good at staying that way.

"Anders, find Nathanial and meet me in the stables. We must make our way to Amaranthine."

"Aye aye captain," Anders called after her as she began to walk off. In his few days as her companion he quickly learned that questioning the commander was, as he had once so gracefully put,_ "bad mojo"_.

Kallian opened the great oak doors of the hall, nearly smashing the panel of wood into a young soldier. He quickly corrected himself, straightening his armor. "Parcel for you, my lady." He attempted not to sound shaken.

She took the letter with an internal groan, trying to halt her inner train of thought: _I really wish these nobles could figure out their own land debates for once._

Flipping the letter over she noticed the Warden seal, and trying not to seem overeager, she opened the letter. The writing was rushed, messy and written with an unfamiliar hand:

_'Warden Commander,_

_I have heard of your troubles at the keep and I may know the root of it.  
Send word if you wish for us to correspond further.  
Also, I hear my son has recently returned and I wish to speak with him.  
I eagerly await your reply._

_F' _

"When did this arrive?" Kallian asked, rereading the letter.

"Just this morning via messenger ma'am, he awaits your response."

Kallian continued to walk and the solider followed, struggling to keep up. She bit her lip, considering her next move. This was a letter from another Warden but who could it be? And who was their son?

Suddenly, it dawned on her: '_my son has recently returned'. _Kallian slowed her steps down the stairs and turned back to the solider. His helmet fell over his eye's, he adjusted it with a blush.

"What is your message, my lady?" He asked.

"Tell him to inform his master that I will be in the City of Amaranthine, and that they should be able to locate me there."

"Right away Commander," he nodded and ran back toward the hall. Splashing through mud puddles as he ran.

After a brief walk across the courtyard Kallian reached the stables in time to overhear the end of a squabble between Anders and Nathaniel; this had become a routine experience. Anders was an apostate who spoke his mind with no mental filter and she had begun to enjoy having him around.

"I hope you have a point, Anders." Nathaniel grumbled, pulling his dark hair back

"It's like you're a mage! If there were more Howes, they'd lock all of you up in a tower to protect everyone else!" He exclaimed. Tying his pack around his mount.

"A thrilling analogy." Nathaniel turned back to his horse as Kallian entered into sight, stifling a giggle before speaking.

"We must make haste gentlemen; our itinerary just became a bit more complicated".


	3. Incorrigible

_A good bit longer chapter, influence from awakening  
as well as surprise visit from a character from David Gaiders book "The calling"  
i hope you enjoy it!_

_This is all revised and re-edited thanks to the help of **MidnightObsession! **_

_Chapter three should be up soon!_

**_Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my characters name _**

Chapter Two

Kallian sighed as she caught sight of Amaranthine; she had been here several times with her parents as a child though it has been years since her last visit.

The Blight had clearly taken its toll upon the coastal city: the high walls surrounding it were cracked and dulled, and the trees stood barren, just as logs stuck up right in the ground. Refugees were camped outside, huddling around fires for warmth as soldiers stood guard, monitoring visitors and breaking up fights over food or shelter. In a back corner Kallian spotted some men, shrinking into the shadows as she passed.

"This city once sparkled." Nathaniel mumbled under his breath.

It had been a few days since she had decided to spare his life in the dungeon of the keep, yet despite this reprieve he still constantly found things to complain about. He claimed upon capture that he was there to kill her, though after short consideration he just wanted his families belongings. She had to admire his honesty, and the fact to took four wardens to capture him. Much to Nathaniel's displeasure, she enacted the right of conscription, deciding if he wants to redeem his family name. He would have to work for it. Kallian felt pity for the man- he had taken no part in his father's treachery, so she did not treat him as such. They had met on occasion as children, pushed together by their fathers, but rarely did he judge her fit enough to be a playmate let alone a friend. She ignored his words and walked past the guards into the city. They bowed their heads, none dared to speak against her entrance.

"Ah, can you smell the freedom?" Anders stretched his arms into the air, smiling sarcastically. The mage's demeanor had taken a new light since being outside, he enjoyed the world as a child would. Marveling at every freedom all these villagers take fore granted

"Which tavern did Varel say he was last seen in?" Kallian asked, looking around. She shrugged in her armor, it was custom made by Wade in Denerim, now it was too big and hung off her.

Nathaniel pulled a scrap of paper out of his pocket "The Crown and the Lion. The note also mentions that we should ask after a man named Kristoff whilst we are here."

Kallian nodded, after a few failed attempts at directions, they found the tavern. It was nothing remarkable, a wooden door on the side of a building, a large sign hung over the door with a lion on it. There were already many people entering the tavern, Kallian sighed as she stepped toward the door.

Before she could open the door Nathaniel grabbed her arm. "Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"What do you mean?" She challenged, arching her brow.

"What I mean is…if he wanted to be found don't you think he would've come back himself?"

"But he did come back."

"I meant to you," he snapped. His words stung, though she could tell they were not meant to.

"I know what you meant," she said, jerking her arm out of his grasp, "but if this is who I think it is…he made a commitment to Ferelden just as we did, a commitment he does not take lightly."

"But Comm…"

Kallian interjected, "and if this is all a farce, well we have other business to attend to here anyway so no time will be wasted," she continued, opening the door.

It was rowdy upon entrance with drunken fighting and laughter. She looked around, trying to see the familiar face as the bar fell silent. Kallian pushed her way through the gawking eyes and whispers to the bartender, a stern looking old man wiping down glasses. He looked up with a smile.

"You sure know how to calm a room," he chuckled, "should have you come around closer to closing time. What can I do for ya stranger?"

"We're looking for a man fitting this description." She placed the description in front of him and watched as his eyes slowly took in the words.

"Aye, he's stayin' here alright." He lifted his gaze toward her. "I'd go ask the bar maid about it though, she tends to get more acquainted with our customers- has more tolerance for people I guess."

"Thank you," she nodded in gratitude, sliding a few silvers his way.

The pub had begun to clear out a bit making walking a great deal easier than it had been on their initial entrance. It also decreased the stench musk and body odor, for which Kallian was equally as grateful for.

They found the bar maid on the upper plateau closer to the rooms. "Wet your whistle stranger?" she asked, forcing Kallian to speak quickly in order to cut off Anders from whatever offensive joke he had thought up.

"The bartender told us you would know where we could find this man," she explained, relaying his description.

"Ah yes he left this morning, said he had supplies to collect and to expect him back around dusk," she smiled, "pardon me ma'am but is your name Kallian?"

"It depends on whose asking." Her voice wavered; a few days ago they had halted a plot to have her killed so Kallian had become a bit more guarded about whom she revealed her identity to.

"I mean no offence my lady…this came for you shortly before you arrived." She blushed, handing Kallian a scrap of paper.

"Did you see the messenger?"

"No ma'am, 'twas just a local boy paid to deliver it," she muttered avoiding eye contact.

It was the same rushed scribble from the other note:

_'Meet me upon the city walls to the north. Come alone. – F'_

Kallian placed a silver in the girl's palm. "Thank you my lady," she stammered, taking the hint and scurrying off. Kallian stared at the note silently for a moment until Anders broke her concentration.

"So… as much fun as it is to just stand here all sober and such, what is your grand plan?"

"I need you two to stay here and keep an eye out for _him_, and also ask around about Kristoff and see if you can find out just where he went."

"And you will be doing what exactly?" Nathanial grumbled, crossing his arms.

Kallian folded the paper and placed it in her pouch, "I have other matters to attend to."

He opened his mouth as if he was about to object.

"Nathaniel please, I will return shortly so just do as I ask." Kallian pulled up her hood as he glared at her.

"Right, a reconnaissance mission it is," Anders laughed rubbing his hands together, "I believe the bar would be a good place to start don't you?" He pulled a helpless Nathanial down the stairs and Kallian exited the bar.

It was just before dusk when Kallian walked the length of the wall toward the designated meeting spot. They were to meet on top of the city at one of the great lookout points of Amaranthine, in the distance she could spot a dark figure. She became overly aware of her surroundings as she approached the mysterious cloaked figure. Kallian pulled down her hood and felt the cool air sweep through her hair—she stopped cautiously, grasping the hilt of her dagger.

"I can assure you Warden that will not be necessary," a female voice chimed out, "I mean you no harm, in fact we are working toward a similar goal."

"Who are you?" Kallian demanded, keeping her posture guarded.

"I am an old friend of Duncan's." Her Orlesian accent was thick and she kept her back to Kallian.

"Oh? Then what is your name?" She asked, wrapping her fingers tighter around her dagger.

"You ask many pointless questions Commander, but if it helps to put you at ease then I am Fiona." She replied. Fiona looked over her shoulder, her hood blocked off most of her face.

Kallian let her hand loosen from her dagger and stood up a little straighter, "and what information do you have that would interest me?"

"I have heard of the attack on Vigil's Keep, and I believe it was the work of a powerful darkspawn emissary who calls himself _the Architect." _Fiona turned, keeping her hood up so that Kalian could only make out her lips as she spoke. "I have been searching for him for the past twenty years and this is the closest I have gotten in some time now".

"Twenty years?"

"Yes," Fiona stepped forward, "The last I physically saw of him was in the Deep Roads when I was a young Warden like you, travelling with Duncan and King Maric. We lost several good Wardens during that pursuit and I fully intend to bring him to justice."

"What's been stopping you?"

"I have come close on many occasions but he is more elusive than he would originally seem. Every lead I had ended with a dead end," she said, "and alas, time is a foe not even a Warden can slay. The nightmares have begun again. My calling is near"

Kallian recalled that night in front of the fire at camp when Alistair had told her of those side effects:  
_"The taint will eventually take you. Duncan says that when the nightmares return your time is coming; it is believed that the honorable thing to do is to return to Orzammar, to the Deep Roads, and die in a final glorious battle." _

"So it is my hope that by giving the Commander of the Grey Wardens this information you can continue on my quest," she smiled, "so I may begin my rite of passage on to the next life."

"Fiona I…" Kallian started to say.

"Dear girl, do you think these attacks are _random_? They are anything but. A plan seems to be in motion; a plan that if you do not stop will change the face of Ferelden forever." Her calm, cool voice made the dire situation sound as if it was small talk.

Kallian nodded in understanding, trying to get a better grasp of what her face looked like beneath the heavy wool cloak she wore. "Fiona, you spoke of a son?"

"I was rather hoping you would have pieced that together already."

"I believe I have, but I'm just wondering," Kallian paused, shifting her weight awkwardly, "why lie to him, why send him away?"

Fiona took a step closer into the light, removing her cloak- they stood in silence for a moment as Kallian examined her frail figure, looking from her feet, to her short gray speckled hair, to her ears.

"You are an elf?" She masked her surprise.

"An elven mage to be exact," Fiona grimaced and replaced her cloak, "What sort of life could I have given to the son of a king? He appeared to be fully human as cross breed children do. So I did what i thought was best and gave him to Maric making him promise Alistair would have no knowledge of his true mother. Also requesting he grow up away from court, I wanted him to have a normal life. Duncan promised me to keep an eye out for him." Her frown deepened at the mention of Duncan, no doubt his death hit her hard as well.

"I cannot say I do not regret what I have done, only show remorse for my actions. Do not take it as I did not love my son, it just seemed...better, In the rare chance a Grey Warden produces a child..."

She paused for a moment, her dark eyes moved as though searching through her mind. "Maric had asked me to stay, in Denerim with him, but what would that make me? his mistress? would I live in the alienage and he would send us coin to keep me quiet?...I did care for Maric, a good deal more than he knew. But a life in a cage, no manner of how lavish it was, is still a cage."

Fiona stepped forward, clasping Kallians hands tightly. "Without the Wardens, I was nothing, so i made my choice. One that is not to far from the choice you have made". She released Kallian's hands, letting them just drop to her side. Tears welled in Fiona's eyes, she wiped them quickly taking a step back.

Kallian remained silent for a moment. Everything she said made sense, again Wynne's words rang in her ears. _"The task of a Warden is to be unselfish, and love is ultimately selfish, so when the time comes which shall you choose? Love or duty?"_  
"And now dear girl, I bid you farewell," Fiona placed her hand upon Kallian's shoulder, "may we meet in another life." She partially turned away before handing the Commander an envelope. "Make sure he gets this. I wish for him to know the truth." All Kallian could do was nod and watch as Fiona proceeded to disappear into the night.


	4. Tornado meets a volcano

_Finally chapter 3!  
Sorry it took so long! very busy time for me at work and school._

_Thanks to my beta **MidnightObsession!**_

_Chapter 4 is in the works! thanks to all those who favorited my story and reviewed! you keep my writing!  
__Please review!_

**_Bioware owns all but my characters name. _**

**Chapter Three**

Kallian stood atop the city walls, stalling while the cool night air licked at her nose as she stared down at the refugee camp. She watched the light from the fires dance and the swells of smoke rise into the air. She felt increasingly uncomfortable with the information she now possessed; not so much the information on the Architect but rather the information about the royal cover up. Her thoughts were interrupted by the faint noise of laughter rising from below and the sound of lutes drifting past her ears.

"_How could something so beautiful exist in a place with so much despair and ugliness?"_

She frowned, the memory she had once found so dear was now filled with pain. Kallian thumbed the envelope in her pocket and sighed. She had been mulling over thoughts of Teagan, was it truly fair to marry him? The probability of producing him an heir was low, though not impossible, and she was tainted. Her clock was ticking, and there was nothing she could do about it.

_"With out the Wardens, I am nothing"._

Fiona became the voice of reason in Kallian's head, as long as she remained a Warden, duty was first. She did not know how to process these thoughts, they rang through her mind like annoying bees in her skull. As much as she cared for Teagan, he deserved a woman who wanted to be a wife, not a lonely solider.

The sun had gone down, and she could no longer avoid reality.

Kallian had not realized just how long she had actually been standing upon the wall and the city seemed deserted as she made her way back to the tavern. Guards stood at almost every corner, but even with that bandits still exchanged goods in the back alleys. Moving further from the lights of the torches as she passed them by, Kallian approached the front of the Crown and Lion only to be met by a group of men. The smell of ale on their breath was overwhelming; she was attempting to push past them when one grabbed her wrist. "Eeeyy girlie, what's your hurry?" He slurred.

"You will let go of me if you value your safety," she growled trying to wrench her wrist away as his grip tightened.

"Ya hear that boys?" He laughed. "We got us a fighter," the man pulled her closer, sliding his arm around her waist, "c'mon love, gives us a kiss." He shoved his face towards hers. Kallian felt a little joy about his choice- '_can't say I didn't warn him'__. _ She slammed her forehead into the bridge of his nose, causing him to stumble backward, his hands flying to his face as blood spurted down his shirt.

"You little bitch!" He roared through his hands, taking a step toward her. With dodge to the left and a swipe of her leg, Kallian had pinned him to the ground in a matter of seconds, smiling as his friends frantically backed away.

"W-w-who are you?" A man finally stuttered.

"Do you not recognize the hero of Ferelden when you see her?" A voice from behind Kallian caused her to jump, and the man she held under her foot was able to scurry away. She turned around quickly to meet the gaze of a familiar set of eyes. "I was wondering how long it would take before you found me."

The smile on her face instantly vanished; she pushed her long brown hair behind her ears, and straightened her armor. "Alistair." She finally gasped, trying to catch her breath.

"Trouble really does seem to find _you_ doesn't it?" He narrowed his eyes- there was no sense of friendliness to his voice. His hands moved up to remove his hood: his once golden hair was shaggy and lifeless atop his head and a light beard dusted the lower half of his face. He seemed to stand taller now as well, as though he had more confidence than before. She looked up and met his gaze, those eyes, they could stare as if he was looking right through her.

Kallian finally broke her train of thought and spoke. "I…I need to speak with you." She shook her head to clear her mind.

"Why would I want to do that?" He sneered, pulling a pipe out of his pack and loading it with tobacco.

"Alistair," Kallian pleaded, stepping toward him. She was about to put her hand on his shoulder when he replied.

"Fine, but no touching, and we do it inside. If I am to talk to you I will need a drink."

"Okay." Kallian agreed backing up. He opened the door for her, gesturing her inside.

"Aaayyy, Boss lady!" Anders giggled from the corner booth, waving her over. "We couldn't find him".

Kallian stomped over to his table pulling a woman away from his side. "Hey!" he protested.

"Just what do you think you're doing?" She snapped. "Where is Nathaniel?"

"He's on a reconnaissance mission looking for that fellow of yours- and blending in with the locals." He slurred, attempting a whisper; she could smell the brew on his breath. Kallian turned around to see Nathaniel in an in-depth conversation with the bar maid; the plump woman sat next to him giggling and blushing as he stroked her cheek.

Kallian clenched her fists; in a fury she grabbed Anders by his robes and Nathaniel by his arm, throwing them toward the room they had rented for the night. "Room now!" She spat. "I will deal with you later". Neither argued, just pouted their lips like scolded children, stomping off to their room. She turned back around to see Alistair settling himself at a table near the hearth, removing his cloak and bringing a pint of ale to his lips. This could not be real. She moved through the crowd and sat herself across from him; he still refused to meet her gaze.

"So, what does the Commander of the Grey want with me?" He asked his face still as stone as he lit his pipe.

"Alistair," she winced at his name, "it doesn't need to be like this."

"That is not what you wanted to talk about I hope." He said. "You have my attention Kali, so speak."

She stared blankly at him- he was the only one who called her by that name, and it had caught her off guard. He looked at her and then back down at the table; she could tell he was thinking the same. He was tracing the outline of his glass with his finger when she finally broke the silence.

"There is a rumor…" She started.

"Ah yes, you overindulge in Highever once and it's all the country can talk about for a month." Alistair released a crooked smile with no real joy behind it.

"You've been here a month?" Kallian felt bewildered.

"In a manner of speaking," he exhaled a cloud of tobacco smoke, "but now we're on the subject of rumors, I have heard word of your recent engagement- to Bann Teagan nonetheless; impressive Kali." He leaned back in his chair, a smug expression on his face as he took another puff from his pipe. "Don't think I didn't see the spark in his eyes when we were fighting the undead in Redcliffe, but I just thought I would win _that_ battle."

"If you do not intend to say anything nice Alistair, I would rather not speak of it. Do not forget which one of us left." She hissed through her teeth.

"It's all a matter of perspective, my dear."

She cringed at the end of his sentence; this was not the Alistair she remembered. This man in front of her was cold and callous and held none of the qualities she had once valued in him. Did her decision really make him hate her that much? She inhaled deeply, suppressing the urge to reach for her dagger.

"I did not come to argue with you," she finally spoke, looking around her, "I need your help." Surprisingly, none of the taverns patrons were staring or muttering choice whispers.

"_You _need _my_ help?" He scoffed. "I find that hard to believe."

"You've no doubt heard of the darkspawn attack upon Vigil's Keep," Kallian leaned in closer, "We lost a lot of Wardens to that attack, so I need as much help as I can get." She glanced into the hearth, watching the flames dance just as she had done on top of the wall. "They took them prisoner."

Alistair's eyes widened but his face stayed the same; she could tell he was surprised but wanted to conceal it from her.

"I ended my involvement with Grey Warden matters when I left that hall, why is it my concern now?"

She felt the anger bubble in her gut, clenching her fists she glared at him.

"Alistair you had a responsibility-"

"You had a responsibility- to Duncan and Cailan! But instead, you let the man who betrayed them become one of us!" He raised his voice and slammed his pipe onto the table; she could see the fury in his eyes as the tobacco embers littered the floor.

"And now he lies dead: justice paid." She clenched her fists so tight her knuckles turned white.

"You call that justice?" He growled.

"At least I made a choice; I didn't run from my responsibilities like a child!" Kallian stood up, not caring who heard her.

"Oh that's a first, from what I've heard you're a pro at running from trouble," he yelled, standing up next to her, "You call what happened with Loghain dealing with responsibility? he aided in the fall of your castle, you let the man who had a hand in the death of your parents go free!"

Kallian drew her arm back and hit him across his face- he staggered a few steps back, and then straightened out. He reached up to his jaw, spitting what looked like blood into the fire. She became aware that every set of eyes in the tavern were upon them and she leaned in closer, wanting nothing more than to hit him again. "If you speak of my parents again, I will do more than bruise your jaw." She took another step forward, but Alistair did not move- he just stared back into her eyes. The look gave her nervous chills but her fury moved her forward.

"I am asking for your help, however I will not apologize for decisions I have made for this country," she snarled into his ear, "sleep on it." She pushed him back onto his chair and turned to walk to her room; suddenly, she paused, feeling a lump in her pocket- it was the letter she had received from Fiona. Kallian pulled the envelope from her pocket and tossed it across the table. "Here." She snapped and began walking again.

"Who is this from?" He bellowed after her, grabbing a napkin to clean the dribble of blood from his chin.

"Your mother."


	5. Truth

_New Chapter, I am currently visiting family so I am unsure on when my next update will be.  
My Beta's have gone MIA so this is all me! A bit longer than my normal chapters. I'm hoping to keep this Length a norm..._

_Everyone whose Subscribed and reviewed: Thank you! it keeps me writing! Keep em' coming!_

**_note: bioware owns all etc. _**

Chapter Four

Kallian found it impossible to sleep that night. She lay upon her musky cot, staring at the ceiling counting the cracks in the wood. She mumbled the numbers under her breathe, chasing away the haunting thoughts that plagued her dreams. She couldn't shake Alistair's words out of her head.

_'You let the man who had a hand in the death of your parents go free.'_

She tried hard not to believe it, but the words still burnt into her memory.

Logahin had as much to do with Howe's treachery as Nathaniel, she could not punish him for association, she could not stoop to his level. Kallian felt there was no flaw in her decision, maybe that's how they were similar, Logahin only did what he thought was right.

Alistair's face as he marched out of the Landsmeet Hall flashed past her mind. With a heavy sigh Kallian rubbed her face, holding her hands over her mouth for a moment. Her anger evaporated from her body, turning into an aching sorrow. A rock formed in the pit of her stomach, causing her breath to quicken.

She closed her eyes and continued to count.

Kallian found herself back in Howe's dungeon, standing over his wheezing body. A feeling had taken over her. No longer able to see straight, she let the rage grip her, it threated to take her very being. She found herself unable to look away. Staring at a pitiful man lying on the floor, gasping for air.

She cocked her head, looking at him caused her to see that night all over again. She saw her young nephew Oren and his mother Oriana lying in a pool of their own blood, she saw her father choking for air as her mother cried for her to run. She would not run anymore, this pain ended here. It ended with him.

"Maker spit on you! I…deserved…more," Howe sputtered from the floor, his hands covered a gaping wound in his abdomen. Every word he spoke added to her fury, Kallian gripped the hilt of her sword tighter. The leather cracked slightly under the pressure, the warmth of his blood still fresh upon her hands.

"You deserve… to have your head put on a pike, and for the people of Denerim to spit on you as they pass" She snarled through a clenched jaw. He was barely hanging on, The more he tried to speak the more blood gushed from the wound.

She wanted to make him suffer, the way he made her family suffer, the way he caused her to suffer.

The clink of armored boots approached behind her, a voice sounding as if it were miles away called out to her, "Kali stop".  
She took no notice, Kallian raised her sword, placing the tip first upon his chest, watching as Howe's eyes widened.  
She felt a bit of joy at the sight of his fear his fear, she drew back her sword about to run it through him a second time, when suddenly arms were wrapped around her. They pulled her away from him at an alarming rate. She heard the clang of metal hitting stone as her sword fell to the floor. Alistair was pulling her from the room, nodding for Wynne and Sten to enter it, to heal Howe enough for him to face the court.

"Kali no, Not this way". Alistair's rushed voice whispered in her ear, frantically trying to get a steady grip on her.  
She screamed trying to wrench herself out of his grasp, but every jerk, kick or punch made his grip around her arms tighter.  
"You are not this person, I will not let you be this person", he continued whispering attempting to calm her. She continued to struggle—feeling the hot tears run down her face.

"He has to pay! He has to—"her screams were cut off by loud sobs. Her knees gave out and she sank to the floor, shaking and weak. Alistair kept his arms wrapped around her, stroking her hair as tears ran down her face uncontrollably. All the faces of her kin flashed in her mind at that moment, she knew he was right, they would've never wanted her to become this person. A person who killed just to watch the suffering, to feel the warmth of his blood on her hands. Just to feel some form of closure. She erupted with louder sobs, making another feeble attempt to wrench herself free.  
Alistair did not seem to notice, continuing to stroke her hair and whisper in her ear.  
"He will, I promise you he will, I promise" he repeated, his cheek pressed firmly to her forehead as they sat upon the floor. "I promise you".

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Kallian's eye's snapped open, sitting straight up she looked around the dark room, it was their room again, not a dungeon, no dying man on the floor, just a snoring mage.  
She exhaled slowly, relaxing back into her cot.

Howe had been sentanced to death by Anora after the defeat of the Arch Demon. At his execution Kallian sat with her hand tightly intertwined with Fergus. She had hoped to have Alistair there as well, looking around every so often only to be met by unfamiliar faces.

Kallian had been thankful to Alistair for what he had done, when told Loghain did not have to die, she thought she was returning the favor.

The embers from the hearth glowed, crackling as they extinguished. This room was small, much smaller than her quarters at Vigil's Keep, but it beat a bedroll on the road.  
There were two small cots in the room, one sat but a foot away from her containing a sleeping Nathaniel. Anders lay upon the floor snoring, earlier when she entered the room in a fit of rage, she nearly fell flat on her face over him.

The sky was beginning to grey outside, it wouldn't be long now before dawn, and she should attempt to get some sleep. Kallian flipped on her side with a sigh, facing Nathaniel now she watched his rhythmic breathing—'_1-2-3-4'_.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Light crept into the room through the thin curtains, Ander's groaned drowsily from the floor, "You know…you'd think begin _Hero of Ferelden_ and all would grant us better accommodations".  
Kallian let out a low chuckle keeping her eyes closed when she responded. "I am no hero—and being a warden does not give us the frivolity to waste coin, you will survive".  
"I guess" he whined. "Hey, did you ever find that fellow last night?

Kallian opened her eyes to be met by the same cracked ceiling, the light in the room was faint and grey, it must be just after dawn.

She rubbed her eye's feeling a twinge of pain come from her hand. Kallian pulled her fist in front of her face, observing that it was red around the knuckles but otherwise unscathed. She frowned poking at it with her other hand, she did not regret in the least hitting him, she was just now realizing how it seemed repugnant to their goal.

"Yes, I found him". She sat up in her bed propping herself on the wall "getting him to help is going to be the hard part".  
Anders stood picking up his pack, he crossed the room and sat on the edge of Nathaniel's now empty cot. Kallian straightened up quickly, a wave of anxiety washed over her, "Where is Nathaniel?"

"Something about meeting his sister in the market district, he only just left" He mumbled rummaging through his bag.

She moaned covering her face with her hands, Kallian recalled him making mention of this one the road, and she also recalled telling him time is tight as it is. She got out of bed with a huff, and started assembling her armor, or at least trying to. A knock at the door caused them both to jump, Kallian's stomach flipped as she took a step toward the knob. Anders cleared his throat, motioning for her to calm her hair, which was no doubt in a horribly disheveled state. Raking a hand through her mane, Kallian turned and opened the thin wood door.

Alistair stood on the other side, wearing the same heavy wool cloak from the night before, and the same expression. Without waiting for an invitation he pushed past Kallian inside. She turned furrowing her brow at him, his eyes were baggy, a tell tale sign of a restless night. His face was pale, excluding his lip, which on the left side was spilt and red. She smirked in her mind. She had never wished pain upon him, but after his actions last night he was lucky that's all she did.

"Leave us!" Alistair snapped towards Anders, stopping in front of Kallian, a certain anger rushed over her. Anders craned his neck over Alistair's shoulder. Not breaking her glare with Alistair, she nodded, gesturing Anders out. Alistair paced for a moment in front of her, fumbling the envelope in his hand. He turned several times, as if he were going to speak, but then stopped and continued pacing. Kallian finally feeling fed up cleared her throat.

"Alistair you have no right-". It came out more of a croak, he hardly seemed to notice just held up his hand. He locked his eyes on hers, they were not as fiery as last night, they seemed almost desperate.

"What else do you know?"

"The same as you i assume". She was shocked at his bluntness. She had expected anger or yelling, not this. His face masked a pain, she could understand it without him needing to say anything. He ran his fingers through his unkempt hair with a sigh. "She traveled with your fa-King Maric into the deep roads, attempting to locate another Warden, many of their order was lost on this mission. She traveled with Duncan."

He winced at the name, his posture portrayed him fragile and not the stone creature from last night. Kallian's heart kept skipping beats, this could be the Alistair she remembered.

He continuing to pace. "When did you meet her?"

"Only just last night, before finding you, She sent for me-with information she thought I'd find valuable".

"About the Architect?" He stopped in front of the window, placing his hands upon the sill. Staring out for a moment, he looked as though he was running something through his mind.

"Yes". She kept her answers short, not entirely sure where he was going with this conversation. It made her nervous. "She wished to inform the new Commander before...before she headed to Orzammar".

"Orzammar?" Alistair cocked his head, his eye's searching her face. "The calling?"

Kallian just nodded, confused on if Fiona had not mentioned that bit to him in her letter. His face twisted for a split second, a slight frown dawned, and her heart stopped. It took every fiber of her being not to rush over and hold him, just to make that look go away. It had gone as quickly as if came, replaced by a face that showed no emotion. She did not wish to see this face either.

"My mother a Warden, Everything I grew up believing, the guilt i felt-" he cut himself short. Balling his hands into fists.

"She had good reason to do what she did-you know what she was now, what life could she of given you?" Kallian regretted the words the minute they fell out of her mouth.  
Alistair turned narrowing his eyes. "What kind of life? I slept with the dogs, I was sold to the Chantry by some jealous Orlesian housewife" he stepped closer, she could feel his breath on her face.

"She could have given me _a_ life".

Her position weakened, she wanted to shrink into nothing. She rubbed her arms, chasing away the cold that wasn't there.

"She could have given me a life where none of this pain...it could've been different" he paused.  
These words struck her like a dagger, piercing into her heart. Kallian stood there for a second, focusing on the dust that drifted through the air. She began to mentally count again.  
_'1-2-3-4'  
_Her chest tightened as she opened her mouth to speak, nothing more than a wheeze came out.

Alistair stepped back, looking down at her, he did not speak.

"A life without me?" She finally choked, her eye's burnt as she held back the tears.

Looking up into his hazel eye's, they sat in silence for a moment. It answered her question more than words ever could.

"I will help you. But just note this, I am not doing it for you". His voice wavered. As Alistair turned to leave, Kallian instinctively reached out, snagging his arm in her frail hands.  
"Alistair, I'm sorry about-".

"This isn't something you can just fix Kali, It's not that simple".  
He pulled his arm free and swiftly exited the room.

Kallian stood in the dingy room-keeping her hands held in the air, just staring into the unknown distance, Anders slide back into the room. Seemingly amused by Alistair's perturbed expression he shrugged:  
"Guess it wasn't that hard".


	6. Hope

_AH sorry it's take so long! sever writers block plus work equals very little gets done. But i think I'm past it and tomorrow being my first full day off in a while, I will be spending it writing and  
cleaning so hopefully ch 6 will be out shortly!_

_thanks to my beta **Argos** _

_Thanks to all of you who have reviewed and subscribed to my story, it aided in my guilt to finish this chapter haha.  
keep on reviewing and i hope you enjoy! _

Chapter Five

Kallian chewed the inside of her cheek as she walked the cobblestone road toward the Market District. She kept her gaze straight ahead, searching for Nathaniel's hooked nose, and avoiding Alistair's burning glare. Anders trotted along matching her pace, being outside and not locked in a dark cell was enough to make him smile.

Kallian wished she had that enthusiasm.

It was sunny, though the cold still bit through her armor. Having her long brown hair pulled into a sloppy pony tail made it easier for the wind to turn her cheeks and ears bright red. Kallian felt thankful for the cold, lest Alistair see her blush at his gaze. She allowed herself one quick peek over her shoulder; he met her gaze, causing chills to race up her spine. He cleared his throat looking toward the ground as she quickly turned back.

_'What am I doing? Engaged women do not fawn,' _Kallian did a mental grunt kicking a small rock far ahead of her.

In a flash of memory she was brought back in front of the campfire, long before the Landsmeet.

Alistair stood before her, his brow furrowed. Alistair's hazel eyes locked with Kallian's green, he opened his mouth to speak several times before actually releasing words. Each time he took a deep inhale and shifted his weight awkwardly.

"Here's the thing. Being around you makes me crazy, but I cannot imagine being without you. Not. Ever."

Kallian smiled to herself, it seemed like an eternity ago, yet the memory was still so fresh.

"Whatcha thinking about?" Anders asked coyly from her left.

"Nothing," her smile quickly disappeared. She rubbed her eye's, the exhaustion caused them to sting and remain unfocused. Her normally fair skin was red and blotchy. With the nightmares last night and fighting with Alistair, she was running on empty.

"Didn't look like nothing," he laughed dodging her elbow to the ribs as they entered the market district.

The day was still early, and the market was already buzzing with people. Merchants bellowed out new stock, as others shoved perfumes and cloth into Kallian's face. She smiled politely as she carefully pushed her way through the crowd. Avoiding the pleading eyes on the beggars on the street, guilt spreading through her as she felt her breakfast slosh around her stomach. She had nothing to give, the Wardens were barely hanging on as it was.

Kallian looked around examining the stalls, they seemed barren, the merchants who stood over them looked aggravated and exhausted. Many were not even using stalls, but boxes flipped over to look like a table. Kallian continued to pan the market.

It was then she saw him. He was laughing in front of a grocer's stand with a dark haired woman whose features mimicked his. He was smiling. Kallian felt a sudden wave of regret wash over her body. Nathaniel had asked for her help, and she wrote him off like a chore; how could she ever expect to gain his respect if she would not show him hers. Kallian continued to forge her way through the crowd.

Nathaniel froze up as he caught the sight of the commander approaching, anxiety spread throughout his body, followed by confusion at seeing the smile on her face. His sister who had her back to the market turned to see what terrified her brother. Her face erupted with laughter.

"Kallian Cousland is that you?" the woman exclaimed, her short dark hair framed her face perfectly. She was most definitely a Howe. Before Kallian could really react, she was pulled into a rib crushing hug. Upon release she staggered backward, trying to catch her breath.

"It's me, Delilah Howe, well not Howe anymore but..." She continued to talk at a speed Kallian could not follow. The brief picture of a snotty teenage girl came to mind, one who always turned her nose up at Kallian and Fergus, claiming that. 'Young ladies should not play swords.' Delilah had repeated that mantra various times upon her visits to Highever as a child.

Delilah's face looked as though she was standing on pins and needles, the lines around her eyes widened with her smile. Kallian could tell this woman had changed from the young girl she once was. Her jet black hair and hooked nose were that of Nathaniel's. Long before the treachery of their father, the Howes were close friends of the Couslands. Nathaniel would sit at their estate nose buried in some book, as Delilah was more than delighted to talk with her mother about men in the Teyrn. There was also another son, Thomas, he followed Kallian around day and night.

When they were scarcely fifteen he informed her "I will have your hand someday." Their fathers had been thrilled at this proclamation, Kallian stood in fear. The last she heard Thomas was killed in battle, she bit her lip to hide her frown.

"Engaged to a Bann! How exciting, was this design of Fergus or-"

"I am quite capable in making my own arrangements Delilah" Kallian flinched at hearing the tone of her own voice. It had come out harsher than she had wished.

"What I mean to say is...I hope I can make Teagan as happy as he makes me."

Alistair snorted from behind Kallian, turning to hide a sneer from Delilah. Delilah resisted the urge to ask who the shaggy looking man standing in Kallian's company was, quickly turning her attention back to wedding details.

"Oh your mother would've been so happy; she never thought you'd get mar-"

Kallian felt a sharp twinge in her gut at the mention of her mother. She always complained that Kallian was too boyish, that her knowledge of armor and sword technique would never find her a proper husband. One summer afternoon Fergus was teaching her how to block and he had cut her arm, tears streaming down her face, the nine year old ran to her mother.

"Kallian Cousland, that is no way for a young lady to act". The Teyrna scolded, wrapping a bandage around the wound, her face softened as she finished with a kiss.

Kallian held back the tears that welled up in her eyes, Delilah, taking no notice, continued to speak of previous visits to the Cousland estate. Alistair grunted stepping in front of Kallian, causing a rather perturbed look on Delilah's face.

"We really must be on our way, Commander." He narrowed his eyes toward the Howe's, both of whom returned the glare. Kallian opened her mouth to speak, but the knot that twisted around her throat blocked the words. Nathaniel moved forward moving his gaze toward Kallian's direction.

"I have received news of Kristoff''s location. A map in his room at the tavern indicates he went to investigate the Blackmarshes." Nathaniel crossed his arms behind his back, straightening his stance as he spoke.

Kallian nodded mulling over the thought in her head, "We should make haste then".

They bid Delilah farewell, and made their way out of the market district, only to be cut off by a mousy looking man who introduced himself as Mervis.

"E-e-excuse me for being so blunt, but I desperately need your help." His hands shook and he refused to meet her gaze.

He explained that the trade routes in the Wending Wood were being systematically attacked by Darkspawn. Amaranthine had not received supplies in days, and innocents were being slaughtered.

"We shall make it a priority" Kallian confirmed, placing a gentle hand on the merchant's shoulder.

"Oh thank the Maker, the merchant's guild will be so pleased," The small man still shook as he nodded his head. Nathaniel moved forward to interject, but quickly stepped back at the sight of Kallian's glare.

"Now if you will excuse us, there is much to be done," Kallian released a faint reassuring smirk. She hardly knew what they would find upon this investigation, the thought of Darkspawn planning attacks seemed impossible, as did the notion that one of them obtained the ability to talk. Making haste to the Wending Wood seemed the logical choice, whatever was causing these attacks, would only get worse over time. Mervis merely nodded, his face still contained a hint of worry as he turned back toward the market.

As they neared the city gates, Kallian slowed to match Alistair's pace. He looked up, no glare in his eye this time. His ability to convey no emotion on his face annoyed her; she used to be able to read him like a book. Now, all she could do was stare absently at his face, searching for words.

"Thank you, for earlier..." She trailed off, not wanting him to see the pity she felt for herself.

"Think nothing of it, the woman was rambling," His tone was sharp as he kept his gaze straight ahead. Kallian had no response, had she really lost him entirely? She quickened her pace, trying her best to avoid letting him see her hurt face.

"I am not heartless Kali, I know your pain," He added, continuing to look forward as they exited the city. His fingers fumbling with a silver chain, she knew that chain. It was from his mother's amulet. She fell back slightly, a shadow of a smile donned upon her face.

Maybe hope wasn't completely lost.


	7. Fiona

_Alright so finally Alistair POV! I wont be doing this every other chapter like most other authors on here, but i felt this chapter was necessary. _

_Thanks to my beta **Argos**! this chapter came a lot easier than the previous one.  
Thanks to all of you who have story alerts and the few who've put it in their favorites!  
Reviews are much appreciated and help bring out chapters quicker, so keep em' coming!  
hope you enjoy!_

Chapter Six

Alistair watched with disdain as he walked down the narrow path behind Kali. She laughed heartily at something the mage had said, playfully hitting him on the arm. He despised how her entire face light up when she laughed, and how her hair always looked so soft and touchable, even after battling darkspawn for days. He wished he could stay angry with her, his life would be easier that way.

When he had left the Landsmeet, he left enraged. Alistair desired nothing more than to put a hole through the palace doors; instead he found royal shrubbery as a worthy substitute. It would have been easy for Kali to have followed him, he left leaves and a horrified servant in his wake..

The only thing on his mind was Duncan, the man who saved him from lyrium addiction and enslavement to the chantry. Duncan had changed his entire life; this included introducing Alistair to her.

Their meeting was not unlike any other pathetic love story, both from tragic backgrounds, brought together by a larger tragedy. Kallian Cousland was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Her hair was chocolate brown; perfectly framing her face, and accentuating her emerald green eyes. Her fair skin had hints of tan from the days of travel. When they first met he sensed the agony and despair within her.

_'Don't screw this up,' _Alistair thought. He racked his brain, trying to think of the perfect thing to say to her.

"You know, the one good thing about a blight is how it brings people together," he released a crooked grin, trying to mask how idiotic he felt. _'Stupid, stupid Alistair'._

He glanced up to see a smirk curl on her lips, '_Success!'_

His joy was only to be met with severe sorrow at the fall of Ostagar. It had taken him weeks to pull himself from his grief, the closest thing he had to a father, lay dead in the snow due to the cowardice of a single man. Alistair swore revenge; there was no way he would allow Teyrn Loghain to live after what he had done. It was not only the loss of Duncan that drove him, the wardens were the only family he had left, other than Cailan but he barely considered him family.

When she announced she would attempt to make Loghain a Grey Warden, he blacked out, the anger and sorrow overtook him. The first thing he could remember after was the look on her face as he turned away.

The next three years were spent wandering aimlessly. He stayed under the radar, as not to attract unwanted attention. Alistair knew about the notice Kali had put out for him, skirting around her scouts had become a game to him. He first traveled to Orlais, Duncan's homeland.

Alistair quickly found out he knew very little about his beloved mentor. Alistair learned that Duncan was recruited to the Grey Wardens on the eve of his execution, completely unwillingly. Duncan had grown up on the streets, picking pockets to survive. One night Duncan had broken into a room at the local inn and was confronted by a man. Duncan had slit the man's throat, only to find out days later he was a Grey Warden, and fiancé to the current Orlesian Warden Commander.

Surprisingly instead of letting the execution happen, Commander Genevieve enacted the right of conscription right there. Finding his skill as a rouge too valuable to pass up, and partly because she was impressed with his skill taking down a Grey Warden; not giving Duncan a choice in the matter, he came to Ferelden.

He had not been much older than Alistair upon his joining, a young man of twenty years.

Young seemed the wrong term for Alistair, he hardly considered himself a young man anymore. At the age of twenty three, he felt haggard and weathered. Spending the past five years of his life constantly on the move, he was tired, and that was when he became sloppy.

Upon return from Orlais, he first went to Highever to place his monument to Duncan; as he had promised. It was late into the fall and the leaves on the trees had begun to turn. A brisk cold wind nipped at his body as he entered the town, causing him to pull his heavy wool cloak tighter. Alistair looked around cautiously, keeping his pace quick. He was still fully aware of where he was, and who ruled these lands.

Alistair pulled up his hood, pulling it forward down his face, tilting his head to the ground. He would hardly put it past Teyrn Fergus Cousland to send him straight to the gallows. Alistair had only met the man once before and he was hardly friendly, it was just after Kali had discovered he survived Ostagar, just before the Landsmeet.

They had the exact same brown hair and emerald eyes, and his face lit up just as Kali's when he laughed. Though it had never been directed toward Alistair, Fergus would just glare over Kali's shoulder, looking at him as the one who defiled his sister. He hardly believed she would share something of that nature, or he at least he hoped.

After several loops around the town, Alistair found the cemetery, muttering curses under his breath as he entered. He spotted a tree in the far corner, past a great Coliseum that would be the perfect place for Duncan's monument. He had only taken a step forward when he spotted a familiar face. Jumping behind the nearest tree he peered around again.

She sat on her knees at the base of the Coliseum, holding a bouquet of roses, her face held the exact look it had contained upon their first meeting: sorrow. Alistair had to fight the urge to move forward, it had been three years since he had set eyes upon that face. Even with red teary eyes she was beautiful. It was very rare to see her without armor, she wore a simple powder blue day dress and her hair was pulled back into a quick pony tail. Sitting on the ground had caused the front of her dress to snag dirt, this made Alistair chuckle, _'Kali, you have not changed a bit'._

Alistair was surprised, his anger, the thing that has burned in his very core for these past years has turned to a completely different emotion: desire. The only thing he could think of, standing like a child behind this tree, was just walking up to her. To hold her in his arms and feel her breath on his neck, taking in her lavender smell, and his longing to hear her voice.

She was the only woman he had ever laid with, even on his travels, despite the numerous offers he had received, but he always rejected them quickly. It wasn't as if he was ruined or anything of that nature, it just wasn't something he took as lightly as other men he had met. He would wake up occasionally in his tent on the road, in his dingy old bedroll, and smell lavender; only to look to his side and seeing nothing but an empty bedroll.

Alistair looked back to Kali, she still sat there, talking to the coliseum. A small smile appeared on her face as her mouth moved; he couldn't quite make out what she was saying. Footsteps in the distance startled them both; Alistair whipped his head around to see Teagan walking toward her on the south side.

_'What is Teagan doing here?'_

She turned her head and gave him a soggy smile, whipping her eyes on the sleeve of her dress; she gingerly set the roses down. Not breaking eye contact with the Coliseum she muttered something under her breath, a prayer no doubt, and turned toward Teagan.

They talked softly, she kept her hands at waist level and her eyes on the ground, Alistair could see a few tears roll down her cheeks. Teagan placed a hand under her chin and tilted her head upward; placing a soft kiss upon her forehead, before sweeping her into a firm embrace.

Alistair narrowed his eyes, feeling his stomach twist, and a burning erupt in his heart. He didn't understand how to process this, Was Teagan just trying to comfort her as she visited her parent's grave site? His mind ran a thousand miles a minute. Each mile it ran he felt the fire grow stronger. What had he expected? Her to wait for him like a mabari at the door? Or for her to pine for him for the rest of eternity and never move on? He did not expect any of those things, but he could not explain why suddenly he felt so angry.

When he looked back up they were gone, nothing was there but grave stones and leaves blowing in the wind. The cold made his ears ache and dusk was fast approaching. Alistair still stood behind this tree, with balled fists and a knot in his stomach. He needed a drink.

One month later, Alistair knew his over indulgence in Amaranthine would not go unnoticed. For some reason he didn't mind, it was almost like he wanted her to find him. He had noticed the two soldiers', watching his every movement like hawks at the Crown and the Lion tavern. Instead of pulling up his hood and finding a back door, he smiled and tipped his mug in their direction.

_Let her come _Alistair thought smugly taking another sip of his brew; _I wish to give her congratulations in person._

Not even a week later, there she was, getting into bar brawls right in front of him. This time seeing her did not bring memories of the past, it brought the image of Teagan with his arms wrapped around her. The very thought of it made Alistair furious, and it's all he saw while looking into her face. Admittedly, he was rather harsh on her that night in the tavern, wincing at the thought.

_'At least I made a choice; I didn't run from my responsibilities like a child,' _Kallian stood in front of him, her nostrils flaring and eyes glaring down on him.

Alistair was livid, who was she to accuse him of acting like a child?

_'Oh that's a first, from what I hear you're a pro at running from trouble,' Alistair was screaming now, standing up and meeting her glare, 'You call what happened with Loghain responsibility? He aided in the fall of your castle, you let the man who had a hand in the death of your parents go free!'_

Alistair was horrified at his own words. He wished he could take it back the minute it left his mouth. Before he had a chance he was staggering backward, feeling pain shot through his jaw.

He did not have a chance to speak; she pushed him into a chair and threw a letter at him. He flipped the thick envelope in his hand, noticing the Warden seal planted firmly on the back of the envelope.

"Who is this from?" Alistair called after Kallian who stomped toward the back of the tavern, where the rooms were kept. Without bothering to look back she replied, spitting the words over her shoulder. "Your mother".

He stared down at the letter; the paper was yellowed and worn around the edges. Obviously it had been sitting in someone's pocket or desk, forgotten, for some time now. The fire crackled next to him, the heat coming off it warmed his face. He lifted his hand to his jaw, feeling a surge of pain as he carefully ran his fingers over his lip. She could hit harder than he remembered.

He exhaled heavily, glancing around the tavern, then back down to the letter.

_'You are being ridiculous; it cannot be from mum, not unless ghosts have started writing letters.'_

Alistair slowly popped the seal, pulling out a long parchment, upon it was writing from an unfamiliar hand.

_My dear Alistair,_

_I hardly know where to begin. Know that my son, I love you, I always have and always will. Do not feel bitterness toward Maric, he was a great man, who did not even know of my condition until after you were born. I was a young Warden recruited from the circle tower in Orlais, and he was the broken king of Ferelden, perhaps it was fate. My boy, it was rumored Wardens were not even able to conceive children; you must understand what a gift you were. I know I never deserved you, I could not provide a good life for you, and for that I am sorry; however, know that it is in your destiny to join the order Alistair, you must help finish what I have started. Help her, find the Architect, he is far more dangerous that he appears. Do not fall so willingly into his trap._

_My love, I do not regret any part of my past, other than the hurt you faced caused by my lies. I was but a foolish girl, with the son of a king. I would die a thousand deaths, just to take it back. To take you back. May the Maker guide you on your journey, where ever it takes you._

_Never forget, your mother loves you, always._

_Fiona_

Alistair read and reread the letter until his eyes were raw, sparsely taking an hour of rest. He agreed to help Kallian, clutching his mother's amulet in his pocket as he spoke.

Now here they were, walking a dusty road to the Wending Wood, a band of traitors out to save the world. The notion caused Alistair to chuckled, Nathaniel peaked curiously over his shoulder, and Alistair passed it off as a cough. The path had begun to narrow and the brush thickened, an eerie calm settling over them. Kali and Anders had stopped joking. She kept her hand firmly planted of the hilt of her blade, wincing at every sound. Alistair had started to wonder what he was missing when Kali broke out into a sprint.

He looked around wildly; finally his gaze fell upon a tipped over caravan, and all the bodies that lay around it.


	8. Wending Wood

_Hey sorry for the long wait, it has quite possibly been the worst week of my life and some nice reviews would help :)  
My lap top broke and it maybe a while till new chapters come out! sorry!_

_hope you enjoy!  
Thanks to **Argos, **for putting up with my slow returns and everything!_

Bile rose to Kallian's throat as she approached the caravan. Lying at her feet was a severed arm, fingers still wrapped firmly around a long sword. Her eyes swept over the scene, searching for movement of any kind, only to see destruction. There were no survivors among the mess, and the bodies that remained were quickly being engulfed by the flames.

"O Falon'Din Lethanavir", Kallian muttered the prayer under her breath, as a child in Highever her Elven hand maid taught her a few phrases, including a prayer for the dead. On the road during the Blight she had overheard Zeveran whisper it under his breath every time he brought down a foe. The Elven assassin held more compassion than he would like to let on. After the Blight, he decided it was too high a risk for him to remain in Denerim, as Kallian had wished, she has not heard from him since.

A loud bang came from over the hill, followed by arguing and curses, Kallian unsheathed her blade moving forward with caution.

It was only a group of bandits, they moved through the caravans looking for anything of value, and were quick to run at the sight of Kallian and her companions.

"Tis very doubtful we will find anyone alive commander," Nathaniel stepped forward, kicking a empty helm out of his way. She knew he was right, around them was a massacre, bodies littered the ground. All that was left was flaming carts and scavengers. She swallowed; grimacing at the burning it brought to her throat, and nodded.

"We must take a look around, judging by these remains, whatever did this is not far gone", Kallian turned to face them. Alistair was crouched over the body of a soldier, inspecting the wounds more thoroughly, he cleared his throat.

"Kali, these men were not killed by darkspawn", His voice carried a false confidence as he looked up to meet her gaze. "Look at these wounds".

Kallian stepped forward; the solider had been slashed across the abdomen, though the cut did not carry any of the darkspawn commonalities. The darkspawn did not forge their own blades, they foraged what they could from the deep roads, usually equipment left behind by the dwarves. Their swords were usually rusted and jagged, and normally their victims held signs of the taint upon death, this...this was different.

"Commander...I...I can feel something, something powerful in these woods,, Anders said, his eyes widened as he looked around, genuine concern crossing his face. Alistair stood and used his tunic to wipe the blood from his hands, nodding in agreement.

"We must approach with the utmost caution, I am unsure of what we are dealing with," Kallian barked the order, inside she felt the fear creep up her spine. _'Pull yourself together, Warden' _she thought, motioning them to move forward up the path. As they approached the top of the ridge there was a loud crack. Tree branches shot out from under the ground, wrapping around each other to form a cone. Kallian jumped into a defensive stance, about to pull her blade out narrowly missing Alistair, who, much to her surprise, had thrown himself between her and the wooden cone.

Kallian cocked her head at him, taking a millisecond to be confused. Did he not wish her dead after all?

As quickly as the branches formed they retracted back into the soil, leaving behind a small mage. She was small, with dark blonde hair pulled into a tight bun. Kallian's gaze was drawn to her facial tattoos, signature markings of the roaming Elvish clans known as the Dalish.

"More scavengers, coming to prey upon the weak and innocent?" the elf snarled, observing the group in front of her. "No, too heavily armed for that, mercenaries then?"

Kallian took a step out from behind Alistair, lowering her weapon slightly, in an attempt to come off as docile as possible. The mage's glare bore into her, holding her staff further out as Kallian stepped forward.

"I am Kallian Cousland, Commander of the Grey Wardens, are you the one behind all this?" Kallian's voice shook slightly, images of the dismembered body parts flashed through her mind.

"You tell those Shem merchants to return my sister, or the slaughter will continue." and with that the branches returned and she disappeared. Kallian looked around, no flanking from the rear, or various woodland creatures sneaking up.

"Are the Dalish not clan creatures? What is this one doing alone?" Nathaniel asked, slinging his bow over his shoulder. He had remained fairly quiet the entire journey, avoiding Alistair's random glares. He constantly looked perturbed, which made him especially vulnerable to Ander's jabs. Despite all that, Kallian believed he was beginning to warm up to her; at least his version of warming up.

"I'm suspecting that this all has something to do with that, and I intend on finding out for sure," Kallian replied, sheathing her weapon. "Let's start in that direction", she pointed over the tree line, to a plume of smoke.

"You have a unique ability for attracting apostates," Alistair joked, jogging up to Kallian's pace. His hood was finally down and he released a crooked grin, the one that made her heart melt. Kallian shook her head, _'no, no melting' . _

"I'd like to think of it as being personable."

She wrestled with the idea about asking him why he had thrown himself in front of her earlier, and although this was the most civil conversation they've had in three years, she decided to leave it. Instead she just gave him a coy smile, masking the true girlish giggle she felt, quickening her pace ending up next to Anders.

"So, do you think your fiancé is at the keep yet?"

"Shut up," she muttered, rolling her eyes

They approached a wounded soldier, he moaned painfully as they got closer. His eyes were white and his skin cracked, he was succumbing to the taint.

"W...who's there?" he called out, propping himself up on his elbow. He was covered in blood, she could not separate his from the demonic ichor.

"Commander Cousland of the Grey" she stated doing her best to calm him, "You understand this taint will kill you?"

"...Is already dead...Is already gone," his voice was ragged, squeaking occasionally. "...Came to stop the elf, but the Darkspawn...they were too fast"

Kallian's ears perked up at the mention of Darkspawn. "Darkspawn? Do they have anything with the Elf's missing sister?"

"Sister?...I had a sister...I think...Elf's sister was with them, made merchants look guilty," he suddenly doubled over, crying out in pain. "So much hurt...p-p-lease...end it"

"That Elf is slaughtering innocent people, over a mistake?" Anders toned grew appalled as he stepped forward, "We have to go find her!"

"End...it," the troop pleaded. Kallian's stomach twisted as she pulled out her dagger, with a quick slice, he was dead. "May the Maker guide you," she said, shutting his eyes.

A tingle erupted in the back of her skull, it vibrated her entire brain.

"When will they learn they cannot sneak up on us?" Kallian stood with a sigh.

The party turned to be greeted by a group of snarling Hurlocks.

Kallian fell to the ground with a crack, the Hurlock stood over her cackling, raising its long sword to bring down upon her head. She squeezed her eyes shut, waiting for an end that never came. She heard the Hurlock snarl then wheeze, opening her eyes as it lurched forward, a blade protruding from its chest.

Kallian groaned as it thudded to the ground, laying her head on the down, she stared up at the sky. She watched the clouds as they crawled through the sky, her entire body ached and she was fairly certain her rib was broken again. "Search the bodies, we may find something of use."

Alistair's out of breath face hovered over her, he offered his hand to help her up, he grabbed her wrist and she stood with a wince. She looked up to find that they stood only inches apart, she felt the warmth of his breath on her cheeks, they locked eyes. For a moment it seemed as though the world had stopped turning.

"Uh, Commander? I think I found something." Nathaniel called from across the clearing.

Kallian reminded herself to breathe, realizing Alistair's hand was still wrapped around her wrist, he quickly retracted it. Clearing her throat she hurried over to Nathaniel. Heat radiated through her face, she glared at Anders as he suppressed a giggle.

In the palm of his hand Nathaniel held a carved ironclad trinket; it was inlaid with silver and hung from a leather cord. Kallian picked it up, examining it closer, she smiled. This could be their upper hand. "We must find the Elf".

They entered a campsite, it looked freshly abandoned. Weapons were scattered across the site, embers crackled from the fire pit, Kallian's eyes were drawn to the four shallow graves on the edge of the site. The elf stood next to them, looking up with a fiery glare as they approached.

"I thought I told you to stay clear Shemlen", she quickly wiped a tear from her face. Kallian held her hand up, nodding for her companions to stay back. The elf continued to glare as Kallian stepped closer.

"The humans are not the ones who took your sister, the darkspawn just made it look that way". Kallian held out the trinket they had found in front of her by the leather cord, the mage just cocked him head in confusion, snatching it away.

"This was Seranni's, our mother gave it to her before she passed, she would never part with it," she frowned, carefully running her fingers over the carved necklace. "Where did you find it?"

"Dropped by a darkspawn, according to a fallen troop he witnessed them take her." Kallian took another step forward.

"My name is Velanna, if you care for such things," She dipped her head in a bow. "I understand I have given you no reason to trust me Warden, but please, let me join you to find my sister".

Her hazel eyes pleaded with Kallian.

It was as if all three of her companions grunted in argument behind her, Kallian shot a glare over her shoulder.

"How do I know you can be trusted?"

"I am unsure of the ways of shem—humans, but when family is involved, there is no room for betrayal". Her voice was steady and trust worthy, Kallian bit her lip before nodding.

"Well we must make haste, darkspawn mainly reside underground, is there anywhere around here of that nature?"

"Well...there are those silverite mines to the north, they have long been abandoned, worthy place to look" Velanna pointed to an ominous wooden door, seemingly plastered to the side of the mountain. She slid Seranni's necklace around her neck, not waiting for a response from Kallian, she set course for the door. Nathaniel and Anders were quick to follow, both gawking at the way the elf's hips moved in her Dalish robes. Alistair approached Kallian, she felt her cheeks begin to flush again.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked, avoiding eye contact.

"I hope so," she shrugged. Alistair shifted his weight uncomfortably as she met his gaze, he opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out.

"We should really...catch up with them" she choked, leaving him standing mouth gaping at the abandoned campsite. It took everything to tear herself away from him, her pace sped up to a trot; she did not risk looking back. Her heart pounded painfully, she rubbed her eyes with the palms of her hands, as she walked the path to the door. It was lined with broken stone archways and bones, her stomach felt uneasy as she moved past Velanna to the door.

With a deep inhale she opened it, only to find a dark and dusty staircase inside. Velanna tapped her staff on the ground, a ball of light erupted from the top, illuminating the entire cavern. The stairs spiraled down the walls, Kallian stepped onto the top step, it creaked loudly but otherwise held her weight. She nodded, signaling for everyone to move forward.

They moved down the staircase with caution, her hand firmly planted on her blade. Velanna moved in front of her lighting the path a head of them; when they reached the bottom Kallian looked around the huge stone room. The ceiling was a good a good half mile above them, nothing here but left behind mining equipment. As she entered the center of the shaft, a dark feeling engulfed her, a tingling in her head.

Before she had a chance to react, the floor around them light up, she had seen this before. Catching movement in her peripheral vision she looked to the top of the staircase. Some _thing _was there, she could sense it, though her eyelids grew heavy and limbs weak.

"Shhh...Sleep" a monotone voice rang out.

Kallian looked around, her companions faltered and collapsed around her. Fighting was useless, her vision tunneled as she fell to her knees.

"Sleep," the voice called out again, as the darkness of dreams pulled her in.

She struggled to open her eyes; it felt as though they had been weighed with stone. When they finally snapped open, she could only make out blurs of light. She felt her brain vibrate. Kallian jerked her arms, finding they were bound along with her ankles. She was too weak to fight her way free, and she was not alone.

Her eyes began to focus. It stood hovering over her, a tall Darkspawn. It wore robes, as a mage would, and a mask to cover its eyes. Its skin hung off the bone, and pungent of rot, she gagged slightly turning her head away. It held two glowing orbs in its gangly hands, lowering them closer to her face, as if to inspect her reaction.

"So, you are the Commander of the Grey Wardens? Do not be frightened, your injuries have been tended to," it frowned. "I am sorry for what I must do; I do not wish to be your enemy."

Distant yelling caught its attention. It straightened out, looking toward the door and mumbling something she could not make out. Kallian began to convulse her body, praying that her binds were weak. It looked back at her, face still holding a deep frown, it hovered a hand over her. A strange calm coursed through her body, like ice through her veins.

"Human behavior is still so...interesting. The son of Maric is strong, he calls for you; he will not calm."

Kallian felt a tear roll down her cheek as her eyes began to flutter, her breath became heavy and labored. She tried to pull at her restraints again, but the temptation of sleep was too strong.

"But now is not the time for that. Rest."

All she could do was let the fade take her, and pray for light.


	9. Stone Prison

**A/N: **_So lets start with: I am so sorry for the long period between updates._  
_But now i'm back with a new lap top and the hope people are still interested in my story.  
As always special thanks to **Argos**, for always making sure my material is readable :)_

_Please review! it's been awhile and i am feeling rusty so any opinions about this chapter are helpful. hope you enjoy!_

Alistair paced the length of his stone prison like a rabid animal, labored breaths came out in snarls as he anxiously scanned the room. A set of rusted bars surrounded him as fire crackled from the hearth in the corner, releasing a thin layer of light across the large dungeon. Water dripped from the ceiling, and an ice cold draft sent shivers up his spine.

Alistair felt tremors vibrate his entire body, his buzzing brain informed him of the guard stationed just outside of the large steel doors.

He had awoken not long before, no longer wearing his armor, he wore a dirt ridden tunic and leggings. His feet were bare, and he was stripped of all weapons. Alistair's head pounded as it did after too much indulgence in ale. He jumped to his feet; searching for any sign of her, his heart fell into his stomach. Kallian was not in this room.

Adjacent to him was a much larger cell, inside were three shadowed figures, slumped over still emerged in this temporary coma. The light barely reached them, Alistair could make out Anders' golden hair, Nathaniel's hooked nose and Velanna's small outline pressed against Nathaniel. All had been stripped of their weapons and dressed in dirtied clothes as well.

Alistair began to pace again. "KALLIAN!" he called, attempting to rattle the rusted bars, but to no avail.

He ran his hands shakily through his hair, both matted with dirt, rage pulsed through his veins. His throat was raw and swollen from screaming, hands red and cracked from shaking the bars, he felt so weak. His mind ran a mile a minute, where was she? Where were they? Who had put them here?

Her face kept flashing through his mind, Alistair remembered every freckle and dimple as if she was standing right in front of him. Her chocolate waves, and emerald green eyes, most of all her perfect smile. He felt the warmth of her body lying close to him in their tent, remembered how he had used the slow melodic rhythm of her sleeping heart sing him to sleep. For just a moment, he remember how truly happy he was.

He reached the rusted bars again, wrapping his hands tightly around them, then he thrashed around for a moment; praying to the maker that they may give way.

Alistair was not in their tent and he was not lying next to the love of his life. Out of all the things he wished he were, he was most certainly not happy. That was years ago, Alistair was not even that person anymore.

Three years ago he was a nothing more than a stubborn grieving teenager, graced with the gift of love. A gift he abandoned like the child she so accurately accused him of being.

Duncan would not have praised his actions, he would have smacked him upside the head and told him to turn around. Though he would never admit it to Kallian, Alistair felt he had betrayed Duncan more than she ever could have. Ever since that day in Ostagar.

Alistair would not let that awkward exchange at the abandoned Dalish camp be their last. She must still be alive, she had to be, he would accept no alternative.

"KALLIAN!" He screamed again, shaking the bars violently.

A moan from across the room drew his attention, Anders rose shakily to his feet, stumbling slightly before straightening out. The others began to stir, coughing and moaning as well.

"Well, this is different" The mage wheezed sarcastically, making a futile effort at dusting off his robes. The deep blue cloth was now completely soiled, his blonde hair stuck out in every direction. He looked around cautiously before moving closer to the front of his cell.

Nathaniel was to his feet and pulling Velanna to hers, his hand lingered around her waist for a moment. A click from the large steel doors caused them all to jump. A familiar buzz tingled up his spine, beginning to vibrate his entire brain.

Alistair saw the glowing orbs before he saw the gnarled darkspawn attached to them. It was very tall and lanky, soiled robes hung from its skeletal frame, it wore what appeared to be a mask covering its eyes. Alistair could feel the monster's gaze upon him as it glided across the dungeon.

"Where is she?" Alistair snarled.

The darkspawn cocked its head, a grin almost appeared upon its face, he gestured back to a large Hurlock who seemed to be carrying a bundle of blankets. It was only when the blankets let out a cry of pain did Alistair realize what they truly were.

"KALI" he yelped, he had flung himself toward the cell door, only to be caught mid air by an invisible force. Lifted off his feet and slammed in to the far wall of the cell, Alistair dangled helplessly trying to catch his breath. It was as if a stone golem held him there, the more he struggled, the tighter the force felt upon his chest.

The darkspawn waved its hand dramatically and the cell door opened; it entered taking two large steps to where Alistair remained frozen. It stopped only inches away from him, the smell of decay over whelmed his nostrils, he gagged slightly as it lowered its face to his level. It examined him for a moment before speaking.

"You are quite similar, son of Maric, the passion that runs through your veins most certainly ran through your father's." It spoke in a calm monotone voice, that almost put Alistair at ease. "Human nature will never be something I grasp, but I am glad to observe it."

It waved a boney hand, the Hurlock nodded and tossed Kallian onto the floor, the loud thud she made as she hit the stone floor made Alistair wince. It moved swiftly out of the cell, waving its gnarled hand, causing the cell door to slam shut. Alistair fell to the floor, wheezing as he crawled toward Kallian.

She was warm to the touch, he breathed a sigh of relief, pulling her to his chest.

"Goodbye, son of Maric"

It gave Alistair one last nod before extinguishing the glowing orbs and exiting the room. The large steel doors clicked behind it.

Alistair turned his attention back to Kali, gently stroking the hair from her face. Her normally rosy cheeks were a pale grey, plagued with dirt and dried blood, her lips were chapped and cracked. A poorly healed gash crossed her eyebrow, leaving her upper eyelid purple and swollen.

Her breath was short and shallow, eyebrows knitted as if she was stuck in a bad dream. Alistair continued to stroke her cheek, leaning his head down to her ear.

"Kallian?" he whispered "are you there?"

Her eye's snapped open they mirror pure panic, she launched herself from his arms. Alistair leapt back out of surprise, falling hard on his tail bone, he suppressed the urge to yelp in pain.

Kallian positioned herself in a corner, looking around wildly, she calmed slightly at the sight of Alistair.

"Where…" The words barely made it through her chattering teeth, as she desperately tried to catch her breath. A flash of pain crossed her face, she faltered falling into the stone wall, in a flash Alistair was at her side. Wrapping his arm around her waist, he o her feet, hefting most of her weight on to his side.

"I'm fine."

She tried to push him away with a weak shove. Kallian straightened herself out, standing on her own for but a moment before her knees gave out again. The flash of pain returned to her face, and Alistair refastened his arm around her waist. Pulling her close to him.

"You're a terrible liar."

Alistair felt like a terrible person, but all he could think about was his arms wrapped around her.

"Is she okay?" Anders hollered across the way.

"I'm not sure…a broken rib maybe" He grazed her side with his finger tips, Kallian's face scrunched up in pain, she exhaled heavily. He laced his fingers in hers before sliding up her tunic.

The sight made Alistair cringe.

"Well, that's not a good sign" she laughed slightly followed by a grimace of pain.

A large purple bruise spanned the majority of Kallian's upper abdomen.

"At least two broken ribs, maybe more" he sighed, "Anders?"

"Well I don't bloody well know what you think I can do from here, they took my staff, and my bag full of poultices"

"Really Alistair, stop fussing, I'm fine," Kallian pushed his hand away, taking a moment to collect herself before getting on to her feet. Leaning slightly against the bars, she squinted across the way.

"Is everyone alright over there?"

"Well other than my favorite robes being ruined, and Nathaniel's tall dark and something exterior being improved…" Anders trailed off under his breath.

"Anders, report," Kallian smiled

"Yes, we're all fine" his shoulders slouched as he rubbed his brow.

The door clicked again, all eyes flew towards it, Alistair instinctively reached to his waist; only to realize he was unarmed.

This time a small woman entered, in armor obviously too large for her.

"Seranni!" Velanna cried out reaching for her through the bars.

The small woman looked up with almost a smile, her features were delicate, her blonde hair barely reached past her chin. Her face bore the same tattoos as Velanna, she awkwardly adjusted her armor before rushing over to Velanna.

Alistair could see the tears running down the sisters faces as they argued in hushed tones, Velanna motioned aggressively toward the door several times.

"I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU HERE!" Velanna finally roared toward her frail sister, who fumbled with her hands and handed something to Velanna.

Seranni cupped Velanna's face in her hands, kissing her forehead lightly, and rushed from the room. Velanna watched her sister go without a word, she took a moment to gather herself, then walked to their cell door and unlocked it. Anders took the key from her and rushed over to their cell, unlocking the door and nearly sending Alistair flying to get to Kallian.

She was still leaning against the bars, swaying in and out of consciousness, a look of relief spanned her face as Anders approached her. Anders lowered her down to the floor, pulling up her tunic, witnessing the giant purple monstrosity.

"Oh this was what all the fuss what about?" He joked, hovering his hands over it. He placed his palm on the injury, Kallian winced again. "Sorry, cold hands".

Anders mumbled something under his breath before a bright light erupted from him palms, Kallians face immediately light up, she smiled. Anders stood, pulling Kallian to her feet, she nodded a thank you at him.

"Well, if you could try and stay healed this time, that would be idea.l"

Alistair exited the cell, feeling a twinge of jealousy, he wrung his hands. What were they supposed to do now?

"Seranni told me that we should head out that door, head to the east and we will find out way out" Velanna gestured toward a door across the room. As he turned to head toward the door, Alistair felt a small hand hook around his bicep, holding him back. He spun around to face Kallian.

Her face was regaining some of its color, though it still held the awful gash, something no doubt Anders could heal once they found his staff. Her hair lay limp upon her head, and she looked tired, her emerald green eyes stared right at him. Sending shivers down his spine.

"Thank you" She stated.

"For?"

"When I was in that other room, I hear a voice calling my name, telling me to hold on" She took a step closer to him. "Thank you, for making me always want to hold on".

She pecked his cheek, before rushing off to catch up with the group, Alistair stood in the middle of the dungeon for a moment. Dumbstruck.

He smiled to himself, reaching up to his cheek, he was taken back to three years before.

'_I can't imagine myself without you, ever.'_

'_No matter what Alistair, I will always be yours, I will always come back to you'._

If only that were still true.


	10. The escape

_Thanks again to my beta Argos for making sure this is readable. hope you all enjoy!  
Please review! feed back is most helpful.  
-G_

A hilt to the jaw caused Kallian to stagger backwards. The shock was followed with the faint taste of copper. Kallian shook her head before returning to a battle stance. Idling before her was what could only be described as a nightmare.

It stood swaying in _her_ drake scale armor, holding _her_ summer sword in its left, and in its gnarled right was Duncan's Dagger. Kallian glared intently, hoping her rage would will her to breathe fire. Her knuckles ached as she gripped a darkspawn's rusted blade tighter.

Its features resembled that of something vaguely female, dirtied blonde hair hung below its shoulders, and its withering figure almost filled out her armor. The darkspawn taint had removed most of her humanity. She stood in front of Kallian as a ghoul, her skin was pale and cracked, and her eyes were a cream white—framed with dark circles. No longer possessing the ability to use words, it just furrowed its brow and bared its teeth, as a mabari would before attacking.

It charged with a thunderous cry, the clink of _her_ boots echoed throughout the underground tunnel, Kallian rolled her eyes. _Wait for it, wait, wait._ The ghoul attempted to lunge its blade in Kallian's torso, putting all its weight onto its front foot. Kallian spun on her heel in one delicate dance-like movement, she hooked her hand around its bicep, flinging her weight behind it. With a small cry she swung her blade, its jagged edge sliced halfway through the ghoul's neck, stopping at the spine with a wet knock. It was enough. Kallian rounded to the front of it ripping the blade free and watched as the little signs of life this _thing _had faded away.

It fell to its knees, blood pouring down Kallian's armor, before falling face down.

Kallian heard the clatter of footsteps running up behind her. Hastily, she dropped the bloodied blade and then used the back of her hand to wipe the sweat from her brow. She squatted down, inspecting her armor carefully, before cautiously removing it.

Kallian looked behind her. Nathaniel was at the front of the group, while the rest staggered behind him. They were attempting to replace their armor while trying to keep up with his pace. Nathaniel's dark hair was once again pulled back and his eyes narrowed as he paused momentarily only to adjust the bow on his shoulder.

"Feeling slightly barbaric are we?" he muttered from behind her, the permanent frown upon his face slightly deeper than normal.

"I didn't want to ruin my armor," Kallian protested, getting to her feet. "Wade would kill me, and do you know how long in the Deep Roads it took me to get this many scales?"

"Not to mention how many drakes we faced," Alistair said in a low chuckle from behind her.

They had escaped from the rotted dungeon to find these random _experiments_ throughout the mine, wearing their armor, and using their weapons. Kallian's was the last to be found.

They passed another ghoul, already dead on its back, the taint had over taken him. Nathaniel froze, looking down, his mouth hung open. His dark eyes darted all over the body of the ghoul, widening as he made the realization.

"This was one of the Wardens recruits that was taken Commander," Nathaniel choked, "He helped throw me in the holding cell."

"You're sure?" Kallian asked, a feeling of terror crept through her.

Nathaniel opened his mouth as if to form words, but could only bring himself to nod.

"We need to find a way out, now!" Kallian ordered.

The light was blinding, it blazed white as Velanna opened the door, Kallian had to close her eyes as she stepped out from the mine. The cool fall air washed over her face. After the burning stopped Kallian opened her eyes again, sweeping her fuzzy gaze over the forest in front of her. They exited a different door than they came, though the terrain looked familiar.

No ambush awaited them and it appeared that no one was searching for them either. Just how long had they been down there? The sun sat in the late hour of the sky, turning the distant horizon a shade of maroon, she had never been so grateful to see such a sight.

Fatigue ran through her. Every muscle in her body ached. Her armor felt as if it weighed a ton and she was hungry. _By the maker have I ever been this hungry before?_

Kallian was determined to reach the keep as soon as possible and update Varel, she was sure he'd be quite interested in this. Also the fact they were all still alive.

Kallian began to march toward the path, mentally pushing herself to move forward. They had journeyed until the darkness surrounded them, Kallian could barely make out where her next step would land.

After a slightly heated argument with Anders and the threat of no more healing, Kallian agreed to stop for camp. They were no more than a day away from the keep and as Anders had put it, "We will move no faster if you are dead." He could be so convincing when he wanted to be.

They had found a clearing next to a river bed, Kallian debated putting up her tent, after all that time staring at stone—the stars were far too inviting. She made herself comfortable next to a fire, recording the experience in her journal, keeping the memory fresh so as to review later.

After she finished, Kallian shut her leather bound journal, and after placing it delicately to her side, began to watch the fire. She found this was often a pastime for her, her eyes focused on as the flames licked at the wood.

Kallian pulled her knees to her chest, smiling to herself, thinking of once lost memories.

_Kallian was five again, laying on the floor in her father's study, watching the hearth as the fire did an enchanted dance around the stone carvings inside. She outstretched her hand, wanting to capture the dancing fire for herself ,but her father caught her hand inches from the hearth._

"_No, no pup…It's hot," he held his young daughters hand in his, hovering it just outside the hearth so they could feel the heat emanating from it _

"_See?" _

_She nodded coyly, as her father pulled her into his lap, not breaking her sight on the fire. She settled back into his chest, a feeling of security settled in, as her father wrapped his arms around her._

"_Oh pup…you are a trouble maker aren't you?" He chuckled, placing a tender kiss atop her head._

"Uh, you are aware that fire burns things, right?"

Kallian snapped back to reality, her hand reaching dangerously close to the small fire in front of her, she quickly pulled it away—feeling the dull burning still in her finger tips. She looked up, Alistair stood over her, a sense of concern covered his face. He lowered himself down, placing himself parallel to her, he looked first to the fire then to her.

"How…How're you feeling?"

"Fine, eager to get back to the keep," Kallian said quickly as she fidgeted with her cloak, pulling it tighter around her shoulders, as the cold whipped harshly at her cheeks. "Many will be anxious to hear of our safety."

She bit her lip at the last sentence, refusing to look up to receive whatever face Alistair had made. Kallian honestly wondered, why had he come back?

They sat in silence for a moment and after a long pause, Alistair finally cleared his throat, a move Kallian knew all too well. It was an often occurrence when they first met, it was his nervous tick, which made her arch an eyebrow to what he was about to say.

"Will your betrothed be there?" The words oozed out of his mouth like venom, a stone glare into the fire matched them.

"Alistair…" Kallian whispered his name, trying her best to hide her annoyance. Did he not remember what had happened as clearly as she did? Was it different sequence of events? When did everything switch back from him hating the very sight of her?

"What? I am just very interested in seeing this man I used to consider family," he narrowed his eyes at her. "Wish him congratulations."

His words derided her, playing a childish game she wished to have no part of. She stood up, dusting off her already dusted clothing, before turning to him.

"I do not wish to talk of him, _not_ with you," she scowled. Kallian began to walk away toward the river, running her hands over her face, hoping her frozen digits would cool the anger.

A rustling of ground behind her gave away that Alistair had gotten up as well, taking her frustrated exclamation as an invitation to follow her. Anders snored loudly from a small fire across the camp, as Nate and Velanna were entrapped in a conversation of their own; he pushed a lock of hair from her face.

Kallian sighed heavily, reaching the river bed, Alistair's thudding steps still on her heels.

"Do you love him?"

"What?" her cheeks flushed again, not quite sure of what she heard. Did he actually have the audacity to ask such a question? He circled to the front of her, like a vulture. He stood in front of her so close she felt the heat of his breath on her face.

"Do you love him?" His voice raised with irritation as he repeated himself, a spark of jealousy ignited in his hazel eyes.

"I…I…Yes of course!" She stammered, trying to move past him, he just stepped to the side continuing blocking her path.

"You're a terrible liar," he scoffed, his gaze bearing into her. Kallian felt the air whoosh from her lungs.

"You left me, Alistair! It is too late…"

Alistair cut off her sentence, pressing his lips hard against hers, the warmth of his body swarmed around her. Kallian wanted to resist, but she couldn't help but to let herself be drawn closer as he parted her lips with his. He still held the same taste, and smell. His hand floated down to the small of her back, causing her spine to seize up. He wrapped his arms around her, locking her into his chest, a place that felt like home.

Kallian pulled away, gasping for air, as he started to tenderly kiss her neck—sending chills throughout her entire body.

Teagan's smiling face flashed into her mind, she had just accepted his proposal and he was running all over Highever informing people of the good news.

"Alistair, I can't….I can't," she said out of breath, pushing him away. He took a step back, breathing heavily with a school boy smile plastered on his face. His eyes were alight and it took every fiber of her being not to take him back into her arms. Kallian looked shamefully to the ground, hoping she would disappear.

Alistair's rough hand caught her chin, tilting her face up to meet his, continuing to smile.

"You once told me, we would always be together," he placed a delicate kiss upon her cheek, "I intend to see that through".

He pulled away, turning without a second glance and striding away back toward the camp. Leaving Kallian sitting by the river, mouth gaping as he walked away, this time watching his back was different. It gave her a new sort of fluttering feeling. Kallian moaned out of frustration, the kiss still tingled on her lips as she turned back toward the water.

"_Maybe I'm fooling myself…am I fooling myself?" Alistair paused in front of her, his eyes glowed in the hue of the campfire; "Do you think…you could ever feel the same way? About me?" _

_He nervously rocked as she searched his face, taking in this moment for her own, to forever remember it as one of the happiest she'll ever experience._

"_I think I already do," she smiled, chuckling at the relieved expression upon his face. Alistair corrected himself quickly._

"_So I fooled you did I?" he turned on his best suave voice, taking a step in, placing a kiss upon her lips. "Maker, what have I done to become so lucky?"_

Kallian grimaced, wrapping her arms around herself, fighting a shiver not caused by the cold. All she could see before her was darkness, she found a strange sense of irony in this, glancing back to see the glow of the camp and albeit her past—Kallian let another memory flicker through her mind before turning back.

"_If life were perfect, we'd of never met." _


	11. Return to me

_**A/N: **Hey Hey! only took three months but I finally got a new chapter! bah sorry it's been a rough few months but i'm back now with lots of new  
ideas for this story so i hope i still have the same loyal fan base! Keep on the look out for an old friend._

_**Please review, I've been out of the game for a bit so it helps to know i've still got it.  
**-G_

Kallian refused to open her eyes just yet, she could hear the soft dribble of rain upon her tent top, and a low roll of thunder in the distance which made her stomach turn. The storm had begun in the early morning hours, starting with a soft drizzle, progressing into a heavy rain. It was just warming up.

The previous night she had waited by the river bed until the camp was quiet and dark. Once the light from the fire had finally extinguished and all grew dark, she rushed to her tent with a speed she had not used since the Archdemon itself. She leapt as a graceful halla over a sleeping Anders and caught a glimpse of Alistair's snoring back as she did so, she dove into her tent with a gasp, pulling the canvas flap tightly shut behind her.

The night was spent in a flurry of frustrated tossing and turning, every once in a while she would even stand up, thinking it'd be best just to stomp right out there and kick him in the ribs. It took a lot of internal talking down to convince her this idea would not turn out well. She sat awake, watching the tent door, expecting to see golden hair making its way through at any moment. She watched until her eyes burnt and limbs felt heavy, finally she accepted retreat and closed her eyes.

The sound of Alistair clearing his throat outside of her tent forced open her lazy lids. Her vision was fuzzy, she saw blobs of tan tent around her, smelling the mildew and feeling the immediate chill surround her.

"So…as much fun as I'm having getting completely soaked, our fellow companions are not sharing my enthusiasm."

Kallian just groaned in response, she could hear him shift his weight awkwardly in the mud before finally walking away. She dreaded stepping outside of this tent, seeing his dripping face, feeling as though she had been warped back to three years previous.

How was it that once everything seemed so certain, it had become so shambled? Hardly a fortnight ago she was certain she was to marry Teagan. She would marry him and they would live _happily_ together. That thought was now twisted, uncertainty weaved it's way into her mind and could not be shook.

"_Do you love him?"_

It was a good question, would she ever truly love Teagan? Marriage was not entirely about love, according to most the nobles she had met in her short time as commander, it was mainly about security. Through painful dinners she endured in Queen Anoras court, she had taken the time to observe her peers, watching closely the way they moved amongst one another. Her main observation upon these investigations; she never saw a nobles wife look at him the way she had once looked at Alistair. The looks they conveyed were that of disdain and resentment, maybe sometimes her eyes would contain contentment, but very rarely did Kallian see true happiness.

Kallian had seen Teagan's sideways glances toward her at these dinners, seen the way his face would light up when she entered a room. Fergus had made it abundantly clear how much he approved of this union, taking over in their mothers place on nagging her to settle down.

"Teagan is a good man, he can take care of you" Fergus responded to Kallian's fears while walking in the garden one evening. This raised another question in Kallian's mind: did she just want to be taken care of?

Kallian could see into their future together, and she felt an overwhelming wave of guilt. She may never be able to produce the heir he desires and she may never be able to produce the love he desired. She flipped on to her other side with a note of aggravation, why must Alistair raise so many questions in her with just one of his own.

_Why had he come back?_

She thought about the first year after Alistair had left her; how she would lay in bed dreaming he would sneak through her chamber door and take her in his arms, only to wake to an empty bed in a cold chamber. Those desires faded in time, it soon became she had no dreams of love or dreams at all for that matter, sleep became a black abyss that she no longer wished to visit.

Kallian deeply exhaled, pulling her cold hands across her face, wiping the moisture away that had accumulated there. Her brown hair had formed into one big knot and she wished for nothing more than a warm bath. This world was cold and unforgiving.

It was time to start the day.

oooooooo

They were soaked, a wetness to the bone, Kallian felt as though she never knew what it was to be dry. She looked up to the cloud covered sky; it had gone from a dull grey to a blanket of black and rain fell in sheets. A heavy fog covered the road making it hard to determine where her next step would land. The mud squished beneath their boots, finding itself caked up to their thighs, they were miserable.

It had been raining like this for the a majority of the day, making Kallian entirely focused on reaching the keep, and giving her an excuse to refuse to stop for break that spanned more than one hours time. Occasionally she found herself unable to help the urge to look over her shoulder toward Alistair, who found the rain and mud far to unappealing to be smug. He waded through it like the rest of them pulling his hood tighter over his head, he had kept his mouth shut so far. For this she was thankful.

Upon one of their breaks Anders trudged up beside her with a huff, his blonde locks dripping wet and plastered to his cheek bones. Kallian refrained from giggling, the look upon his face was very similar to that of a cat who'd been thrown into water. She turned her head quickly, unable to contain her smirk any longer.

"Oh…I am so glad this brings you amusement" He shifted his weight and crossed his arms "At least I now know you still possess the ability to smile"

"Anders…of course I still smile, it's this bloody rain" she stated, straightening herself out. Kallian watched as his brows knitted, his eyes ran over her face, searching for an answer she would not easily give up.

"Hogwash! You've been like this since that night at camp, don't think I didn't see that _Alistair_ follow you out to the river" Anders said Alistair's name at a whisper, looking back over his shoulder to confirm he was still pouting on a boulder a few feet away from them, Anders leaned in closer. "What happened?"

"He just…he was right" She sighed.

Thunder clapped over head, a flash of lightening set the sky a blaze, the rain seemed as though it was getting heavier. They were less than a half a day away from the keep, she stepped forward, indicating it was time to move forth.

oooooooooo

Alistair kept his eyes pinned on her back, watching the way her hips moved as she stomped through the mud, pretending not to notice her large green eyes glance backward every so often. Using his entire being to resist releasing a large grin.

Her long brown hair was pulled into a sloppy ponytail that sagged under the weight of water it had taken in, her already porcelain skin was paled even further beneath the layer of mud that had begun to cake her entire body. Even soaking wet and covered in mud she was the most beautiful creature he had ever lain eyes on.

He thought back to a few months prior, thinking of a pub he had stopped at in Kirkwall, the hanged man. A filthy bar, occupied by the cities lower class, it was his kind of establishment. He sat alone at his table, taking large swigs from his pint of ale as he thumbed his mothers amulet in his pocket. It may have belonged to his mother but now all he could think about when he looked at it was Kallian. She was the one who retrieved it for him, found it in Eamon's study in the mist of Connors possession.

He had been so lost In his thought's he hardly noticed an elf pull up a chair and sit at his table. He quickly pulled his hand from his pocket.

Alistair recognized the scent of Antivan leather before he even looked up, he started to tilt his head up, noticing the tanned arms and blonde hair he couldn't help but smile.

"Zevran, out of all of our companions you are the one I am least surprised to see".

"I wish I could say the same, Alistair" Zevran nodded returning the smile, "Here I am just passing through to visit old friends in the nearby Dalish tribe, when I hear I have an old friend right here in Kirkwall".

His words were heavily accented, the elf sat across from him in a strangely angelic form, his gaze connected with Alistairs with an electric shock.

The years had begun to catch up with him, lines framed his eyes and his long blonde hair idled around his shoulders, his knife like ears peaked out just from under it. Zevran wore lavish leather armor, no doubt a token of Kallian's gratitude, she always seemed to have a special fondness for this assassin that Alistair could never quite wrap his head around.

Looking at Zevran brought Alistair back to nights at camp, sitting around the fire watching as Kallian would stifle a giggle at whatever clever story this elf would conjure up. Pain struck at his heart, his mouth twisted slightly at the thought of her smile.

"Friend?...Never a word I would've thought you'd use to describe me", Alistair brought the pint to his lips again, watching as Zevran shifted his weight forward, narrowing his eyes as he opened his mouth to speak.

"No, it is true, after what happened…" he paused, looking down at the table searching for the words. "After you left, I would hardly consider you friendship material"

His bluntness caught Alistair off guard, he sat with the pint still at his lips for a moment before setting it back down on the wooden table, wrestling with words in his mind to argue but Zevran interrupted.

"She is alive, in case you hadn't heard" The elf sneered, "she survived— just barely"

"Of course I've heard of the Hero of Ferelden's glorious success, I am sure the entirety of Theadas knows"

"Will you never be done with this childish grudge? Loghain is dead, consider it the past"

Alistair felt the blood rush to his cheeks, "Tis' not that simple…"

"Is it not? It has been years, what has yourself loathing accomplished? Have you avenged any of your fallen comrades with these actions?"

"Zevran, why have you come here?" Alistair's voice hardly hide his annoyance.

"I care for Lady Cousland. She gave me the second chance that no one else would grant." He stood, pulling on a long green cloak before leaning down on the table, his voice turned very serious and spoken in almost a hush.

"She still turns flushed every time someone is announced at the gate; and jumps for every unaddressed letter she receives. I was not lying when I said just happened across you, but as soon as I heard of the drunken..._ex-warden,_ I had to come inspect this for myself."

The pub still raged around them, a drunk smacked the bar maids rear end with a hoot as she walked past, and some shady dealings went on between some dwarves in the far corner. Zevran lowered his face even more until his mouth was directly next to Alastair's ear, he could feel the his hot breath as he spoke.

"I wanted to make sure you knew, how truly foolish you are" he pulled away, turning on his heel and walking out the door without a second look back. Alistair was again left alone, sitting at a dusty table, unable to believe that had just happened.

He was pulled from his memory by a gasp of relief escaping his companions lips, his heart jumped into his throat as he looked up to see they had finally arrived at Vigils Keep.

The pace quickened as they entered through the great main gates. Voices rang throughout the court yard, the rain and fog was still far too thick to see that far around him.

Alistair could just make out the large silhouette of stones walls, various huts scattered within them. They passed an empty livestock pen, blood splattered armor was stacked within it's rotting gates now, many he recognized as darkspawn armor. His heart rate quickened.

"The commanders back!" one voice called out.

"Someone inform the Seneschal!" said another.

It was an enormous castle, they strode past young men and women sparring in the court yard. Alistair could see where the fire had eaten away at the roofs of the homes, he could still almost smell the soot through the smell of heavy dew. The young warriors stopped and turned, slowly dipping their heads as they passed them, he couldn't help but notice many whispers and forward nods in his direction. Alistair wondered how many actually recognized him through his heavy wool cloak.

They finally reached a large stair case that lead up to the main hall, as they approached the bottom the great oak doors burst open, a tall well built man in silverite armor stepped out. He clinked as he descended the stone stair well. His grey hair was long and unkempt, and his eyes noted his lack of sleep, though a wide smile spread across his face as he saw Kallian at the lead of the group.

"Oh thank the maker! We were about to leave in search of you" He stopped just before her feet and saluted her. "I am so relieved you are alright".

Kallian stepped forward and spoke to him in quick hushed tones Alistair could not quite hear. He kept behind her, hoping not to draw any attention to himself, Nathaniel, Velanna and Anders were already making their way into the keep. He wondered if he should just follow them when another burst from the great hall doors, this face was much more familiar.

It had been quite a few years since Alistair had seen Teagan, he watched as he rushed down the stairs toward Kallian, feeling the same twinge of jealously he had watching them in the cemetery in Highever.

His brown hair now had strands of grey throughout it, though he still stood tall as Alistair remembered, and his face still read of kindness. Painted with relief as he finally reached her, pulling her frail frame into his for a large embrace which seemed to last for eternity.

Alistair just looked uncomfortably to his feet, wishing even more now for the gift of invisibility, he finally reached up to remove his hood.

'_Well it's got to happen sometime'_ he thought.

Kallian finally pulled herself from Teagan's arms, looking over her shoulder then back at him. "There is…something I must tell you".

'_So she did not tell him the purpose of her journey' _. His thoughts rang with an odd sense of satisfaction.

Teagan's eyes searched his face, squinting slightly before a look of disbelief settled in.

"Alistair?"


	12. What a mess

**A/N: **_Where do i begin?  
I know it's been forever since any updates, and I'll be surprised if anyone still wants to read this. I was gonna leave this story for dead, but I was going through old documents and found a half finished chapter, and I don't know what it was...I needed to keep going. _

_So if you have read before and are still going, I love you, and if this is your first time, well i love you too and hopefully you're liking this. kinda a filler CH to get me back into._

There was little that could be said to make the situation better, Kallian argued this point over in her head before settling on the decision to just sit quietly on the edge of her large desk. She bit her lip, watching restlessly as Teagan paced the length of the room, the light from the hearth illuminated his worried features.

Her nineteen odd years of living in Highever taught her full well; when dealing with one whom had armies at their disposal, it was best to let them vent before proposing an argument.

After they had arrived in the courtyard and Teagan had registered who traveled in her party, she had little time before his face twisted in confusion, and he leaned in very close to her not breaking eye contact with Alistair.

"May i have a word with you..." he straightened up, clearing his throat as he smoothed his tunic "In private?"

"Of course", Kallian gestured him up the giant stairwell and into the keep, which brought them to her study. Where she still sat in nervous silence, waiting for Teagan to speak.

He finally stopped to face the fire, rasing his hands up in an exaggerated motion and placing them upon his face, rubbing his eyes for a moment.

"I was worried" He said keeping one hand on his chin, placing the other delicately upon his hip. His tunic was ill fitting, baggy and sloppily tucked into his trousers, Kallian suspected he has been at the keep longer than he intended to. Which made her ponder exactly how long they had been gone.

"Teagan I..." She tried to begin her explanation, though she didn't even really know what she was to say.

He held his hand up, wheeling around to face her, a look in his eyes that did not quite reveal anger but scared her all the same. In their time together Kallian had yet to cause Teagan fury, they had yet to have any real arguement other than that of a playful nature. She could feel something had changed.

If it was not inside her it was in his demeanor; normally Teagan stood with a confindence you could not find in many nobles in Thedas, though now he looked into her eyes with a misery. He took several large steps to stand directly before her, with a quick motion he wrapped his arms around her shoulders, pulling her into a tight embrace. They stood in a continued silence for a few moment, she felt awkward and uneasy about the contact.

"You have no idea how relieved I am to find you alive" speaking in a hushed tone before placing his chin atop her head. "It has been almost a fortnight since we recieved your last correspondence, I had begun to fear for the worst".

His voice continued to carry that hint of hurt, the one which tore at Kallians heart with every word. He held her there in his arms, his breath ragged and seeming unwilling to let her go quite yet.

She allowed herself to close her eyes, taking in a shallow breath, only to be warped back to two nights prior.

She felt Alistairs hot breath on her face, his arms hungrily pulling her into him, his lips pulsing with a desire that seemed long dormant within them both. The longing deep within her chest; causeing a dull ache that made her gasp, Teagan pulled away. His hands remained firmly on her shoulders as he lowered his gaze to meet hers.

"What is it love?" His eye's strained to find the answer within her face but were only met with a blush she could not resist.

"Teagan, I..." She paused, guilt extinguishing the passion that had just run through her veins, she looked upon this man who loved her. Clearing her throat, she was just about to tell him what caused her heart to ache when a knock on the door echoed through the room.

"What is it?" Kallian choked out, jumping at the oppertune distraction. Teagans eyes narrowed, he finally released her, moving infront of the hearth without a word.

The door clicked open, Varel strode in with Anders, Nathaniel, and Alistair close on his heels. Kallian tenced up, Alistairs face still contained a smug expression that she wished she could beat out of him. Varel stopped before her, saluting before fixing his posture, and raising an eyebrow at her flushed complexion.

"I am very sorry for the distrubance Commander, but after hearing what these men are telling me happened...It just seems somewhat...embelished, Commander"

"Well depending on who you are asking Varel, It very well might be" Her eye's darted toward Anders, whose boyish grin vanished and attention shifted towards his feet.

"The last letter we recieved from you almost a fortnight ago, mentioned going to the Wending Wood to examine a claim made by a vendor, what happened from there?"

"Mervis was making claims on attacks on merchant caravans, we found it to be true. We found that Velanna was under the impression that merchants had kidnapped her sister...speaking of her; where is Velanna?" Kallian looked amongst the group in her office, finding no sign of the elf.

"I set her up in the guest quarters until we can find her something more suitible, Commander" Nathaniel said, a spark in his eyes at the mention of the mage. "I imagine after what happened...she'd like some time to herself".

"I will inform housekeeping; we will have a room for her in the east wing before morning."

"Commander", Nathaniel nodded in gratitude, his raven black hair falling in his face as he did so. Kallian found her companions fascination with Velanna amusing, especially enjoying the uplifted mood it put him in, she was all to eager to facilitate it.

"As I was saying..." Kallian continued her story to Teagan and Varel, their expressions turning to that of horror when she began to explain the encounter with the Architect.

"It knew we were coming even before we did, it had it's ambush ready, Velanna and her clan were merely pawns in it's plan", Kallian sighed with frustration "So stupid...I should have sensed it, known we were walking right into a trap".

She ran her fingers through her ratted hair, leaning against her desk, finally begnning to feel the extent of her exhaustion.

"There is no possible way you could have known, Kali" Alistair spoke up from the corner of the room. He had slumped back there when the rest entered the room, trying to hide from the uneasy feeling that clouded there.

"You were among three other Wardens, including one who is your senior, and we sensed nothing."

His words slide out of his mouth as velvet, blanketing around her in a reassuring warmth, causing blood to rush to her cheeks. Alistair released a crooked smile in response to her blush, which only caused her pale skin to turn a deeper red. She shifted uncomfortably as she felt Teagans glare cross the room.

"I appreciate the sentiment Alistair, but that is hardly an excuse I can merit any longer, I have men to command an they expect more of me" She corrected her posture, crossing behind her desk and gazing out the window, wondering what exactly that black horizon held for them.

"Well, there is little we can do about it at this moment" Varel coughed "I imagine you wish to rest after such a strenious journey, we shall take our leave...gentlemen?" he put an extra emphasis on the gentlemen, shooting a look Teagans direction.

They filtered out of the room, all except Teagan who still stood by the fire place with an exacerbated look upon his face. Kallian bit her lip in anticipation of what he would say, pulling her chair out and easing her sore muscles to sit down. A chill ran up her spine as he moved forward, this was hardly a conversation she could fathom to deal with now.

"I will let you get some peace, my dear", He said reaching down to clasp her hand, it's warmth shocked her ice cold skin.

"Teagan..."

"We will speak more tomorrow", He released a slight grin before turning and exiting, leaving the door ascew behind him.

Kallian slumped into her chair, pulling her hands to her face, sighing deeply as she reclined further into the leather. Turning it slightly as to be facing the hearth and away from the door, she finally let one tear roll down her cheek, as she watched the flames dance.


	13. A beer my friend?

**A/N:** _Hey quick turn around this week, I want wednesday to be my normal update day. _

_Thanks for amazing reviews and story alerts! those will only make me want to crank out chapter faster. Just remember be gentle, it's been a while._

**Chapter Twelve**_  
_

Alistair funneled out with the rest of them, hearing mention of a kitchen nearby, he set out on an expedition to find it. His stomach growled angrily; shaking his lungs, causing him to pause and think of when his last decent meal may have been.

_'The wardens curse', _he smirked to himself. A constant feeling of famish, he could no longer resist.

The halls were cold, no, not just cold, they were frigid. The night had bloomed into full effect, leaving a thin fog on the keep's windows, hinting that these stone walls did hold some heat. Though he did not feel it to be true.

There was only the light of the torches now, a dimmed flicker illuminated the way, they revealed paintings along the walls. A specific painting caught Alistair's eye, it did not match those of Grey Wardens past, and faithful mabari, an epic battle scene or two. No, this one caused him to take a second look, though the portrait portrayed the Arl in his younger years; he would recognize that hooked Howe nose anywhere.

Rendon Howe stood tall, his foot rested upon the body of a wolf, a bow strapped to his back. His hair was not yet grayed, but a raven black, just as Nathaniel. His eye's were still small, and soulless, as if he had a sinister plan brewing all those years ago. A image of Howe groveling on the ground after Kallian had skewered him flashed through his mind, he couldn't help but take pity for this man, though all he did do was lead him to the executioner.

Alistair decided this picture had taken up residency long enough, wondering how It had already not been removed. He pulled it from the wall, dropped it to the ground with a crack, and turned it around. He smacked his hands together, very proud of himself, and began on his mission again. With the mans son a daily presence, Kallian needed no more reminders of Howe, the man who had taken almost everything from her.

His armored heels reverberated through out the halls, loud clinking sounded with every step, he self consciously lightened his walk. The kitchen had resided behind a maze of doors, Alistair only relied on the smell of food to guide his way. He opened the door to find Anders and Nathaniel had beaten him there; both sitting at the small table in the corner, slurping down the leftover stew from dinner. The cook was a young elven woman, she batted her eyes in the men's direction. Anders threw compliments that cause a blush to rise to her neck. She corrected herself quickly upon Alistair's arrival, ushering him to the open seat at the table.

"Ah, the man of the hour" Anders placed his bowl down, clapping his hands at Alistair. "I hear you're quite an ale entrepreneur".

"I guess you could say that", he replied, the wood of the chair groaning beneath his weight. A bowl with an intoxicating scent was placed in front of him, it had the consistency of mud, but never had it looked so good. He began to take hefty spoonfuls in his mouth, euphoria filled each bite, he finished the bowl in the a matter of minutes.

"Good, so am I" Anders laughed, "Addie, some ale if you'd please, lovely".

The elf blushed intensely, her cheeks marooned as she gathered the pints.

Nathaniel; sitting adjacent to Alistair raised an eyebrow to the empty bowl, a frown of disgust painted upon his face, Alistair took pride in this.

"You'll understand it soon enough", He burped, leaning back satisfied with this new feeling of full.

"I now know where the infatuation started," Nathaniel mocked, keeping his attention of the bowl in front of him. Alistair did not let the remark phase him, it would not be the worst he'd hear upon his return, a pint of frothy ale was placed in front of him.

"I could give you a pointer", Alistair's lips curled into a malicious smirk, "I mean, If you ever hope anything will progress with our new elven companion".

"That is..." Nathaniel was left speechless, "That is...nonsense...I'm going to bed". He stood abruptly, Alistair could not contain his laughter, waving as he exited the room.

"Don't mind him, he's still a bit _fussy_" Anders giggled the word, "You know after his house being taken over 'n' all". The mage slurped down his drink, holding the cup up for another.

Alistair thought no more of the Howe's than he did cockroaches, a blood line that knew nothing more than to make the next higher up happy, he could not grasp why Kallian let him join the Wardens.

"So, Alistair, I hear you were once a templar".

"I was training to be, I hear you were once an apostate" Alistair cut to the chase, finding no humor in the subject, he took a swig. Watching Anders squirm slightly, he ran hands through his blonde hair, and adjusted his robes. "I have no further ties to the Chantry, and no ill will with you, so let us drink, as friends would".

Anders nodded, taking a sip of the pint that was just dropped off, he obviously did not like being beat at his own game. They drank in silence for a moment, but after another pint, or two, or five, the stories began.

"_How_ many times have you tried to escape?" Alistair slurred, not believing this mage's will to be free.

"Not _tried,_ I have escaped, it's just staying that way has been a problem, seven, no...eight..." Anders placed his hand on his chin, deeply thinking. "Oh I don't know, the point is I am now a free mage, thanks to our lovely leader!"

Alistair quieted to this point, it was not the thought that Kallian was lovely, he knew that point quite well, it was the words he might utter in his inebriated state that caused him pause.

"I have known the Commander a short time, but this I know, she is not without compassion." Anders sat straight up, "On the contrary, she is probably the most compassionate person I know, which comes as a surprise really..." he trailed off.

"Why's that?", Alistair raised an eyebrow, curious to the mages response.

"Well...I mean, look at all shes been through" Anders hiccuped, "I have heard of the trials and tribulations of the hero of Ferelden long before I met her, I know mages...good- mages who've turned maleficarum for less".

Alistair tilted his glass up, eagerly consuming the remains, his vision blurred slightly.

"We could both take note from Kallian," Anders leaned on the table, his forehead pressed down on the wood, as he tried to stop the world from spinning.

"Well said Anders".

A voice from behind caused them both to jump, Alistair turned around; to see Teagan standing in the door way. The men stood to attention, Anders nearly flipped the table, as it caught onto his robe. Alistair's vision began to clear, he had not noticed the elven cook was long gone, the hearth was out, the ale all gone.

"Would you please excuse us, Anders?" Teagan moved from his position in the door way, gesturing out the door as he did so, all the while his eyes were locked on Alistair.

"Of course, my lord" Anders bowed his head before exiting the room, taking one apologetic look back at Alistair before shuffling off.

"Good to see you're keeping up your spirits", Teagan glared into him.

"Teagan, I..." Alistair began.

"Why are you here?"

Alistair stood taken a back, he was not expecting the bluntness of Teagan's words. He crossed his arms as Alistair looked for the words.

"Kallian came to find me...she said she needed help"

"No, that is not my question, why are you back?", Teagan raised his voice now, his unkempt hair was grayed around the edges, crows feet had made there way to the corners of his eyes. His mottled brown eyes, flared red with anger.

"I...I don't know", Alistair looked to the floor, feeling like the ten year old boy being scorned for playing in the larder again. "I came back...to see her...to make sure she was okay".

Teagan was unmoved by the sentiment, his brow furrowed further.

"I want you to help Kallian with what ever it is she has recruited you for, then..." Teagan paused, "I want you gone, or so help me Alistair...am I clear?"

Alistair nodded, taking a slight amusement in the Bann's threat, he had known Teagan a very long time, never had he been good at the intimidation factor.

As Teagan turned to leave, Alistair called out after him, "I am clear on the fact that is what you would like Teagan, just as you should be clear, I am in no business of pleasing nobles".

"It is not your decision in the end, and this threat you are trying to make, will only make Kallian resent you all the same. So Teagan make your threats, and I will make mine; as long as she still calls me to her side, I will be here".

With that Alistair strode from the room, leaving Teagan in a quickly darkening kitchen, unwilling to watch the damage his words might have caused. The ale made him bold, though he had masked his true intoxication at this point, his feet clinked as he stumbled down the hall. Looking for the door he knew he shouldn't.

He didn't know for sure it was her's, but he pounded on it, he hit the wood with his fist so any occupant inside would be sure to hear him. He heard foot steps on the ground, approach the door, and a hand pause at the knob. He waited a moment before it slowly crept open.

Green eye's met his hazel.

"Alistair?" Kallian stood in a night gown in the doorway, her hearth still lite, the glow penning her features perfectly. Alistair moved to lean slyly again the door frame with what he hoped was a sultry grin, only to miss the frame completely, barreling to her feet, the clash of his armor against stone was slightly muted by the fur rug.

"Oh maker," Alistair heard a increasingly distant voice sigh, he could feel his body moving, just as an ale induced coma took him.


	14. Rumor has it

**A/N: **_Hey guys! This chapter was a bit more frustrating to write so I really wanna thank Bonkzy for all the help, even though she had a million other things going on! _

_Trying to keep true with the rapid updates, and reviews and such really help with the writing process. Other than that enjoy! Bioware owns everything._

Kallian kept her attention to the floor, gingerly chewing on the inside of her lip, as she tried to make sense out of what had just happened. She re-played the sequence of events in her head before deciding; _sod it_. She starred to the fur rug that contained a nearly unconscious Alistair, he rolled causing his armor to clink together and slurred some words she could not decipher. She peaked her head out the door to make sure the coast was clear, before cautiously sliding it shut.

Kallian placed her hands on her hips, unsure of what her next move should be: _call Anders in for help_?

_'He's probably the culprit of this', _she thought angrily. A chill ran down her spine, her thin night gown did nothing for warmth, she pulled her robe down off the banister. Tying is tightly around her waist, she decided she could at least remove his armor, it clinked with every move he made. She pulled him up by his shoulders, un-clasping his breastplate, and removing his gauntlets. The chain mail around his waist jingled as a chyme as it slid it off. Her fingers delicately grazing the skin of his torso, a spark of warmth sent her hand jolting back.

_'Keeping his clothes on', _she stated to herself, pushing her long chocolate waves behind her ears and hooking her hands beneath his armpits. Attempts to heave him towards the bed seemed futile, as he had gone almost completely dead weight. _Maker, he was heavy_. Occasionally moaning some word she didn't know if she was meant understand.

"K..Kali!", he slurred.

"Hush, you're going to get me in trouble," she ordered, giving up at the foot of the bed, letting him drop to the floor with an "Oopmh". Annoyed-she pulled a pillow and blanket from the bed, placing the pillow beneath under his head, and squatting down next to him to throw the blanket across his body. Alistair threw his arm out and reached out; slowly running his palm along her cheek. She instinctively snapped her hand up-placing it on top of his. The skin was rough, but comforting all at the same time.

He smiled through half closed eyes; she wrapped her fingers around his hand, squeezing for a moment as they lingered in this stasis. A fire warmed in her heart, pumping blood rapidly through her veins, as his thumb stroked her cheek bone.

He tugged slightly, trying to draw her in for a kiss, and she had almost let him. The thoughts of his arms around her flew through her mind, squeezing tight as her head would rest upon the crook of his neck, the last place she remembered feeling completely safe. The smell of ale was what first made her pull back to the cold, it seeped from his skin, and caused her stomach to churn. It was this that made her think upon what a mistake this could present, how would kissing a drunk past lover ease her situation?

She pulled his hand from her face, it left a cold void in its wake. Alistair hardly noticed; snoring now upon her floor. Reaffirming the decision she made was the right one.

Her eye's ached, she pinched the bridge of her nose as she walked to the plush chair by her fire place, it flickered dimly as she sat. Kallian curled her legs up, intending to rest her eyes for but a moment. She must have dozed off.

A rapid tapping on her door jerked her awake, propping her elbow upon the back of the chair, her eyes blurred and nothing about the room was familiar. The room was light an early morning haze, painting the furniture bright yellow, as the birds chirped outside her window. Kallian's neck ached as she stood from the chair. Tightening her robe she walked to the door, and placed her hand upon the knob.

A snort from behind her sent a feeling of dread throughout her body.

She looked over her shoulder to find Alistair, still asleep on her floor; his shirt had mysteriously disappeared. The door handle began to rattle, Kallian panicked, clenching her grip on the knob.

_'You have defeated a blight!', _she reassured herself, _' you can handle this'._

She cracked open the door, only to be blinded by red hair, and narrowed eyebrows.

"Where have you been?" Leliana demanded, "you were supposed to meet Nathaniel and I in the courtyard at dawn to work on your archery".

A mixture of relief and annoyance gripped Kallian. She hastily grabbed Leliana's elbow and pulled her into the room, the bard's objection died on her lips as she noticed the sleeping warden on her floor.

"Kallian Cousland!", she started again, but Kallian grabbed her by the elbow again. Looking around the room only to pull her into the walk-in closet adjacent to them. It was full of extravagant gowns and house dresses she would never wear, and a shoe collection that caused her Orlesian counterparts eyes to grow wide. Leliana had to squander the giddy squeal and return to her glare.

"Why is he here?", Leliana hissed through her teeth.

"I don't know!" Kallian mouthed, running her fingers through her ratted hair.

Leliana did not respond, only arched her eyebrow, and dramatically tapped her foot. Relentlessly starring Kallian down.

"I found him in Amaranthine... I was going to tell you about i-"

"No, why is he in your chambers?" her whisper was on the verge of threatening.

"I am not sure, he showed up at my chambers last night, what was I to do? Call Teagan to help me remove him?", Kallian squirmed, doing her best to avoid the bards glare. Leliana was at a loss for words, her brow furrowed further. Kallian attempted her sweetest smile, unsure of what- else to say.

"Nothing happened then?", the bard finally spit out.

Kallian mocked an appalled look, "No! Of course not, I am an engaged woman".

"Oh do not use that excuse on me, Kallian Cousland!" Leliana smacked her arm lightly, "You forget that I have known you, since you've known..._that_!" she gestured to the other side of the closet door.

"No, Lel, I promise", Kallian looked to her feet.

"Alright", Leliana smoothed her dress, finally allowing herself to observe the closet around her. Kallian dared not move an inch as her friend picked through the rows of dresses. Occasionally looking up to her before shaking her head. After a few moments she decided on a dark blue house dress, the bodice containing lighter blue detailing, and a floor length skirt. Leliana unwillingly handed the dress over.

"Put this on and come down for breakfast, your fiance will be waiting".

Kallian stuck her tongue out at her as they exited the closet. Leliana smirked at the immaturity. Kallian was often considered 'wise beyond her years', and she enjoyed Leliana's ability to make her feel her age again.

Leliana strutted over to Alistair, her red hair boucing as she skipped. She coughed with a purpose before nudging him lightly with her foot, "Hello! Wake up...time to move along".

Kallian couldn't help but giggle at this sight, Alistair did not budge, not until Leliana delivered a good kick to the ribs. His head popped up with a wheeze, squinting in the light, he flipped over rubbing his face with his hands. His hair a golden blaze in the morning light.

Kallian avoided making glances at his naked upper body, still cut in a stone like fashion, Kallian found herself biting the inside of her lip again. She flashed back to the night at camp, but only for a moment before correcting herself.

"C'mon, get up", Leliana was obviously having fun with this, she nudged again.

"Hello Leliana, it is good to see you again as well", Alistair moaned from the floor, hands still muffling his words.

"Time for pleasantries is over, my friend", Leliana laughed, "Now get out, Kallian needs to dress, you have already made her late".

Alistair sat up at this, apparently not remembering where he ended up last night, or what had happened to his shirt. He looked to Kallian. "You didn't take advantage of me, did you?".

"Hardly," she huffed, stepping back into the closet, she removed her robe and night gown. Pulling the dress over her head, it was far more comfortable that it appeared. Re-emerging from the closet, Alistair now stood before her, collecting the armor she had removed. He paused for a moment, examining her closely. A grin broke out across his face.

"What?" Kallian demanded, not trusting that smile for one second. Goosebumps rouse on her arms making her wish the dress had long sleeves.

"It's a very nice dress."

"Oh...I love it! Why do you never wear any of these pretty things?" Leliana rushed over, helping Kallian pull her hair back into a braid. Kallian remained silent, watching as Alistair reattained his possessions and moved to the door. He turned back to look at Kallian, the smile still plastered upon his faced.

It was hard to control the blush, the blood rushed to her cheeks and ears. Alistair opened the door and exited without a word, leaving the lingering smile upon Kallian's mind. Leliana noticing the blush, smacked her arm again.

They had finally made their way to breakfast, the two women walking side by side, giggling about what had just happened. Kallian could hear the faint sound of arguing. _'Maker, already?'_she thought quickening her step.

The voices became clearer. "But...she has only just arrived back." Teagan said, almost in a whine of a tone. Kallian rounded the corner, slowing to find it was only Teagan and Nathaniel involved in the conversation.

"I am aware of that, my lord, but she has more responsibilities than being your _arm_piece" Nathaniel spat, standing from his spot at the long table.

She searched for Alistair, an empty chair sat next to Anders, she released a breath she had not realized she was holding. When she heard the argument; she immediately assumed it was between Teagan and Alistair.

"Gentlemen," She kept her voice coy as she entered the room. "I am here now, Teagan, what is the problem?"

"They are saying you must go again..." he began, but was almost immediately cut off by Nathaniel.

"Commander, we really must be looking into Kristoff." He said, "it has been weeks since his last correspondence, I am beginning to wonder what will be left to find."

Nathaniel had a way of making every thing he said sound grim and dim.

"That is true." she walked to the table, placing her hands upon the back of a chair. "We will leave as soon as the equipment can be packed, Nathaniel, I need you to go to the library; find as many maps as you can on this...Black-marsh."

"That sounds rather fun, doesn't it?" Anders piped up from next to Nathaniel. "Black-marsh, Ooooh." he waved his hands throughout the air, wiggling his fingers at a bemused Velanna. The elf arched an eyebrow toward the man. "Shem's" she mumbled under her breath, as she spooned more porridge into her mouth.

Kallian rolled her eyes, suppressing a smirk.

Teagan had strode over to her side, pulling her closer to the door, speaking in a hushed tone."I really do not like this, you are missing for a fortnight, then at the next whim you are ready to gallivant off again."

Kallian felt a rumble in her chest, annoyed at this sentiment. "Teagan, you knew this about me when you asked for my hand. I am not some wall flower that waits for her husband to return from court."

Teagan narrowed his gaze, "I have never asked for such, I am just slightly baffled on why a smaller party cannot handle these matters."

"Because Teagan, I am a the _Commander_of the Grey Wardens" she emphasized the word, "what has provoked this? You never seemed to mind my duties before this."

Alistair entered the room, sliding past the arguing couple, as they blocked the doorway. He passed behind Kallian, placing his hand delicately on her shoulder, in an act to move her from his way. Teagan did not let the maroon that flushed her face go unnoticed.

"You wish to know why I am uneasy?" He scowled at Alistair, "That is why!"

Kallian just looked to Teagan, hoping that the incredulous feeling would show through.

"I cannot halt my duties just because you feel a threat to your masculinity."

the words slipped out far more sour than she intended, Teagan staggered back for a moment as if struck. The look upon his face made her reel in her words, but she moved herself to seem taller, standing her ground.

Thoughts of her mother rifled through her mind, stirring a wind of emotion she did not wish to confront. _Mind your temper, girl. _The Teryna would remind her daughter of this on an almost daily basis. Kallian had always been her fathers daughter, her mother would claim it drove her to whits end. Watching as her only daughter ran around after the other children with a wooden sword, rather that sit with Delilah Howe and prattle on about useless non-sense.

Kallian could not help but feel like the stubborn child her mother warned her against now. She returned Teagan's glare as he chided her.

"Fine, though that is never what I had suggested, I shall no further halt you from your duties. I only hope that you will return in time for the Queen's birthday." He replied to the tort, a pensive look still upon his face.

_Ah Maker!_Kallian had completely let her invitation to the Queen's birthday gala flee her memory. It was rapidly approaching, and as much as she despised these events, her status required her attendance. Kallian fidgeted with her skirt, taking her view away from Teagan's pleading eyes.

"Of course, I have another fortnight, do I not?" Her tone was icy, fully displaying the short attention span she held for the subject.

Kallian ignored the sigh of relief Teagan released. Accepting his embrace reluctantly, was this the future she was in for? She had hardly agreed to a life behind stone walls, waiting in an longing fashion for her husband to return.

Kallian had wished him farewell, a light kiss upon her cheek before he turned and promptly left the room, not turning to wish any of the others luck in their journey. She gripped the bridge of her nose-a headache was not far behind as she turned to her companions, all eagerly awaiting her command.

"Leliana, please inform Varel that we intend on departing as soon as the horses are saddled, I must change from this blasted dress."


	15. The First

**A/N:** _Thanks to all my dedicated readers! I love seeing story alerts and reviews from you guys, and I am glad that so many enjoy my story. I have the next couple chapters plotted out already so expect quick updates. Enjoy!_

_PS: Something special to the fan that can find "The Stolen Throne" reference!_

**Chapter 14**

Days of rain had made the road a mess, wind knocked over trees, and everybody in the party had mud up to their hips. Alistair; _(who had a knack for falling off horses),_ had it up to his forehead. It was the one smile he was able to break out of Kallian upon their departure from the keep, she had been in a foul mood since her conversation with Teagan in the dining hall. Avoiding the concerned glances of Leliana, she stayed toward the head of the pack, only stopping to consult with Nathaniel and his damned maps.

Alistair could feel the mud drying in the cracks of his armor, and though the rain had momentarily ceased—the winds continued to blow vigorously at his face drying the mud quicker.

The scenery around them began to change, the tree looking more gnarled and black containing no leaves, the foliage became scarce and was replaced with grim looking ponds. It was when they noticed the birds no longer chirped; the horses refused to go any further. They bucked and stomped their hooves, neighing loud disagreements. Forced to dismount the party continued on foot.

The sky had darkened to a deep purple quickly and a chill settled over them, a thick fog rolled around their ankles, making every step a guess. The party stayed eerily silent upon drawing closer to the marsh, everyone kept their weapons close at hand as they scanned the terrain, Alistair could barely make out anything more than ten feet in front of him.

Wolves howled in the distance, causing the hair on the back of his neck to stand up, it almost felt as if something was watching them. A pair of eyes unseen, following the group through the darkness. As the forest cleared, a sign became visible:

_'Beware! The Black-marsh is haunted'_

Nathaniel was the first the break the silence, "They say this marsh was once inhabited, until one day everyone just...disappeared."

"I'm scared...hold me," Anders piped up from behind him, doing his best to make it seem like a joke.

"Oh please, could you both at least _try_ to act like men" Leliana pushed past them to join Kallian, surveying the path in front of them. Alistair spotted the pack of wolves, a mere 50 yards a head of them, feasting on the carcass of something long dead. He drew his sword, hoping the sound would not alarm the pack. It was too late.

It was only five or six of them, but they quickly surrounded the group, snarling as they circled. A larger wolf appeared from the rear of the pack, lunging for Kallian with a howl. Alistair could almost see a smirk on her face as the hound bounded for her. She moved so quickly all he could see was a blur of brown hair spinning out of the way of the gray wolf, with such a grace; he almost mistook the battle for a dance.

The group and the pack were so consumed with this battle that they had almost forgotten about each other, each snapping back to attention with a growl. The wolves charged, more seemed to have appeared from no where, leaving the fight two on one. Alistair could barely pay attention to the happenings around him, confronted with two wolves in front of him. He gripped his shield tighter—plowing the first wolf with a squeal. The other hesitated now, digging it's paw deeper into the soft earth, snapping at Alistair's ankle. He kicked it in the muzzle with an armored boot, a whine sounded out as it stumbled backward. It shook it's head, continuing to move away, before turning and running off into the fog with a few of the surviving pack members.

Alistair surveyed his companions, they all looked to be unharmed, Leliana pulling an arrow from the body of a small black wolf. Nathaniel was helping Anders up, who had some how fallen backward into one of the dreary looking ponds, a rather displeased look upon the mages face as Velanna laughed. A snarl to the side drew their attention back to Kallian.

She and the great wolf still deep in combat, the wolf's fur was matted with dirt—blood dripped from it's side. It took another lunge at her, knocking Kallian to the ground, Alistair could hear the air being knocked from her lungs. He rushed forward to help her, but she had already plunged a dagger deep into the wolf's neck. With a final whine, it collapsed on top of her, she let out a sigh of relief as her head hit the ground with a soggy thud.

It was only a matter of seconds before Alistair and Leliana reached her side, pushing the animal off, she did not immediately get up. Just sank into the mud, as rain drops began to fall, chipping away at the dirt and blood that caked her face. She didn't say a word, just kept her eyes on the black sky, breathing evenly with the wind.

"Leliana, could you give us a moment?" Alistair stepped forward, boots sinking as he did.

"But I..." The bard opened her mouth to object, silenced by Alistair's glare.

"Lel, It's fine" Kallian blurted from the ground, her voice jagged like sand paper.

"Fine, I will take the others in search of Kristoff" Leliana starred down at Kallian, rain fell quicker now, her breath coming out in plumes.

After the others left Alistair crouched down next to Kallian, "You know, this is a great way to catch a cold...or maybe camouflage yourself."

Kallian laughed heartily, it came from her stomach and reverberated from her chest; her eyes not revealing any joy. She raised her hands to wipe the muck from her forehead, only to find they were covered in dirt as well—making it a moot point. She pulled them away, balling her hands into fists and slamming them into the mud with an exacerbated sigh.

"Alistair...what am I doing?"

"Is this a trick question?" He replied, raising an eyebrow.

"No, I just don't know how I got _here._" She finally sat up, the body of the wolf was steaming beside her as the rain washed away the blood. She looked impossibly small on the ground, she was thinner now than he recalled. Her head hung and drops of water dripped from her nose—by the sound of her voice; it was almost as if she were crying.

"How am I to do anything other than fight? It is all I know how to do. How am I to be a wife?...You come to value things, you come to _love _things and what happens?" She looked up, green met hazel, his heart skipped a beat. "You lose them."

"Kali I—" he paused, lifting loose hair from her face, blood dribbled as a crimson stream from a cut above her left eyebrow. There was hardly any words he could say now, that he hasn't already repeated in his mind a thousand times, any form of sorry that would make up for the pain he put her through. She may not have meant for it to be directed at him, but with her eyes connected to his, it was impossible for him to think otherwise. They sat in the mud for sometime, just starring absently at one another, his arms some how found themselves draped around her shoulders. Pulling her into his chest, his chin resting upon the top of her head, hardly thinking about the tingling feeling that now erupted in his skull.

"Ahem—Commander, I think we found him." Ander's voice sounded from behind them, causing Alistair to jump to his feet, and offer a hand to help Kallian up. She avoided his gaze, quick to follow Anders across the marsh.

_Stupid _Alistair wanted to kick himself, as he sheathed his sword, and jogged to catch up to them.

It was a clearing, slopes lead into it, and in the middle crouched Leliana inspecting a long gone body, already in the early stages of decomposition. His head still tingled a fit could not shake. Kallian approached cautiously, dagger from the wolf still in hand, as Nathaniel turned to her and shook his head. His eye's became wide as he faced the path, foot steps sounded behind them.

Alistair spun around, greeted by a darkspawn in silver chain-mail. Alistair felt his mouth hang open, he remembered Kallian describing "The Withered", but he could hardly fathom this. Darkspawn scavenged armor and weapons from the deep road, long left behind by dwarfs and any other unfortunate soul to perish down there. This one had armor that seemed to be crafted for it, carrying a great sword across it's back, with no chips to the steel or rust collection around the hilt. A red cloaked draped his shoulders, and it's eyes were framed by a tattoo, it still portrayed the decaying features of a darkspawn. Shrieks and other larva looking creatures followed it. Chills ran up his spine when he heard the deep voice, like gravel, pointing toward the body..

"Yes, that is your Grey Warden." It only acknowledged Kallian's presence, looking directly at her as it spoke through jagged teeth. It continued to approach her, ignoring Alistair stepping toward her side, drawing his blade. "The mother told me that if he were lured to this place, and slain, that in time _you_ would come. And the mother was right, she is always right."

It raised it's arms in praise, as if calling out to this _mother_, as if she could hear him from here. Kallian lowered her dagger, correcting her posture before replying.

"Who is this mother?" Kallian almost had to shout over the storm, though the darkspawn stood merely four feet in front of her.

"The mother is she who sent me, she that wished you to come. To here, this place. I...here before you am the First". It placed it's gnarled hand upon it's chest, as a sign of ownership. "And I am bringing to you, a message".

"What is your message, creature?" Kallian sneered.

"The mother, she is not permitting you further _his _plan, whether this you know or not. So she is sending you a gift." It's voice got lower, raising it's arm and summoning a black ball of smoke, it quickly turned a blinding green. The group shielded it's eyes, as the darkspawn laughed.

Winds picked up around them, Alistair felt his feet come out from under him, landing hard on his back and knocking the wind out of him. Another burst of green light surrounded them before the air grew calm, Alistair felt sick to his stomach. A strange haze shadowed the land now. As they rose to their feet, they saw the First still stood before them. A look of panic spread across it's face.

"NO! We have come to the fade as well, it cannot be this!" It stumbled around, searching to area, before turning back to Kallian.

"This is the fade? How did we get here?" Leliana stepped forward with a snarl. Her bow aimed for it's head.

"The mother, she has deceived me! I am betrayed", It cried out. "Now I am trapped In the fade with you...Ah! I am the fool"

"Looks like someone was considered expendable," Anders called out next, The First glared at him.

"I am the First! I am not being expendable! both the Grey Warden and the mother will be learning this." It growled, slowly stepping back. "I will be leaving you to the children. I will be finding my own way back to the world! Back to the mother!"

As it turned to leave, the larva creatures that followed it in, slithered forward. Only being two of them made for an easy battle. Leliana was the first to sink an arrow in the larva, Kallian stepping forward and slicing it down the side.

The First was not longer in sight, this world still resembled the black-marsh, only as if it were covered by a smoke screen.

"Well...what now," He turned to Kallian, a murderous look in her eyes.

"We find a way out, and if the Maker permits, I take the Firsts head back to this _mother_".


	16. The Blackmarsh undying

**A/N: **_So this is one of my longer chapters, and it's a lot more game script than i normally do. This was a hate/love chapter to write cause the Black-marsh is one of my fav quests, but as you will be able to tell Justice is one of my least favorite characters ever! especially after the DA2 thing. But i hope you like it. Please review and enjoy :)__  
_

__**Chapter Fifteen**

_The music surrounded her with warmth, clapping her hands excitedly as Zevran hooked a very irate looking Morrigan and spun her in the circle, before she pushed him away with a huff. A few of the Dalish who had joined their party brought instruments with them, a lute and psaltery and even a recorder. _

_Kallian scanned the camp, seeing a smile on almost all faces; with the exception of Morrigan. Who after Zevran's attempt to make her dance had scrambled away to her fire, sending sore glare toward all the joyous people. There was no reasoning behind the celebration, just for a moment they could forget the darkspawn, and the blight that was ravaging the land. _

_They did not care their armor was covered with blood, that many stood bandaged and bruised, weapons still at the ready. They could forget all those they had lost—for just a moment. _

_Sten and Oghren compared scars off to the side, a case of ale in front of them, already quickly decreasing. Wynne sat closer to the fire—next to the traveling dwarf Boghdan, both laughing heartily as they watched his son Sandal wrestle with Kallian's marbari._

_Zevran now had Leliana on his arm, spinning the bard around while she howled with joy, they hopped and skipped around the fire until they were red and out of breath. He pulled her in close, whispering something into her ear that caused Leliana to throw her head back with a giggle, twirling away from him and toward the lute player. Her red hair ignited by the glow of the flame, she leaned down and whispered something, the musician only responded with a grin—passing the message on to the other elves. _

_Everything grew quiet as the strings were plucked, slowed as if by a charm, frozen by the music. Leliana began to sing—the notes slide past Kallian's ears like silk, she closed her eyes and curled the edges of her lips. Just taking in the calm. _

_She could feel him before she even opened her eyes, his presence sent a tingle up her spine, causing her smirk to break out into a full out grin. He cleared his throat, Kallian snapped her eyes open—looking upon Alistair as he stood in front of her. After months on the road, nothing they owned could be rid of the dirt stains, though she loved it all the more. His tunic once white; had brown patches all over it, his leggings none better. His smile though, was still as white as the day they had met, it beamed on his face as he offered a hand. _

_Kallian placed her hand in his, letting him pull her from the ground effortlessly, her heart all but melted when their gaze met. His arm snaked around her waist, he pulled her body into his, humming along to Leliana's song. Kallian rested her head on his should, he placed his hand upon the back of her neck, holding her in a deep embrace she never wished to leave. _

_He lowered his mouth to her ear, "You make me crazy, like my head will soon explode."_

"_This is leading toward a compliment I hope?" Kallian laughed, pulling away to look upon his face. His eyes were worried as they searched her face, he stopped short, exhaling slowly while everything around them disappeared. In this moment it was just Kallian and Alistair, nothing else mattered. _

"_I love you..." the words crossed his lips in almost a whisper, "I've...I've never said that before, I've never felt this before. And suddenly all I can see is you, that is why you make me crazy Lady Cousland, and I would have It no other way." _

"_And I you, Alistair. It must be love, you drive me absolutely bonkers." A large toothy grin spanned across her face, as he pulled her close again, placing a delicate kiss upon her forehead as they swayed to the music. _

"Halt! Who enters the black-marsh?"

Kallian is pulled from her mind, an odd time for such a memory, heat emanates across her cheeks. Spreading a rosy color to her pale complexion.

A young man approached the group as they enter the town, his face covered by a large helm, and dulled splintmail. Kallian notices him raise a mace as they walked, she motions for the group to stop, before lowering her sword. They have faced several shades and demons upon entry to the fade, this seemed like neither of those.

"Ugh, this isn't still the black-marsh is it?" Alistair groaned, dodging a elbow to the ribs by Leliana.

Kallian sheathed her sword, and cleared her throat. "We are Grey Wardens, trapped here."

"Trapped?" He raised an eyebrow, lowering his mace. "Then you're just as we are, locked in this endless nightmare. We have been here so long at _her_ mercy, I almost forget what it was like, before. There is a spirit that's come to free us. Perhaps you could help him?" He pleaded, his voice sounded almost hopeful for a moment, before the solemn look of reality set in. "If only that were possible..."

He turned without a word, returning to his post with a sigh. Kallian could see forgotten souls just like him, wandering the streets beyond the gate, fighting unseen forces—crying out to no one.

"Is this the fate we will face, lest we find this _her_?" Velanna asked, a glare of disgust upon her face as they passed the spirit of a crying woman.

"She took my baby! The baroness! She took my child for her..._blood magic!" _The women cried, reaching out as Velanna retracted, knocking into another villager.

"I'll tell them, I'll tell them all!" he cried.

What was happening here? Everyone seemed stark raving mad, speaking to walls, crying out to those who were no longer there. Kallian kept her distance from the other villagers. They came upon a mob, standing in front of large iron gates, a voice came bellowing out from the center.

"This mansion will not protect you, _fiend_! Come out and face your crime!"

Anders sped up next to Kallian, "This must be the spirit of which the guard spoke, I sense no evil within him."

It's armor glowed, and voice sounded off more confident than any of these blithering souls, Kallian could see straight through it. His voice bellowed encouragement to the crowd around him, am-ping up the group with a silver tongue. Kallian did not feel the sense of curiosity that had sparked in Anders around this being, if anything his presence put her further on edge.

"That does not mean he can be trusted", she interjected, making her way toward the group.

A small red headed woman ran out in front of the spirit, "We are not afraid of you any longer!", she screamed. Turning to the crowd and raising her sword, "The witch hides! Break down the door."

"Be cautious, my friends. The baroness has power within her lair, and she knows it. We will rush in to our peril." The spirit raised it's hands, pleading the villagers to stop. He looked to Kallian, his helm blocking any face he may possess. "And who comes now? More of the baroness' minions? Or yet more helpless souls she has tormented?"

"Do I look like a helpless soul?" Kallian scoffed, the sarcasm lost upon the spirit as he awaited further introduction.

"We are Grey Wardens, brought here against our will." she said, out of the corner of her eye, she saw the red head approaching again.

"I cannot say what a "Grey Warden" is. But you are most definitely a stranger, perhaps that is a sign..." The spirit sighed, relaxing it's shoulders as it stepped closer to Kallian. "I am Justice. I have watched this place, and I have seen the wrongs visited on these poor folk, and now I seek to aid them."

"We once lived in the real world, the baroness ruled over us. She took our children and used their blood, for dark and evil magic." Tears rolled down the red heads cheeks, a man next to her placed a hand upon her shoulder.

"And when we burnt down her mansion, she cast one final spell bringing our spirits here. We have been trapped ever since, still under her rule." The man said, pulling the crying red head into an embrace, consoling her sobs.

"We have to help these people! It must be terrible being trapped in this gray, lifeless world." Leliana stomped her foot, her tone not conveying this to be a request.

"I think since the baroness is the one to have trapped these people, she is our best chance of getting out." Anders said, very matter a factually.

"Tell me stranger, will you help in this most righteous task?" The spirit petitioned, gesturing around to all the heart stricken spirits who littered the streets.

Kallian crossed her arms, looking to Alistair, who shrugged. That damned, 'whats the worst that could happen' look upon his face.

"We have no quarrel with this Baroness, I say we move along, and leave these people to their business." Velanna challenged, the hostility of her words met by a glare from the transparent spirit.

Kallian was none to eager to oblige a spirit in the fade, her past experiences in this blighted world made her response catch in her throat, she just stared Justice down as she nodded her head. Praying to the Maker this would not come back and bite her in the arse.

"Then we have the numbers to challenge the baroness directly!" Justice rejoiced.

"You waste our time with these...these cattle?" Velanna scowled, she reminded Kallian more and more of Morrigan with each passing day.

"This spirit knows this world, maybe he can lead us to a way out." Kallian's voice was barely above a whisper, knowing Velanna would hear her.

"Fine, I just hope you know what you are doing." Anger seethed behind narrowed eyes. This phrase was becoming far too common to Kallian's ears.

She rocked on her heels, watching uneasily as Justice spoke to the other spirits, he finally turned to them. "My intentions are to storm the gates, are you ready?"

"Oh boy, are we!" Anders hooted from behind him, pulling his staff from his back. Justice cocked his head at the mage, the sarcasm still not making it through his thick helm.

Kallian just rolled her eyes, pulling her dagger from it's sheath, "Let us get on with it."

"Good people!" Justice laughed, turning toward the gate, "Your crimes have gone on to long unpunished, for freedom!"

The spirit rushed the gate, landing a kick in the direct center of iron bars, they splintered open as wood. The crowd stood in awe, watching him make his way into a dreary courtyard, Kallian rushing behind.

A woman stood atop the stairs, dark hair pulled into a tight bun, and black eyes glaring as they approached. Her features hinted that she may have been beautiful once, though now she had been weathered away by dark magic. Crows feet circled her eyes—once porcelain skin was now faded and dull. She was quite tall, nearly meeting the height of the ash wraiths that stood on either side of her.

Her robes portrayed that of tevienter craft, a deep maroon, and the collar lined with fur. The wraiths snarled, she ran her fingers along the back of the one to her left, her crooked lips curling into a pernicious smirk.

"After all that noise outside you finally decide to barge in here uninvited?" Her tevienter accent breaking through the tense silence.

"Foul sorceress! You will release these poor folk to and submit yourself to justice!" The spirit bellowed.

"Ha..justice? Is that what we are calling it?" She slammed her hands into the bannister, "And what of them? What will be their punishment? Burning my home to the ground with me inside!"

The blithering man from before stepped forward, eyes enraged, "You were stealing our children! Using their blood to feed your _vanity_."

"As was my due, sir" she cackled, "You lived upon _my _lands, eating _my _crops, I was your rightful ruler! Their blood was mine, just as your lives are now."

The man coward back, looking to his feet, fighting invisible tears. Kallian felt an anger bubble within her, looking toward the towns people as they recoiled to the baronesses poisonous words, she did not fear this glorified _witch. _

"Their souls are yours no longer!" Kallian stepped forward, spitting venom of her own.

"What is this? Another sympathizer of these pathetic fools?" She raised a hand, gesturing a figure from behind her. "As it happens...I am no longer alone either".

The First took his place beside the baroness, her smile grew wider as she turned to the horde of people.

"My path across the veil lies in victory over you and your new allies, then the mother will pay for her treachery." he said, walking the length of the stairs, pulling his sword as he approached Kallian.

She tightened her grip on her dagger, "Well you have one thing right, the mother will be taken care off."

Releasing the blade with a delicate flick of her wrist, and landing it into the thigh of the first, he screeched in agony—blood flowing freely from the wound.

Shades ripped up from the ground; encircling the group with shrieks, the baroness still stood atop the staircase—unmoved by the impending battle.

Kallian was too distracted to return to the First right away, when the shades were left in steaming piles around them, she approached him. Spinning her sword in her hand as he scrambled, clutching the wound to his thigh, looking desperately to the baroness.

"You fool!" Her face twisted with rage, "why have you not yet defeated them?"

"They are too much. You must be sending me back through the veil, quickly before it is to late!"

"I will be sending them all back," she sneered, a green light rising from her palms. "But you- Your life will be providing the power!"

"No! No!" The first shrieked again, doing it's best to crawl away to no avail.

The bright green light swirled around them, just as before, they were all knocked to their backs before blackness surrounded them.

It was the cold nipping at her nose that caught her off guard, rain drops hit her face, sending chills through out her body. Was she dead? Kallian jumped to her feet, faltering slightly before regaining her footing. It was the real world again, the marsh surrounded them in it's mucky glory, the purple sky still above their heads. The party shuffled to their feet around her, finding it difficult to battle with the moist ground.

Kallian nearly jumped for joy, when Leliana's scream pierced her glory, she looked down to see the decomposing body of Kristoff surrounded by bright light. It moved, climbing to it's feet, and a dead face turned to stare at Kallian.

"Kristoff?" She asked cautiously, taking a hesitant step toward the body.

It stumbled backward, eyes sagging with confusion. "What...What is happening? Where am I?"

It paused, looking from Kallian toward the shaded village of the marsh, and back to Kallian. A realization dawned across it's decaying face. "No...This is the mortal world. Beyond the veil!" It looked down upon it's body, hands flocking to Kristoff's face, feeling around on the face that did not belong to this being.

"And this? A mortal flesh?...I am trapped within." It's head hung, disbelief finally removed from it's voice.

"Spirit?" Kallian asked, "But how?"

"That _witch _sundered the veil in her haste!" it snapped, causing Kallian to take a step back. "We were all drawn through. _She_ has returned to this realm as well. Can you not feel it?"

Kallian could only muster a shrug, not really sure what she was supposed to feel right now, but foot steps approaching answered his question. The baroness appeared around the bushes.

"So this is the world of mortals. How very dull it seems, immutable and unchanging." She grimaced, running her hand along a leaf, only to shake it off. She looked to Kallian, her frown deepened, "Ah, it seems I was not the only one to be drawn here. How very tiresome."

The baronesses body began to convulse, she screamed as her bones cracked, and her form changed. A large black figure now loomed over them, barring it's jagged teeth at them. After eons of sucking the life out of others, the baroness had finally succumbed to a demon of pride, and this is what stood before them.

It proved to be a worthy foe, though the party Kallian traveled with seemed to just be to much for it. It fell to the ground with a whimper, dying as any other foe would. Kallian pulled her sword from it's side, wincing at the gash it had created along her arm. It's razor sharp talons had split right through her drake scale gauntlets, leaving her wrist bleeding hastily, she could feel herself becoming woozy.

She dropped to her knees, the mud softening the blow, as Anders rushed to her side.

"By the maker Kallian...I will need a bigger bag with how often I need to heal you." Anders joked; clasping her wrist tightly, the skin quickly weaved together, still stained with blood when he released. She observed, a red puffed up scar still spanned from the base of her palm to her elbow, she raised an eyebrow to Anders.

"We have been in the fade for Maker knows how long. Give a mage a break."

She smiled, shaking her head, as she stood. Alistair was at her side now, a concerned look painted his face.

"I'm fine." She reassured him, patting his shoulder.

She walked toward Justice, who still seemed discontent with his new mortal form. Kristoff's face hung from his bones, dark circles encompassed his eyes, made only darker by his nearly white complexion. An unhealed laceration crossed his cheek, festering with infection, she suppressed a gag.

"It is done." He grieved, "It seems I cannot return to the fade. I am trapped here, in the body of this...Grey Warden?"

Kristoff's body seemed to be uncomfortable to him, he winced, as he rolled his head in a circular motion around his shoulders.

"There are memories in this poor mans mind. They are difficult to see, but...he was a Grey Warden? He was...slain by the darkspawn, the one they call the First?"

"Yes, he was a Grey Warden, Darkspawn are what we are fighting." Kallian responded, still disgusted with the being that stood in front of her. Kristoff did not deserve to have his body worn as a costume for a spirit, he deserved a proper burial, her opinion seemed to be better conveyed upon her face than she knew.

"It seems I am at a loss. I know nothing of this world, and only have a few memories from this Grey Warden to draw from. I do not wish to die. What do you suggest I do mortal? You seem a good judge of character." He straightened his stance, puffing his borrowed chest forward.

Kallian had to bite back her true opinion: _I suggest you evacuate this body, it is disrespectful, you mischievous fiend. _

Ander's saw the barbaric look in her eyes, "You could join us," he blurted, "The body you inhabit is that of a Warden, you maybe of some use."

The spirit mulled this thought over, placing a gnarled looking hand upon his chin, and staring at Kallian. She tried to do her best encouraging face—concealing her true vexation with the idea. Wandering around with a spirit of justice?

Something about him settled the wrong way with her; she wouldn't just blame it on his encamping this body. Anders had seemed to take a strange fascination with him, and after saving her from the brink of death more times than she could count. It seemed high time to trust his judgment. For now.

"Very well, I will join you Grey Warden. If you will allow it?"

"...I will" she hesitated, "What shall I call you? _Kristoff?_" the name slid out with a sense of abhorrence.

"No! That is not my name. I have no name, I am but a sense of virtue." The word seemed to set him with an idea. "If I am required a name, use that one, Justice. And I am pleased to travel at your side; _for now." _

He strode past her, leaving a sour taste in her mouth, as the smell of mildew passed her. Anders was quick at his heels, babbling with questions of the fade and beyond.

Alistair and Leliana joined her side, both laughing at some joke she had missed.

"Well...this should make Anora's birthday party even more interesting." Alistair's voice laced with tartness.

"Agh! Do I have to go?" Kallian sighed dramatically—throwing her head back fitfully.

"Yeeesss!" Leliana sang, dancing in circles around Kallian. "just think...beautiful dresses, and shoes, hair and make-up! You could finally be rid of dirt for an evening."

She stopped, catching a glimpse of Kallian's pestered face, "There will be endless amount of wine and ale."

"I don't know why you started with the other stuff." Kallian shrugged, Leliana began to dance down the path.

"Ah. And I was just going to go for the shoes." Alistair laughed as Kallian shoved him.

Frilly dresses, uncomfortable shoes, questioning nobles, and an angry Teagan? She would drag her feet the entire way to Denerim.


	17. O' brother

******A/N: **_So this chapter is a lot shorter than i normally do, but the segway __chapter felt necessary. Also this is the very rare occasion that i split POV in one chapter, again necessary. The Queens birthday will be coming out VERY soon i promise. Read, review and ENJOY :) _

**Chapter Sixteen**

**Kallian**

Denerim was hardly a city she enjoyed to visit, it's stone walls stood unwelcoming, it's nobles filled with the hustle of business. Especially with the Queen's birthday party to arrange, every merchant in town was busy with castle servants, hollering over pricing for cloth and food.

Kallian slide past a dwarf and an elf arguing over craft for decoration. She became increasingly more thankful that many of her party opted to make a camp just outside of city, and await her return. Justice and Velanna outright refused, while Nathaniel felt his presence would cause to much of a stir, he felt more comfortable in the shadows. Leliana, Alistair, and Anders remained by her side. Weaving through the busy market, toward her brother Fergus' estate, it was hard to miss the castle Cousland.

Fergus took great pride in the appearance of his estate's. Both this castle, and the once positioned in Highever were groomed and polished to perfection. They entered the large gates, walking through the courtyard, she smirked at her brothers predictability. The rose bushes stood plucked, and the cobble walk way had not a leaf in sight, a elven servant scrubbing the fountain in the center of the courtyard. He looked up to see his masters' bloodied and soiled approach, he squealed and stood to attention, bowing deeply before he spoke.

"My..My lady...the teyrn requested to be alerted the minute you arrive, Bann Teagan arrived only a few days ago." The elf stammered, eying her party cautiously, before running off to inform Fergus.

They came to the door, a hustling of feet could be hear from the other side, yells echoing through the stone halls.

"Well there goes my element of surprise," Kallian joked weakly, pulling open the great oak door.

Teryn Fergus Cousland was just entering through the large archway, Teagan in tow, both looking appalled at her appearance. Her brother looked different; face aged now, and dark brown hair grayed around the edges. He smiled as she came upon him, pulling her into a quick embrace, backing away with his hands still upon her shoulders.

"Ah sister, it has been far too long, I can see the time has been...kind to you." His sentiment plagued with insincerity.

"I could say the same to you, brother" she scoffed, "Is that gray I see?" She tussled his hair, no matter how far they climbed the social ladder, they were still siblings.

He laughed heartily, releasing her from his grip to slick his hair back down. He placed a well mannered kiss upon Leliana's hand, then turned toward Anders and Alistair.

"I see you've added a few new members to your band of misfits," he offered his hand, " Fergus Cousland, gentlemen."

"My lord, it is an honor." Anders bowed his head, looking nervously toward the guards that lined the walls.

"Fear not my ser mage, they travel with me whether I like it or not." Fergus beamed toward his armed guard, his gaze moving to Alistair. Kallian could feel her heart beat slow to a crawl as a stony look cross her brothers face, he did not offer his hand toward him, merely an icy glare.

"Alistair..." The Teryn said, "I was wondering if she'd bring _you_ here. Teagan had informed me of your return, I could scarcely believe it."

"It is good to see you my lord," Alistair lied, bowing his head. They remained in a irascible quiet, not breaking eye contact for a moment.

"I hardly thought hiding him away would make the situation any better, Fergus. If there is any problem I'd have you bring it to me." Kallian broke the tense silence, stepping in front of her companion, meeting her brothers glare.

"Well I'd hardly like our reunion to begin with a quarrel sister, I would just see that you keep your _company_ in check." His words laced with ire.

Kallian elbowed her brother, turning to greet Teagan.

"It is good to see you unharmed love, you made it back in the nick of time," he smiled, rounding Fergus and planting a kiss upon her forehead. "The party is tonight, you all must hurry to get ready."

He flicked an Alistair an irked look, "Anders and Alistair may go up to the guest chambers, a servant up there will have _appropriate_ attire for them. Leliana and yourself will have gowns to choose from in your quarters."

Leliana squealed at the mention of this, grabbing Kallian's hand and whipping her down the hall, she had only a moment to look back and see Alistair's uncomfortable sigh. She projected a look of apology, before Leliana pulled her out of sight.

Kallian hardly had a moment to object the torture the bard subjected her to. The moment they walked through the door; she was stripped of her armor and soiled clothing and thrown into a luke warm bath. She shivered the elven handmaid scrubbed away the days of travel, slowing down as she reached Kallian's various scars. Gasping in horror as she ran her frail fingers along the newest addition on her arm.

"We shall dress her in long sleeves," Leliana rolled her eyes, sinking further in to the bubbles of her adjacent tub.

They tugged at her knotted hair, pulled her in and out of dresses, and caked her face with more make up than she ever knew was available. Kallian grew even more irritable when they pulled forth a corset from the closet, narrowing her eyes at the elven servant, and stomping her foot in objection.

"No, Leliana, I have let this nonsense go on long enough. I am not some doll for your disposal." she pouted, crossing her arms.

Leliana just laughed, "If you are going to act as a child Kallian, I will treat you as a child."

Kallian kept her stance, staring down her friend with a look she reserved for the most dire of times. Leliana just sighed, waving away the corset, and pulling another dress from the pile.

**Alistair**

Alistair fidgeted at the bottom of the great stairs, this day had become increasingly more uncomfortable , and the formal wear he was forced into made it no better. He and Anders donned black wool breaches, white tights underneath, and fine leather shoes. They were given red and white tunics, branded with the seal of the queen in gold, a heavy black cloak rested upon their shoulders.

Fergus and Teagan stood nearby, dressed to a much higher standard than any Grey Warden should be accustom to. Fergus wore a dark maroon doublet, Teagan in dark blue; both had golden livery collars draped across their shoulders and chest.

Alistair kept his attention else where as the men chatted casually, he could not hear nor did he care what about, keeping his eye's to the top of the stairs. Anders had for once done a good job at keeping quiet, his eyes toward his leather shoes, kicking at the floor. The chatter had been cut short by the sound of heels, he could hear faint arguing around the corner.

"Will you stop acting as a child, it is just a dress..." The Orlesian hopped out from behind the wall, her red hair pulled back into a slick bun atop her head, set on fire by a green floor length gown. She continued to argue with what he could only assume was a stubborn Kallian behind the wall.

"Kallian Grace Cousland, we will be late if you keep this up." Fergus called up the stairs, using a stern voice that made even Alistair straighten up.

The first thing that became visible was a white heel, followed closely by a blushing Kallian, Alistair released a breath he was not aware he was holding. _Maker, she's beautiful. _

Kallian wore an elegant satin gown, the pale rose fabric complimenting her cream complexion perfectly, copper detailing webbed across the bodice. Her chocolate waves were pinned back into a half braid, leaving most of her hair cascading down her back. Her gaze met Alistair's, and the blush upon her cheeks grew darker, Teagan stepped forward—clearing his throat.

"You look gorgeous my dear, shall we be leaving?"

She stumbled slightly upon the descent, Leliana catching her elbow in the nick of time. Alistair felt it impossible to suppress the chuckle, silencing at the feeling of Fergus' scowl.

Teagan took her hand, placing it in the crook of his elbow, and lead her toward the door. Alistair grimaced as he saw Teagan whisper delicately into her ear, a smile spanning across her face.

Alistair faltered as they walked toward, a twinge of nausea spreading throughout his abdomen. Anders looked back, raising an eyebrow with a sense of puzzlement, only to follow Alistair's gaze. Anders shook his head and urged him forward. Coming into stride with the mage, Anders nudged his ribs again, jerking his chin forward. "You haven't lost yet."

Alistair looked ahead to Kallian again, only to find her sending him a glance over her shoulder. His heart stopped when green met hazel. He responded with a wide grin, she turned her head bashfully, trying to shake off the burn.

"Not even close."


	18. The Queen and I

**A/N: **_all hail the Queen. Even though she has a tendency to be a self righteous bitch!  
Read, Review and most importantly; ENJOY! :) _

Kallian searched for air beneath her tightening bodice, each step they took toward the main stairs into the great hall sent jitters down her spine, a bead of sweat rolled down her neck. She had become accustom to these traditions, one was never just allowed to enter a party, you must wait in line to be introduced. Kallian remembered being a little girl, and the few parties Fergus and herself had attended, she was shoved into a pretty dress and waited in line. Fergus had always had a more regal look about him, standing tall—chest puffed out, entering a party as if it were for him. He gained that trait from their father.

The thought of their late parents still brought sickening feeling in Kallian's gut. Her mother would be fretting about how she needed to stand up straighter, and comb her hair more, she would fuss endlessly about Kallian's bruises and scars. _"Leave the girl be, Eleanor."_ Bryce would laugh, pulling his daughter into his arms, _"she'll be able to take on any golem in Thedas at this rate." _

"Commander Kallian Cousland, of the Grey Wardens." The herald bellowed throughout the great hall, "Bann Teagan Guerrin, of Rainesfere."

She had grown so lost in her thoughts, she nearly tumbled down the stairs, thankful for Teagan's arm to keep her composed. How had they advanced so fast? They descended the stairs, immediately greeted by nobles, many of whom Kallian could not think of their names. Teagan eventually left her side, wandering off to find Eamon, someone Kallian would rather find her. Anders and Alistair stood behind her for the most the time, smirking mischievously at the quizzical looks they received—many wives asking where she had hired on such handsome guards.

Fergus was caught up in some conversation with the new Teryn of Gwaren; a stoutly fellow with a rather large mustache. He stood almost a head bellow Fergus, but had a voice that filled the halls. Kallian smirked, watching her brother wince at every word the man said.

A solitary horn sounded from the opening of the room, conversation was silenced as all turned towards the large doors.

"Her majesty, Anora Therin, Queen of Ferelden." The herald bellowed, his voice becoming ragged as the night wore on.

Anora stepped into sight, looking as a completely different person that she was the last time they had met. She wore a large cream dress, gold piping lined the bodice, the skirt spanning out beyond her hips. Her golden hair was pulled back into an elegant braid, and a simple crown sat atop her head. She smiled widely, proceeding down the stone steps, waving gracefully as she did so.

The band played a soft melody from the corner of the room, Teagan reappeared in front of her, offering his hand toward the dance floor. Kallian curtsied, placing her hand delicately over Teagan's, as he wrapped an arm around her waist. They danced in silence, he pulled her in closer, lowering his chin to rest upon her shoulder. They swayed in this despondent moment, Kallian pushed him away, hoping it to be subtle enough for no offense to be found.

He continued to spin her, his hands firmly planted on her waist, none the wiser to the space she had just created between them. She caught a glimpse of Alistair from over Teagan's shoulder, he posted himself against a far wall, nursing a mug of mead. A fire had been kindled in her stomach as their eye's met, longing over took her, she looked away quickly.

"Please do not act as if I am blind." Teagan whispered, looking over his shoulder towards Alistair.

"Teagan...I am not..." She stammered, taken a back by his bluntness.

"Do not take me as a fool, Kallian." He said taking a step backward, his hands moved to cup her hands. "Lady Cousland, from the first time I had laid eye's on you, I have been under your spell...nothing in this world would please me more than to know I had your unrequited love."

He shot another look to Alistair over his shoulder. "I am not under the impression that your feelings for him have diminished, I would just only hope that when the choice came down to it...you would remember who stayed."

Kallian stood before him, mouth dropping to the floor. Teagan released her hands, tilting her chin up with his, and placed a kiss upon her lips. He pulled away, his hand lingering on her chin, as he added a kiss to her forehead.

"I will be returning to Eamon's estate, I just require some time." He stepped back, squeezing her hand briefly before exiting the party.

Kallian stood in the center of the dance floor in a sense of agog, her hand still lingering in the position Teagan had let it fall. She made her way to the edge of the floor, Alistair and Anders waited for her there, both with raised eyebrows. She quickly waved away their inquiries, not entirely sure what had just happened herself, she hardly noticed the song had come to an end.

An applause erupted throughout the hall, Kallian sluggishly joined in, jutting out her elbow into Anders ribs. The mage coughed to attention, clapping his hands together a few times, then returning to staring at the Arlessa of Alamar's bust line.

Kallian moved to elbow him again, but Alistair's hand caught her, she turned around to see the Queen making her way toward them. A cross look garnished her face.

Kallian straightened up, plastering a false smile upon her face. "Your majesty, you look lovely."

Anora screeched to a halt just a foot before her, baring a dangerous look, that reminded Kallian why she had never quite trusted the young Queen.

"You have quite some nerve." Anora snarled in a hushed tone, grabbing on to Kallian's arm and pulling her away from peering eyes.

"I was about to wish you a happy birthday, but know I am not too sure," Kallian retorted, wrenching her arm free from Anora's iron grip.

"I don't know if you feel you have some form of diplomatic immunity, but bringing _him_ here, really?" She gestured fiercely in Alistair's direction. Kallian found a sense of amusement at watching the perfectly pieced Queen; coming undone.

"Diplomatic immunity? Of course not your majesty." Kallian took a snide tone, "but considering with out _him, _and myself, there would be no throne for you to sit upon."

"This better not be some ploy to regain it for him, he gave it all up when he left that landsmeet hall." She glared, her voice raising enough for Alistair to hear.

"Oh woah, woah." Alistair approached the women, his hands raised to admit submission. "You have no worries in that realm."

Anora shot daggers in his direction, "Well then why have you returned?"

Alistair staggered an answer, "I uh...well...I...she found me?"

His voice reached a high pitched that cause both women to raise an eyebrow. Kallian had still yet to receive a straight answer out of him, and was becoming increasingly annoyed with his bemusing responses. She pinched the bridge of her nose, listening to the Queen and the exiled prince squabble with details that really had no matter. Finally the rage bubbled up her throat in the form of word vomit.

"Enough!" both Alistair and Anora jumped, if they were determined to act in this adolescent manner, she would yell at them as the arguing children they were.

"He is here to help me with the matter _you_ asked me to take care of; and considering what I am dealing with to make sure _your_ kingdom remains unharmed—I would please just ask you to...back off!"

Kallian barely gave time for Anora to respond, she turned on her heel and marched to the doorway, leaving a confused group of nobles in her wake. She was past fed up with this party.

She had spanned the distance between the royal palace, and Cousland castle in record speed, her rage filling her every pained step. Kallian cursed these wicked shoes Leliana placed her in, kicking them off in a haste, preferring the feeling of the cool stone ground. She entered the large courtyard, the night was cool, and she began wishing she had thought to grab her cloak.

She stopped at the large fountain, the sound of booted feet not far behind her. Probably Fergus coming to scold her, for a temper she had still not learned to control. She let the footsteps come to a complete stop behind her before she turned, without her heels, her dress dragged against the ground.

It came as little surprise the he had come looking for her.

"Alistair, I just wish to be left alone." Kallian sighed, attempting to round past him.

"Kallian, I wanted..." he started, stepping in her path.

"You wanted what?"

Just looking at him made her heart erupt, she could feel the same anger bubbling in her chest as she had felt in the disgusting tavern in Amaranthine. He just continued to stare at her with those eyes.

"What do you want, Alistair?" She cried out, "It seems since the moment you came back you have been determined upon destroying my life."

She side stepped him again, heading toward the path that rounded the castle.

"I have been destroying _your _life?" Alistair gave chase. "You are unbelievable! First you put out notices for every guard in Thedas for me, then just when you are claiming to be happy, you embark on some fools worthy quest to bring me back."

They entered a side garden, a line of rose hedges bordering the large square of grass, it's comfort bringing relief to Kallian's aching feet. She spun around, the burning in her chest turning to a full out explosion.

"_Claiming_ to be happy, You accuse me of such? I have a life with Teagan now...I am to be married, I do not understand why you cannot wrap you mind around this. I have the happiness that you could not provide for me." Kallian cried out.

"You have no such thing." the note of disdain in his voice made her shudder, he kept his distance as he spoke. "That _man _will never feel the way I do about you, he will never understand you the way I do."

"The way you _did,_ Alistair, you do not know me anymore..." tears began to sear in the corners of her eyes, words catching in her throat. "It is too late, I cannot do _this_ anymore."

"Then why did you come for me?" his voice was low, he took a step toward her. "You could have left the rumors alone, you didn't need me to do this. Why did you come for me?"

She was left speechless, his voice raised as he stepped forward, his breath hot on her face now. _No! _She screamed in her head, _I will not let you hurt me again. _She turned abruptly, scooping up her shoes and speeding out of the garden. Kallian shoved through the doorway, bursting into the hallway at a light jog, trying to remember the way around this blasted castle.

She stumbled on the hem of her dress, cursing under her breath, and trying to regain her posture.

Alistair still hot on her heels, "What is it you are always running from? What has the Commander of the Grey Wardens so scared?"

She did her best to ignore him, dropping the shoes and grabbing the front of the damned dress that she kept tripping over. Kallian rounded another corner, seeing the door to her bed chamber at the end of this never ending hallway. The torches flickering as tears began to fall from her face.

She just needed to get to that door.

**A/N: **_sorry couldn't resist the cliff hanger :)_


	19. It isn't over

**A/N: **_So my shortest chapter yet, sorry hectic week and i really wanted to get this one out. This is my first time writing an intimate scene, so hope it was interesting enough. Read and review! and mainly ENJOY :)_

He starred at her back, it grew smaller and smaller as she bolted down the hallway, he had to think of something to stop her from going behind that door.

If she went behind the door, this conversation would be lost, and they would inevitably have to start at the beginning. Or, maker forbid, he would have to watch her wed. This was a feeling that spread nausea through his stomach, and goosebumps across his skin. He refused to ever watch that. Kallian had finally reached the door, raising her hand for the knob, it was now or never.

"You know exactly why I came back." He called out, in one last attempt to get her attention. It had worked. She faltered, pausing at the knob, but still not daring to look back. Alistair took another step forward, slowly gaining on her, as he tried to make sense of the ramblings in his mind. Everything he wanted to say. It was a conversation that had run through his thoughts since they returned from the Wending Wood, and now that it was here he had no idea what to say.

"But the question still remains," he took yet another step toward her—making his best attempt at being suave. "Why did you come for me?"

Kallian kept her back to him, her shoulders obviously tensing up, as he took another step closer. Alistair was now within reaching distance, the smell of lavender and vanilla emulated from her, he fought the urge to wrap his arms around her.

"I have told you already, I need your help with this." Her voice came off muffled against the wooden door, she still had not moved an inch, hand trained against the knob.

"No, I do not think that is true." He stated, a hint of annoyance escaping his lips.

"Well the fact of the matter is...it does not matter what you think is true or not, Alistair. And you claim that I know why you came back, for which I have no answer." Kallian sighed, exasperation coated her words.

"That is not true either."

"Then why di..." She spun around, her tone grew quiet at the note of his proximity. Kallian corrected her stance, a pensive look sparking on her face. "Then please..enlighten me."

"Because no matter where I venture, I still cannot get the thought of you out of my mind, I cannot get the smell of your hair out of my bed roll. I refuse to stop feeling like my head will explode when I am around you."

Kallian stared at him with those big green eyes, pursing her lips, as large tears rolled down her cheeks.

"I am so in love with you, that it is impossible for me to find happiness any where else. I would rather spend the rest of my days, arguing with you, than loving anyone else." Alistair raised a hand, wiping the water from her cheek. "And you came for me, because you feel the same."

They sat in a tense silence, Kallian kept her soggy stare blank, stray hairs falling in her face.

"If these feelings are not returned, tell me now and I will be..."

The feeling of her lips crushed against his caused him to stagger backward, he opened his eye's to make sure she was really there, Kallian pulled back seeking answers to his pause.

He smiled, placing a hand on the back of her neck, and pulling her in again—hard. Alistair let his other hand grasp at her back, pulling her body against his, as she flung her arms around his shoulders. Her taste filled his mouth, her warmth over whelmed his senses, he wanted nothing more than for this moment to last forever.

Kallian's hands ran up to his neck, her nails running through the hair at the nape of his neck, sending a pulse throughout his entire being. They clawed at each other hungrily, passion flowing from their guts and communicating through their lips, driving them further into the abyss.

His hands tangled in her beautiful long hair, her braid coming lose, as he pulled her face even harder into his. He could hear her hand scrambling for the door knob, rattling once she reached it. The click of it opening offering a sweeter release than it'd ever know. They fell through the open doorway, Alistair using a booted foot to slam the door shut behind them, the silence of the room interrupted by ragged breaths and longing moans.

A hearth in the corner, flickered absently, spreading a thin layer of light throughout the room.

Kallian stepped back, out of breath, her hair a mess as she tugged at the extravagant dress. She finally growled pulling the skirt up, and grabbing a small dagger that had been strapped to her ankle. Kallian handed it to Alistair, hilt end first, he knitted his brow as she motioned to the back of the dress.

"Get this off of me..." She turned around, revealing the ties that kept her confined.

"Are you sure?" Alistair questioned, laughing at her determination to get out of this dress. Kallian nodded anxiously, pushing the lapping hair from her face. He shrugged, only to eager to obliged, running the blade skillfully up her back. He tossed the knife to the bureau, it landed with a crack, as he turned back to her. Pushing the dress from her shoulders, it fell to the ground, leaving her looking so small in the center of it.

Alistair started kissing her shoulder, leading up to her neck, reaching her chin with a groan. Kallian titled her head back, kissing him with her back still to him, her hand gripping his cheek pulling him closer to him. His hands began to roam over her slips, stroking her thigh and trailing up to her stomach, ending off cupping her breast. She groaned with anticipation, turning around and pull off his tunic, followed by his breaches. She whipped her slip off over her head, throwing it to the side, standing before him in her bare glory.

He paused, tracing a hand along her collar bone, smiling at the goosebumps that spread across her chest. They stood gawking at each others nude bodies for moment, enjoying the moment they thought they'd never have again. Kallian placed a small hand upon his chest, stroking down to his belly button, he pulled her into him. Stroking the hair from her face, he looked deep into the green pools of her eyes.

"Maker, you are beautiful." he gasped, Alistair at nearly forgotten what it had been like, to be this close to her. He took in her scent, watched intently as she blushed, pulling her eye's to the ground. Alistair took her chin in his hand, tilting her head up, and pulling her into a deep kiss. His hands roamed downward, grasping her thighs, and pulling them up—resting them upon his hips. Kallian weighed no more than a feather, he imagined as he carried her to the bed, maybe a long sword, or a shield. Her hands finding themselves at the back of his neck again, pulling him in as they fell on to the mattress.

Alistair now lay on top of her, feeling her weight beneath him sent a feeling of ecstasy down his gut, and into his pelvic region. With every gentle stroke of her hands, the way she bit her lip as he kissed down her chest, arching her back in sheer pleasure; caused him to grow. He stroked the inside of her thighs, smiling at the flicker of desire behind her eyes, calling to him to go further. Kallian began to stroke the length of his desire, Alistair had waited until he finally felt as if he was going to explode. The howling urge of his body was to much to resist, a pain settling in—telling him to finally take her.

He pulled her hips into his, holding her thighs tightly around his waist, as he thrust into her. Kallian moaned, pulling herself upward into him, her nails digging into his back. Alistair trailed his tongue along her collar bone, continuing to thrust as he reached her supple breasts, running it along her nipple. She cried out for him, pulling his lips into a possessive kiss, throwing her head back as they had finally reached climax.

Alistair collapsed to her side, bliss filling the air surrounding them as a sense of euphoria tingled from his every extremity. He sunk further into the mattress, Kallian had her head upon his chest, her breaths becoming tame. This was exactly where he was supposed to be.

He was stirred from his sleep by a cold fringe in the room, something felt off. Alistair swept his arm to find he was alone in this bed, a rock sank into his stomach, as his eye's focused on an empty room.


	20. Your Arms

**A/N: **Sorry! a horrible case of writers block over took me, (holiday stress). I have a request from any of my artistically capable readers. I would really really like a picture drawn of my Warden and Alistair. It would really help my creative flow. So If you're interested send me a PM and it's kind of a reward of your choosing sort of thing. But back to the story! Please READ, REVIEW and ENJOY!

_The smell of mildew and decomposition over whelmed her senses, a torch flickering in the distance barely cast enough light to outline the space, though Kallian felt it eerily familiar. She felt the uneven stone ground against her bare feet; a thin night dress was the only barrier she had to protect her from the chill. She struggled blindly to stand, the ground was wet, and as she planted her hands against the walls she found moisture coating them as well. _

_Making her way forward, squinting toward the light that seemed to grow increasingly duller, her foot landed on something hard with a sickening crunch. Pain shot up through her foot, following all the way up to her knee, Kallian leaned down—feeling frantically for what she had stepped on. Nausea twisted her stomach into knots, as she picked up a shard of what she recognized to be bone, she let it fall from her fingers. She had to move. _

_Every step she took seemed to be another step backward, the light growing farther and farther away. The ground was now covered in bones, cracking and cutting at her legs as she cried out, the walls were closing in on her. A misplaced step sent her tumbling down, splashing face first into the ground, Kallian looked down to find her body stained red. Blood that she could not determine the origin coated her body; it dripped from the walls, and swamped the floor. A scream rushed past her lips, it reverberated against the walls—flowing down the tunnel. She could still barely make out what was around her, though she hardly thought she wanted too, a faint sound of crying came from beyond the end of the tunnel. This crying was different, it sounded as an infant calling for it's mother._

_What was an infant doing in a place like this? _

_Kallian pushed her self to her feet, launching herself in a run, skillfully balancing on the growing number of bones. Eternity did not seem like a justified word for how long it had taken her to reach the end of the tunnel. It had morphed into a doorway, gripping both sides of the frame, the stumbled into the room._

_It was warm, filled with light by a crackling hearth, a small cot stood in the corner—surrounded by books and papers. A crib stood adjacent to the cot, the crying infant still wailing from within, Kallian took a cautious step toward her. Her footsteps landed with a squish,the blood still dripped from her night dress as she advanced. _

_She had reached the crib, a blanket bundled upon the mattress, Kallian reached to pull back the cloth when a cackle sounded off behind her. She spun on her heels, to find a familiar face standing behind her. _

"_But...I killed you." She stuttered, remaining completely still._

"_You killed but a piece, a small piece." Flemeth smiled, stepping forward on tall heels, she looked—younger in a way._

"_How...?" The question died on Kallian's lips, recoiling as Flemeth roared with laughter._

"_The body is such a small, constricting thing, isn't it?" she replied, approaching the crib. "I had to place a back-up plan, in case Morrigan finally got some one to listen to her tune, which she did—ever so beautifully."_

"_I do not know where she is." Kallian could hear a baby cuing from the crib behind her, a movement beneath the blanket caused her to jump. _

"_Oh dear girl!" Flemeth laughed again, "That I am not concerned with, Morrigan will play her little freedom game, then eventually come calling to me. You believe this to be the first time she has run off?"_

"_I suppose not." Kallian grew more tense, placing herself between the witch and the crib. "Then why are you here? To take revenge?"_

"_Oh no, no, no. I am here merely to offer some...friendly advice." _

"_Alright then...speak." Kallian leaned back against the crib, her hands planted in the edge, ready for anything. _

"_hurtled into the chaos you fight, and the world will shake before you." Flemeth turned, pacing the room, her cape dragging upon the floor behind her. It seemed every step she took, the walls came in further, finally the witch stopped before her; a wicked smile planted upon her face._

"_We stand upon the precipice of change, the world fears the inevitable plummet into the abyss, watch for that moment, and when it comes...do not hesitate to leap!" She reached around Kallian, flipping the blanket off to reveal...nothing, the crib stood empty. Flemeth's laugh reigned through the room, she grabbed Kallian's chin, pulling her attention away from the illusion. "It is only when you fall, you can learn whether you can fly!" _

Kallian jerked awake, sweat rolling down her forehead, she tried to steady her rapid breaths. The room was still dark, the sky outside the window painted in reds and purple, the dawn was soon approaching. She pulled up her knees, pushing back the hair that plastered itself to her forehead, she let a subtle sigh escape her lips. A snort from beside her made her jump, she peered to her side, to find Alistair fast asleep. Naked.

Shit, Shit...Sodding nug—shit."Hushed curses came out like a sailor, flashes from last night ran through her mind, as she catapulted herself from under the sheets.

_His kiss, _she gathered her under clothes from their scattered locations on the floor, sliding them on as quickly as possible. _His hands. _Kallian pulled on a tunic, and leggings, not bothering with shoes for now. _His breath on your neck. _

She had always considered herself a rather; agile person, light on her feet. She could move through an entire battle without being seen by a single warrior, she was a rouge, it came with the territory. Though even with the grace of the Marker, she could not of stopped herself from tripping and stumbling the entire way out of that room. When she had finally escaped the room, following the reassuring click of the large wooden door, a sigh of relief flooded past her lips.

Leaning against the adjacent wall, Kallian wiggled her toes against the cold stone floor, examining for any cuts of bruises. Her pale legs consisted of the normal wear and tear, nothing out of the ordinary.

"Ah maker," She whispered to herself. "What trouble have you gotten yourself into this time."

Kallian waited in the hallway for some time, occasionally looking up at the door, throwing around the idea of going back in. She enjoyed the notion of being back in his arms, surrounded by the warmth of the covers they could stay in there all day, basking in each others glory. What was the harm of finally giving in to what she really wanted? They could run away together, be fugitives, it wouldn't matter. As long as they were together.

_'No'_ She berated herself, pushing away from the wall. _'This was stupid, it never should have happened'_

Her conscious was yelling at her, urging her to move forward, picking up her feet and heading to the one place she knew she could clear her head.

The grass in the training court still held hints of frost, the chill hit Kallian to the bone as she pulled on her old leather boots, she enjoyed the sound of the mud beneath them. The sun had begun to peak over the hills to the east, covering the city in a innocent pink light, yet to be tarnished by the daunting day. She could make out the sounds of the market in the distance, being set up and readied for the day to come.

Kallian picked up an old dagger that stood on the stand, nothing of particular quality, but it would do. She spun the hilt in the palm of her left hand, the frayed leather cracking beneath her grasp, she lead the dull blade in wide arks around her, slashing through her imaginary foes. She began her footwork, taking wide steps and spinning on her heels, ducking beneath the graze of invisible blades. Kallian tumbled and dodged, flipped and rolled, until her cheeks where ruby and her breath unsteady. She caught a glimpse of the training dummy a mere twenty feet from her, tattered and torn, it hung limp from it's post. She smirked, flicking the blade into the air and catching it by it's tip, she flung the knife toward the dummy. It hit it square in the would be chest with a loud thud, digging deep into the wood beneath the cloth.

The sky was still a dull gray, birds chirped in the distance, dogs barked from their kennels. Why was she so content on resisting what she truly desired. Her body moved without question, her legs breaking into a sprint, hoping she'd make it back in time. Kallian's mind had finally caught up when she stood before her bed chamber door, her hand turning the knob.

Alistair was dressing at the foot of the bed, a look of confusion washed over his face as she entered the room. She shut the door quietly, flipping the lock behind her. Kallian crossed the room, kicking off her boots as she did so, Alistair stood.

"Where—"

She threw herself into his arms, halting any objection he had by pressing her lips hard against his. A feeling of relief was accompanied by his arms wrapping around her waist. He pulled her in tighter, lifting her feet off the ground for a moment, before setting her down.

Alistair pulled back, using fragile hands to gingerly sweep the hair from her face. Kallian looked up at him, over whelming sense of joy filled her, she felt the words bubbling from her.

"I am so tired of running."

**A/A/N: **_Yay! Kallian finally came to her senses (kinda). I just got really tired of writing them apart. But do not fear! there is still quite a bit of story that will challenge our hopeless romantics!_


	21. Catch You

**a/n: **_Sorry for the really short chapter, hectic time, will have a nice long one for you soon! A little smutty/fluff for you guys. Thanks so much for all the favs and alerts, it keeps me going. Enjoy!_

He could not remove his eye's from her sleeping form.

Her back moved up and down, silent breaths as she lay on her stomach, smirking in her slumber. Alistair traced his fingers across her shoulder, leading them down to the small of her back, and back up to her neck. Her skin was so soft, the smoothness caught him off guard, he had forgotten what this had felt like.

He smiled at the goosebumps that had formed on her arms, placing a kiss upon them, thankful for every single one of them.

"You know I hate it when you do that." Kallian mumbled, eye's still squeezing shut, the corners of her mouth forming into an even bigger smile.

"No, you don't." He teased, kissing along her arm again, leading up to her neck. Her breath quickened, fingers contracting onto the woolen sheets. Alistair continued to kiss up her neck, leading to her jaw line. "I actually think you rather like it."

She turned her head, his last kiss hitting her square on the lips. His arms found their way around her waist, turning her body to the side, and pulling her closer. Their bare forms planting firmly against each other, she swung her leg over his hip, using it to lock them together.

Alistair pulled from the kiss, pushing her long chocolate hair from her face, he just watched her for a moment. Green met hazel.

"What?" Kallian arched an eyebrow, "Is there something on my face?"

"I just wanted to look at you..."

She hoisted herself on top of him, smiling at the feeling of his growth, his heart raced as she began to move her hips—he ached for more. Alistair looked up at her, his hands moving along her torso, cupping her breasts and running his fingers over her nipples. Her quick exhale urged him forward.

A loud knock sounded from the door, "Commander?", the distinct voice of Anders behind it.

Kallian sighed silently, lowering her head to Alistair's chest, "Just a moment!"

He grabbed her face, pulling her into a deep kiss, before she rolled off him—flinging the blankets over his head. Alistair suppressed a laugh as he heard her pull on a robe, trudging to the door, it creaked as she swung it open.

"Yes?"

"It is nearly lunch, I thought we told Nathaniel we would return by now..." Anders voice was laced with confusion. "Are you feeling alright? You look flushed."

Alistair could hardly contain the snicker.

"I am fine...I was just feeling a little ill...but am better now."

"Are you sure?" Anders questioned.

"Yes. I will meet you in the dining hall in fifteen minutes." Kallian sighed.

"Oh one last thing Commander..."

"What?"

"Have you seen Alistair? He never returned to our room last night, and I haven't been able to find him all morning."

"Uh...No, haven't seen him." Kallian lied, a hint of a giggled in her voice. "I'm sure he will turn up."

The door was shut hastily, before they both started laughing in hushed tones, she began to scour the room for her clothes. When she came close enough to the bed, Alistair grabbed her wrist, pulling her back into his clutches.

"Hey..." she smiled, pretending to fight back as he pulled her closer. "You heard me, we have to go meet Anders down—"

"You said in fifteen minutes..." Alistair said running his hands along her side, beneath the robe. She giggled, climbing on top of him again, resuming where they had left off.

They made love two more times, before finally getting up and dressed, exchanging a final passionate kiss before she scurried from the room.

He couldn't help but feel ecstatic as he pulled on his boots, not even caring he was going to have to wear the same uncomfortable woolen breeches from the night before, he sans-ed the formal tunic—exiting the room in the white under tunic. The smile on his face was plastered there, he felt he could skip to the dining hall.

It was when he rounded the corner, he saw Kallian's head bent over the table, pouring over some maps lain there, that his happiness ceased. Anders and Fergus stood over her, to Alistair's surprise Nathaniel stood next to Kallian.

"What has happened?" He asked, approaching cautiously.

"Two hunters stumbled across a group of darkspawn, they reported a group close to fifty." Kallian kept her eyes on the map, finally double tapping a spot on the outskirts of the Knotwood hills. "Here..."

"But...what could they be doing there?" Alistair asked dismayed. "There has been no recorded deep road entrance in the Knotwood Hills area."

"One of them fell into the a chasm...It seems there is an entrance to Kal'Hirol there." Nathaniel stated, pacing around the table. "It does not seem to be a big group...but normally we have contact with the legion of the dead, we have no received word from them in would you have us do Commander?"

"Something seems off here..." She said, pensively, rolling on her heels. Alistair looked at the map and then to her.

"Do you think?" He asked, hoping to be wrong.

"If this is anything like what happened in Orzammar..." Kallian sighed, rubbing her eyes. "Inform the others, we make way for the Knotwood Hills immediately."


	22. The Last of the Legion

**A/N: **_Temp hiatus over! got distracted with preparing for Mass Effect 3. But now that I got back into the action of the story, I expect it to come much easier. Read and Review please, it's been a while since i've gotten any feed back._

Kallian trudged along, her heels digging in the mud on the trail, the days of rain had kept the ground soft and unrelenting. She wheezed as the incline grew steeper, each step weighted by the drake scale armor. Pausing at the top, Alistair looked back, flashing her the grin she knew was just for her. Her already flushed cheeks grew deeper maroon, she responded with a grin of her own, turning her attention quickly back to the mucky ground. The sound of someone clearing their throat pulled her gaze upward, the soiled blue robes caught her eyes first, followed by the face of a inquisitive Anders.

"So I take it Alistair was not really missing this morning?" His eyebrows raised as he shot a look in Alistair's smirking direction.

"I cannot fathom what you are talking about." Kallian lied, doing her best to avert her blush elsewhere.

"mhmm..." The mage smirked, dodging her elbow.

The site was not far from Denerim, maybe half a days ride on horse back, though the journey was unfortunately prolonged. The storm had taken it's toll upon the route, downed trees and branches cluttered the path, forcing them to dismount and continue on foot. The clouds had finally parted after days of being nothing more than a black blanket coating the sky, it revealed the end trails of a beautiful afternoon. The sun had begun it's descent beneath the mountains, though it's rays still beamed upon Kallian's face. It was warm by Ferelden standard, which only made their hike up the hill toward the chasm that much more trying.

The land around them had begun to change, just as when they drew nearer to the Blackmarsh, it was easy to see the Darkspawn taint against the ground. Tree's stood bairn, and a light fog rolled in, which seemed odd as the sun still shone.

"Why do all our missions lead us to creepy places?" Anders groaned from behind them, throwing a mock fit as he moved forward in a sluggish fashion.

"Do your subordinates complain as such often?" Justice questioned over his shoulder, raising an eyebrow at Anders smirking face.

"Only the ones with sparkling whit..." the mage quipped, only to receive a sigh of exasperation in return from the spirit.

"Quiet!" Nathaniel called from the front of the group, he stood at the peak of the ever expanding hill, his eyes trained to something below. Kallian could feel her heart rate spike as she rushed forward, pulling her dagger from it's sheath as she ran.

"What—" She began.

"Shh..." Nathaniel put a finger to his lips, using his other hand to point toward a crumbling structure that enveloped the chasm. The signs of dwarfish architecture were blatant, the walls were made from stone, and had runes carved into them that she had only ever seen in Orzammar. It was also obvious that this gateway had been long abandoned, though the walls still stood strong, they were cracked and weather warn. Colums stood toppled over, and weeds flourished between the stone walkway. Dwarfs took pride in their structures and would never let things so easily taken care of go without tending to, without good reason.

Kallian tried to see what Nathaniel was pointing to, when an all to familiar tingle erupted in the back of her skull, her eyes searching for the source.

It was the glint of gold in the sun that first caught her attention, the emissaries armor stood out in the chasm like a sore thumb, it lead with a pack of fifteen or so in tow. They were dragging something behind them, it was small, and was struggling against their grip. A yell rang out against the hillside, and without a moments hesitation, she felt her foot moving beneath her. Kallian ran toward the group of hurlocks without thinking, all she could focus on was the struggling form.

Kallian had the lead, armored footsteps from behind her said her companions were not far behind. She ripped her second dagger free as she jumped over a fallen column. Kallian could see that they had captured a dwarf, who was failing against the hands that grasped its ankle. An arrow whizzed past Kallian's head, planting square in the chest of the hurlock, it fell to it's knees; releasing the dwarf.

Newly freed, the dwarf jumped to her feet, scrambling toward the fallen hurlocks weapon. It proved itself as a competent fighter, helping to make easy work of the group of hurlocks; it was only when Kallian had sunk her blade into the emissaries chest that it removed it's helmet, to reveal a woman beneath. She had short brown hair, tied into pig tails at the base of her head, tattoos covered her chin.

"Wow...that was really close." She smiled, shaking her head with a chuckle, "for a moment there I thought I was really about to join the legion."

"Are you alright?" Kallian asked, wiping the blood from her blade.

"I think I cracked a rib...but it's hard to tell, everything hurts." She continued to smile, looking around at the faces that now surrounded her.

"What are you doing down here, do you need assistance?" Anders asked, curling over trying to catch his breath.

"No, no...I'm fine, I just need to catch my breath." Her hands flew up, as she backed away slowly. "I should actually go back...as silly as that sounds...to see if there's anything I can do..."

The dwarf paused, turning around to look back toward the opening to Kal'Hirol, a pain look struck her face.

"Back where?" Kallian asked.

"The old fortress of Kal'Hirol, there's something going on there..." The dwarf spun back around, replacing her helmet. "I think the darkspawn are breeding an army...that's what the legion was doing here...but the darkspawn, they proved to much for us, it was a massacre. I am the only one left."

"Maker. That's horrible." Velanna gasped, surveying the bloodied dwarf cautiously.

"The darkspawn are different, they are smart now. They destroyed the legion, I saw them taking some of the women, and I wasn't about to stick around to find out way." the dwarf warned, moving forward, her eyes grazing wildly.

Kallian shot a worried look over her shoulder over to Alistair. When on mission in Orzammar during the blight they encounter a group of dwarfs, who had been ravaged by darkspawn, the women were taken; turned into brood mothers. A chill of fear ran through her, washing her veins, as her heart finally slowed.

"That was a good move..." Kallian stammered, running her hands over her face.

"There are many such things worse than death, but breeding darkspawn day and night is probably the worst. If the darkspawn are really breeding an army, I need to do something..."

"But we are Grey Wardens, this is kind of our thing..." Anders stepped forward, bowing toward the dwarf. Kallian rolled her eyes, he really had no sense of boundaries.

"Huh, that's convenient, the ancestors must have had a hand in this. Well I shall show you where Kal'Hirol is, safety in numbers yes?" the dwarf replied.

"All right, come with us." Kallian shrugged, making her way toward the large entrance.

"Excellent, with your help, destroying this nest is no longer impossible; just improbable." She laughed from behind them.

"What shall we call you?" Alistair finally spoke up, holding a rag to his bloodied eyebrow.

"Sigrun, I am of the legion of the dead, pleased to make your acquaintance." Sigrun smiled, rushing to keep up. "We must hurry, when left alone, darkspawn get up to all sorts of mischief."


	23. Foot in Mouth

**A/N: **_Sorry for the long wait, not as bad as last time though, huh? Thanks for those just joining in, R+R please and enjoy!_

The entrance to Kal'Hirol brought bile to Alistair's mouth, carcasses littered the walk way, their blood still coated the wall as dark paint. Though the entrance was small, when they reached the clearing, his jaw dropped.

The fortress of Kal'Hirol was enormous, it hadn't seemed as though they descended that far, but the ceiling to the cave was more than one hundred feet above them. Houses sitting in the lower level, were now either falling apart from decades of neglect, or being consumed by darkspawn taint. Since entering the cavern his skull had not stopped buzzing, it was like being in Ortan Thaig all over again, an experience he was not soon going to forget. The smell of decay was only over taken by the smell of mildew, a commonality in the deep roads. As they neared the steps; Sigrun stopped, looking out over the fortress.

"I do not know much about this place, only that it was important once, a center of learning for the smith caste." She sighed, "When the fortress was lost, so was much of what they had learned, they've never built anything quite like this since."

Alistair debated on saying something of comfort, though he had never been good at things like that, he usually cracked a joke that would either; make them laugh, or make it horribly worse. It seemed like she was not the laughing sort, so he kept his mouth shut.

They moved forward, going down the stairs to find bodies of what he could only assume were Sigrun's dead comrades. He caught a glimpse of the dwarfs frown growing deeper, she kept her eyes up, and did not shed a tear, just continued to walk forward.

"Elves were not meant for below ground...it is empty and unlivable down here. No trees or plants, only death, and stone." Velanna complained, dodging a darkspawn corpse, glaring as Kallian smirked.

Alistair had done his best to keep his gaze from floating her way, he found when he did let it slip, a grin would spawn on his face; a dead give away. Kallian glanced over her shoulder at him, as if she could read his thoughts, he smiled; and she blushed. Then the blasted mage would lean over, making some smart remark, but Alistair didn't care.

Maker, she was beautiful.

"It's Jutka!" Sigrun yelled, pulling Alistair from his goofy smiling haze, the dwarf rushed forward. A few feet a head of them, Alistair spotted him; a red headed dwarf, crawling toward them. He was badly injured, a trail of blood indicated just how far he'd crawled. His braided beard dragged along the down, he winced in agony, pushing himself forward.

"Si...Sigrun? Is that you?" He muttered, looking up from the ground.

"Yes it's me, be still and try not to talk..." She coddled, pushing the matted hair from his eyes.

"Anders..." Kallian whispered over her shoulder.

"He is beyond anything that I could do." the mage replied, shaking his head sympathetically.

"No, I feel...my death...upon me. It is a sweet release." Jutka wheezed with a grin, clutching to the wound in his abdomen, blood dripping rapidly through his fingers.

"No! I have bandages...I can help." Sigrun cried, reaching for her pack. Jutka's hand snapped away from his torso, grabbing her wrist, stopping her.

"You must listen to me...The brood mothers, they are breeding an army. You must...you must stop them, but beware...beware the children...they are abominations...even amongst darkspawn standards." Jutka gasped, looking up toward the other wardens.

"Children? Whose children?" Justice asked.

Jutka erupted into a coughing fit, blood was now spurting from his mouth, and Alistair looked upon the dwarf with pity. "For—forgive me..." he wheezed in a final breath, before collapsing to the ground.

"Ancestors look kindly upon you brother," Sigrun whispered, running her hand lightly over his face, before standing and turning toward Kallian. "We must finish what the Legion has started, those brood mothers need to be destroyed."

Alistair watched as Kallian nodded nervously, unsheathing her daggers, as the group continued forward. They faced straggling groups of hurlocks and genlocks, and when they came up upon the 'Children' that Jutka spoke of, they proved to be the very same larva looking creatures they faced in the black marsh.

It was impossible to tell how long it had taken them to reach the fortress, time spent beneath ground always seemed to move triple the amount it did in the real world. Sigrun rushed forward, peaking around a stone column, before motioning the rest of the group forward.

Alistair rounded the corner, wishing to turn back immediately. Before them stood a great courtyard, bodies of dwarfs and hurlock alike were strewn across the stone floor, he had to choke back the smell. He glanced to Sigrun, who had maintained the same deep frown since their re entrance.

"The Legion had made it this far without issue." The dwarf sighed, "That is when we got careless...and complacent...we stormed the keep from the front, it was a disaster...the darkspawn were waiting, they turned the Thaig's defenses against us."

She motioned toward a great staircase that stood in the center of the courtyard, it lead up to the great hall of Kal'Hirol, Alistair shuddered at the thought of the darkspawn that possibly lie in wait behind the great stone door.

"We should do well than to find another way..." Nathaniel sneered.

"Do you not think I know that, human?" Sigrun snapped, sending a glare toward Nathaniel that made Alistair shy away. "Most Dwarfish structures have a secret side entrance, we must find this one."

They spread out through the courtyard, looking around corners and running their hands along the walls. Alistair spied Kallian slipping around a corner alone, and he took the cue to follow.

She ran her hand along the wall so delicately, handling the stone as if it were fine china, a smirk planted upon her face. She hopped over a corpse that seemed to have been there far longer than the legion's battle.

"If you are trying to be sneaky, it is not working." Kallian smiled over her shoulder.

"I can be very sneaky." Alistair protested, stepped over the corpse toward her. Kallian gave him an unsure look, rolling her eyes playfully.

"You should try breathing through your nose then..." she laughed, "I heard you coming before I even rounded the corner."

Alistair crossed his arms in a pout, that made Kallian giggle even more. Her hair had begun to come unwoven from her braid, stray hairs shrouded her brilliant green eyes. She stepped forward, now standing nose to nose with Alistair, a sweet smile upon her face. He placed his hand upon her face, running his thumb along her cheek, it was as if nothing had changed. As she leaned in for a kiss, Alistair realized, things had changed.

"What about Teagan?" Alistair asked pensively, shying his face away from her.

"What about Teagan, Alistair?" She replied, a spark igniting in her tone, making him immediately regret his words.

"Well...I mean...What happens after all of this?" He stepped back, running his fingers through his matted hair. Might as well go for it now. "Are you still going to marry him?"

Kallian just stared at him for a moment, her mouth hung open, as he watched her search for the words. _Why, Alistair? Why are you so intent on being miserable? _He yelled at himself.

"I...I can't believe you'd ask me that..." Kallian whispered, wrapping her arms around her torso, mimicking a chill. The air hung thick before them, he just wished he knew when to keep his mouth shut.

"That's not an answer..." He replied, _Agh! Why don't you just shut up!_ "I cannot leave this be Kallian, I will not return to the surface just to loose you again...I would rather go to my calling now, than face that again."

She looked away, tears welled in her eyes, as her hand reached up to conceal ragged breaths. Alistair felt the pain in his gut, he swallowed heavily, as he eagerly awaited her response.

"WE FOUND IT!" Anders hollered out, followed by shushing from the rest of the companions. Alistiar looked over his shoulder for a moment, turning back as he heard Anders giggle. "What? We did..."

"This is not a conversation for right now..." Kallian finally broke the silence stepping forward, she wiped her eyes, "But if it will make you feel better— No, I was not planning on going back to him."

She moved to walk past him, Alistair hooked his hand around her upper arm, twirling her back to him. "Kali—"

"Maker Alistair..." She cut him off, rolling his hand from her arm. "You can be so damned foolish..."

He cursed himself as he watched her walk away, waiting a moment before following. He couldn't agree more.


	24. Sinking like a stone

_A/N: So a year really does go by quick. I am determined to finish this story if it takes ten years. Thank you to all the loyal readers and reviewers, and to all you who are reading for the first time. Hopefully this inspiration streak takes us to home base. Read and Review!_

Kallian thrust her blade into the torso of the hurlock with such force, the hilt reverberated as it made contact with the creatures spine. Spewing through it's decayed teeth, it fell to the ground with a thud-jerking her forward with it. Her breath hitched as she wrapped her second hand around the handle, freeing the blade with a sickly squish.

A foot step sounded off behind her, sending her in a defensive spiral. Her blade stopped an inch short of Alistair's throat.

"Whoa! Kallian...it's just me." Alistair chuckled, raising his hands in the air.

"Why would you sneak up on me?" Kallian snapped, her blade lingering for a moment longer than it should have.

"I thought you said I couldn't sneak if I tried." Alistair pointed out, lowering his hands.

"This is not a time to be cute, Alistair." Kallian turned on her heel, holstering her dagger. Alistair's hand looped around her bicep, trying to turn her back around.

"Kali..."

"Alistair, don't!" She ripped her arm from his grasp, her eyes spanning the opening of the great hall.

She continued forward, hopping over another mangled corpse. Kallian feigned anger, so he couldn't see what she really felt. Hurt. She understood that someone in this situation had to be, though she didn't think it would be herself. The image of sitting before Teagan, looking into his eyes as his heart breaks, stabbed at her own. She would tell him the truth- she owed him that at least.

These are all thoughts that should have crossed her mind ages ago. It wasn't until Alistair had brought it up; she had realized they were playing a game of pretend. They acted as though nothing had changed, as if they were back to how it was three years ago. Before Alistair had torn himself from her life, leaving her a devastated wreck in his wake. It was all coming back to her again, she had broken the love spell that they had so intricately placed upon the truth. Kallian stopped, closing her eyes the memories came back in flashes. The nightmares that woke her up in a cold sweat, screaming into the darkness- in fear of what maybe behind it. Sitting in the courtyard, staring for hours longingly for him to come bursting through the gates. Only to be crushed with every lonely sunset.

Kallian winced, the memories reminding her of how pathetic, and useless he had left her feeling. What was to stop him from doing it again? She opened her eyes, moving forward toward the doorway that the darkspawn had tried to flank them from. Her brain erupted with buzzing, she took another delicate step. A familiar low screeching could be made out in the distance. She motioned the rest of her companions over.

"Agh, we're going in the scary doorway aren't we?" Anders squeaked, jumping behind Velanna.

"I thought Grey Warden's were supposed to be fearless?" Sigrun asked, cocking an eyebrow at the mage.

Velanna took a side step away from Anders, Nathaniel attempted to hide his smug smirk as the elf closed up next to him.

"We have a duty to do here, let us make haste!" Justice ordered, moving forward down the corridor.

Kallian nodded, not quite sure what to say to follow that. She turned and followed suit, the stench of decay growing stronger as they made their way down the long hallway. The darkspawn taint grew thicker, fleshy sacks hung from the walls.

"Ewww..." Anders gasped, reaching out with his finger to poke one. Nathaniel was quick to grab his wrist.

"Do not touch mage, lest you wish to join the darkspawn slaves." He instructed, nodding down to the dwarven corpses that littered the hallway.

"I believe we had already covered that with that whole drinkin' their blood ritual." Anders snapped, pulling his wrist free. Sigrun lingered behind them, smirking at the banter. Kallian looked over her shoulder, Alistair trailed at the end of the pack- looking increasingly more uncomfortable.

"If this really is a Broodmother, I must warn you. They have many tentacles, that are quick. Though they are big, disgusting creatures they are cunning. Stay sharp." Kallian instructed, moving toward the end of the hall.

They entered another room, bigger than the first. A walk way ran along the walls, framed by stone railings. A large metal chandelier hung from the center of the ceiling, held up by giant metal chains spanning to each corner of the room. The screeching echoed off the walls, makes communication near impossible. Kallian crossed to the rail, looking down in horror at the floor below.

"Three?!" Alistair exclaimed, leaning next to her. "Kallian, last time we faced _one_ of these thing we barely made it out!"

Kallian scanned the room, looking for a way down. Her eyes stopped again at the large chains, leading up to the large chandelier- which hung directly above the Broodmothers.

"The difference this time is we will be no where near them." She stated smugly, nodding toward the corners of the room. "Those chains must be ancient, wouldn't you say Sigrun?"

"Aye, the rust alone surprises me they are still holding, it shouldn't take more than a few hits with a proper blade." The dwarf agreed, brandishing her ax.

"Let us make quick work of this and be done with it." Kallian said, moving toward the first chain.

Three tentacles spurted from the ground before her, whipping at her viciously. She pulled her daggers from there holsters, hacking away at them quickly, before more came. Alistair joined next to her, slamming his shield against one that threatened to wrap itself around her ankle. When they had finally vanquished them, she turned around to the others. "This would be quicker if we split up!"

The group took order, moving to each chain hastily. Battling through tentacles, and straggling darkspawn troupes. They reached the final chain, Alistair did not hesitate to strike it with his sword. The room shook as the chandelier wavered, the chains loosened, the Broodmothers screeching as it came crashing down upon them.

Aside from the rapid breathing of her companions, the room was silent.

Kallian yet again paid the sun praise, relishing in the warmth of it's light as they walked through Vigil's Keep's courtyard. The thought of a warm bath was all that pressed her mind, the stain of blood and dirt soiled her skin. She ached down to her bones, trudging forward at a slower pace, the doors to the keep within sight.

"So are we back to you not talking to me?" Alistair piped up. Kallian jumped, she had nearly forgotten he was there. He hadn't spoke a word since they left the thaig.

"Alistair, I do not have the energy to argue with you right now." She sighed.

"Then do not argue, _talk_ to me." Alistair pleaded, grabbing her arm at the base of the stairs.

Kallian turned toward him, straightening her stance as she met his gaze. His hazel eyes were clouded with concern, as his blond hair seemed almost brown now. He was caked with the same blood and dirt as she was. She bit her lip, looking to her boots before speaking.

"You were right."

"I was?" Alistair cocked his head in surprise.

She rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her torso. "I must talk with Teagan, and tell him what happened. Tell him the marriage is off."

Alistair's eye's widened, the hint of a smirk tugged at the corners of his mouth. "You're serious?"

Kallian fought the urge to smack him upside his head. "There is one condition, Alistair."

"Anything my love!" Alistair sputtered, taking her hand into his.

"You cannot go running off every time I do something you do not agree with, because I can guarantee it will happen again, and you must trust my judgment-"

He cut off her ramblings with a kiss, pulling her into him completely. All her thoughts from before were buried once again, replaced with thoughts of his arms around her- encompassing her completely. Warmth spread from her chest to her toes, as she ran her fingers through his matted hair. She did not feel pathetic, she felt whole once again.

He pulled away, his mouth forming a full grin. "I promise, as long as you will have me...I will be here, my love." He kissed the palm of her hand, a full blush emerging from her cheeks.

They turned to move up the stairs, hand in hand.

The great oak doors swung open, trails of guards flowed out of the doors, Kallian stopped half way up the steps- releasing Alistair's hand in the process.

"Sister, I would have a word with you." Fergus stepped to the top of the stairs, his eyes flickering angrily toward Alistair. "Both of you."


	25. O' brother part deux

_A/N: So any of you who have gotten back with an ex, knows it's harder for friends and family to accept them back, than you. Thanks for the reviews! Hope you enjoy!_

Fergus strutted confidently toward the dining hall, Alistair shot a worried glance to Kallian- who just gave him a unknowing shrug. The palms of his hands began to sweat beneath his leather gloves. The doors to the hall swung open with a thud. Warden recruits scattered about the three long tables, laughing heartily with each other- Alistair smirked at the camaraderie. His mind took him back to when he had first joined the Wardens, his smirk vanished as he remembered all those he used to laugh with were now perished.

"Leave us!", Fergus demanded, his voice booming against the stone walls. The recruits quieted, cocking an eye brow in confusion as they looked between the siblings, pausing on Kallian- waiting for confirmation. She grimaced heavily, nodded and ushering them from the room with an extended palm. Fergus grew impatient, "Now!"

The clatter of silverware on cheap china filled the hall for a moment, as the soldiers rushed from the room. Leaving Alistair alone with the Teyrn and Kallian, the silence left was deafening.

Alistair stationed himself behind Kallian, her brow furrowed in a scary fashion that he knew all to well. Her hands curled into fists, he briefly thanked the Maker she had given Nathaniel her blades to be sharpened. Alistair placed a hand delicately on the small of her back, hoping it would use to calm her down.

"Sit down", Fergus shouted abruptly, slamming the door shut behind the recruits.

"Fergus, you are out of line-" Kallian started.

"Oh you see that is where you are misguided sister." Fergus interrupted, his nostrils flared in the same way Kallian's did when she was upset. Alistair cringed at the similarities he saw between them. "Not only am I your Teyrn, _Arlessa_. I am you older brother, and as your brother; I feel it pertinent to inform you when you are being a fool. So as I instructed...sit down."

Fergus rested his hands upon the chair back, his green eyes burning into Alistair with such intensity, he had to look away. Alistair pulled out a chair for Kallian, she shook her head, glaring back at her brother. She crossed her arms in front of her, "A fool?"

"No, fool is to kind of a word for what you are doing, sister. What you are doing is stupid." Fergus stated bluntly, Alistair stood for a moment dumb founded. How had he found out?

"Fergus, what are you talking about?!" Kallian demanded, her voice laced with irritation.

"You think me foolish enough to not know what happens beneath my roof, Kallian Grace?"

"Listen, Fergus." Alistair stammered, stepping forward.

"Say one more word Alistair, and I will have you exiled to the farthest reaches of the freemarshes we can find- and this time I will make sure you do not find your way back!" Fergus shouted, forcing Alistair to shrink back.

"Keep your empty threats to yourself, Fergus!" Kallian returned, "I was planning on speaking with Teagan as soon as I got back."

"Well, thank the Maker you were _planning _on speaking with him," the words dripped from Fergus's mouth with sarcasm, the look upon his face no better. "You within days, have successfully torn apart years of work!"

Kallian rolled her eyes, sighing audibly. Alistair pinched at her, worried her testing her brothers patience was like poking a Mabari with a stick. She slapped his hand away, moving forward again. "Fergus, it was never my intention for Teagan to get hurt, or for any of this to happen."

"I just ask you; what did you intend to happen upon finding him, Kallian?" Fergus asked, exasperation replacing the anger in his voice.

Alistair felt invisible, and had no interest in breaking the illusion. He wondered why Fergus had bothered to force him into the awkward family reunion in the first place. Maybe just so he could yell at him? Remind him of what a foolish child he still felt like. His gaze traveled to Kallian, her mouth hung open as she searched for an answer.

"I believe you knew exactly what would happen," Fergus stated, looking to Kallian with a look of compassion.

Alistair's heart twisted in his chest, it didn't matter if Kallian had forgiven him anymore- it was getting the people who stayed to accept him back.

"Fergus, I hardly think..." Kallian trailed off, looking awkwardly toward Alistair.

"Did you tell him?" Fergus asked, gesturing toward Alistair. "Tell him, how you did not sleep or eat for months? How you cried your heart out in the garden where you thought no one would see?"

"I.." Kallian tripped over her words, a flourish of red spreading through her cheeks. She looked down, Alistair's heart twisting again as he watched her squirm in embarrassment.

"Before you accept him back so easily, he should know what damage he caused. Children do not even get away with mischief so easily." Fergus insisted, his tone escalated again.

"I assure you, Fergus." Alistair countered, stepping in front of a silent Kallian. "I know exactly what a fool I was to go, and I have already assure Kallian, that I will spend every breath I have left repenting for my actions."

Alistair kept his gaze locked upon Fergus, using a technique he picked up from Kallian's mabari- puffing up his chest he moved forward.

Fergus shot a hit hand up, palm facing Alistair, "Forgive me if I find your declaration too little too late. If you truly cared for my sister, you would not have let such a thing as vanity cloud such a strong bond."

Kallian remained quite, her arms crossed tightly over her abdomen. She wasn't looking toward the squabbling men, but to her feet. Alistair would have been more upset at her leaving him defenseless, though he knew this was coming- and he more than deserved it.

"Fergus, I doubt you will be the first I need to have this conversation with, so I hope you will spread the word around. As long as Kallian wills me at her side, I will be there. Maker forbid, she no longer desires it- I will then leave." Alistair insisted.

Fergus sighed deeply, he loosened his grip on the back of the chair. "Sister, this is your life, just realize your decisions have ramifications. Teagan deserves an explanation..."

Kallian nodded grimly, "I know, Fergus."

"He will be here before night fall," Fergus released the chair, shaking his head before walking toward the doors. He turned back, "Spare me a war, and at least pretend to have some compassion for the man."

With that Fergus turned and exited the room, swinging the door shut behind him. Alistair turned to Kallian, she bit her lower lip, avoiding his gaze.

"I am sorry, he has always had a tendency to be a bit over protective."

"A bit?" Alistair jested, hooking his hand around her arm. He pulled her into a hug, locking his arms around her shoulders- her head resting perfectly below his chin. "I should be the one apologizing."

"Why?" Kallian asked, leaning her head back to meet his gaze.

He freed a hand, using it to wipe away the strands of hair that plagued her forehead. Alistair smirked, his fingers smudged the dirt that caked upon her face, leaving a porcelain white trail in their wake.

"For letting you walk around with such a mess upon your face," He smiled, kissing her forehead delicately. He released a low chuckle as she pinched at his side, "I suppose it would be in poor taste for us to take a bath with your brother beneath the same roof?"

Kallian shook her head, "No, in fact I suppose it would be in poor taste for us not to. I find our current appearance most offensive."

Alistair lowered his face, planting a firm kiss upon her lips. Any feeling of anger flushed out of his body through that kiss, replaced by images of Kallian submerged in the tub. She pulled away, taking a step back, she kept her hands wrapped firmly upon his. "I know a back way to my chamber.."


	26. I caught fire

**A/N: WARNING, GRAPHIC CHAPTER **(of the juicy nature... ;) Long chapter full of that and confrontation. Read, Review and enjoy!

Kallian let the warmth of the water consume her every thought, peace surrounding her in an uncertain infinity. She sat perfectly positioned between Alistair's legs, her back leaning against his bare chest. The tub large enough to fit them both comfortably.

He trailed his fingers delicately along the length of her shoulder, treating her skin as he would fine china. This sent chills through her body and down to her spine- goosebumps erupting across her flesh. She smirked, feeling his lips following the path of his fingers, starting behind her ear moving downward to the crook of her neck. It was a futile effort to combat the bumps.

She shifted in the water, the combination of his touch mixed with the perfumed water sent her into sensory overload.

"What is it?" Alistair whispered into her ear, his teeth grazing along the lobe.

"I...I just never expecting to be back here, like this." Her voice was calm, relaxed as the words she had wanted to say for so long, slipped from her lips like honey. Kallian leaned her head back, nuzzling it between his shoulder and cheek.

He did not respond, just slid his hands beneath the water, bringing them to rest upon her ribs- just below her breasts. He spanned his fingers, pulling her tighter into him. Excitement pulsed through her as she felt the extent of his naked form against hers.

"Marry me..."

Kallian felt a new rush through her chest, a compilation of panic and excitement.

"Are you mad? Have you already forgotten I am already engaged to be married?" She asked pushing herself off of Alistair, she began to lift herself from the tub. "I told you to start wearing a helmet.."

"No, I am not mad, nor have I forgotten about the engagement that you have informed me shall be called off." Alistair chuckled, pulling her back into him.

The water splashed over the brim of the tub, she landed facing him this time, that stupid smirk she hated to love plastered on his face.

"Why now?" She returned, arching a brow. His smile grew, he ran his hand through her damp hair, loosening the tie that held it all back.

"I had always imagined there would be a perfect time, or a perfect place to ask you this." His hand stopped at the nape of her neck, he locked his gaze upon hers. "But with us...with you, every moment is perfect, and where ever I am with you, is perfect. I cannot imagine spending another second without you, or another day without you as my wife."

Kallian was caught with her mouth open, the panic calmed and was soon overwhelmed by joy, she smiled. Time seemed to slow around them, the air grew thicker, as the world grew silent. Green met hazel.

"I..." Kallian started, the words caught in her throat, as she fought back the urge to burst into tears. She began nodding like a fool.

Alistair laughed heartily, pulling her face into his, their lips locking together. The answer seemed so clear now, her hesitation felt futile. She ran her fingers through his short hair, their tongues entwined in an intricate dance. Kallian melted against him, as his arms snaked around her waist, pulling her deeper into his chest. The heat emanating between their bodies and the heat from the water was near overwhelming, she broke away- desperate to catch her breath. "Maker, I will suffer a heat stroke..."

Alistair just smiled at the flush in her cheeks, sliding his legs from beneath her- and standing from the tub. Kallian looked up to him, disappointment crossing her face in an obvious fashion. He stepped from the tub, offering his hand to help her out. She smiled, graciously accepting his hand, lifting from the tub.

There was hardly a full moment for her to stabilize herself upon the floor before he scooped her up into his arms, sweeping her off her feet in a very literal fashion. A laugh erupted from her gut, goosebumps covered her entire body as the cold air caressed her skin.

"You know, you are not supposed to carry me across the threshold till after we are wed?" She giggled as he made his way through the door leading to her bed chamber.

"Kallian, I will carry you across any threshold I damned well please." Alistair jested, using his most firm tone. "Warden Commander or not..."

Kallian quieted as they reached the bed, Alistair laid her down against the mattress with a tenderness she had scarcely remembered he possessed. Her wet skin soaked the silk sheets, catching on to her as Alistair hitched her up to the center of the bed. He loomed over her, pausing to look upon her naked form beneath his.

"Maker, so beautiful." Alistair murmured, running a calloused hand from the top of her thigh to cup her breast. He lowered his head down, squeezing her tighter, as he ran his tongue around her nipple ending with a light nip. She released a meek moan, involuntarily arching her back as the desire pulsed through her veins.

He moved his attention to the other breast, continuing to run his free hand along the length of her body. He stopped just on the top of her pubic line, teasing her as he trailed his fingers back and forth- refusing to go any further just yet. Her breaths grew desperate and ragged, "Alistair..."

His smell filled her nostrils, a mixture of musk and the sweetness from the perfumed water. His warmth against her was intoxicating, she reveling at the feeling of his weight on top of her. She wrapped her hand around his swollen member, massaging it gently. She paused at the tip, biting her lip in satisfaction as he released a gasp of pleasure.

Alistair smashed his lips against hers, his taste filling her mouth, as she returned ravenously. His fingers plunged into her center, she broke the lip lock with a loud moan, he smiled to find her wet and ready for him.

"Alistair, please..." She begged, pulling harder at his now fully erect cock.

He obliged, removing his fingers and replacing them with his member without hesitation. He pulled her leg up, pinning her calf to his torso, plunging deeper into her core. Kallian cried out, raising her other leg to hook around his lower back, pulling him in deeper.

Alistair grunted, moving faster and faster. Kallian moaned, the brink of climax near, her body began to convulse beneath him.

With a final thrust, they cried out together, her body tingled as he hung above her. He waited a moment before removing himself from her, lowering down for a final sweet kiss upon her swollen lips- then collapsing down next to her.

Kallian rolled closer to him, cupping his cheek with the palm of her hand to turn his face towards her.

"I love you." She whispered, panting to catch her breath.

"I love you more..." Alistair returned, flipping to his side and gingerly placing a kiss upon her lips.

_**Knock Knock**_

"What?!" Kallian cried out in exasperation, her arm still draped across Alistair's chest.

"I am sorry to disturb you, ma'am." A voice stammered from behind the door. "But Teyrn Cousland thought you'd like to know Master Guerrin is here. He will be waiting for you in the study..."

Kallian rolled to her back, looking to the ceiling for a moment before sitting up. She shook her head for a moment, as Alistair ran his hand along her back. "Time to face the music."

_0o0o0o0o0_

"I'm sorry," Kallian repeated, lowering her gaze to the floor, she was unable to meet Teagan's glare. His complete look of sorrow. She could hear Teagan's sigh as he paced the room, his boots landing louder with each step. The fire crackled intensely in the hearth, illuminating every corner of the study in a red glow.

"You are sorry?" He asked sarcastically, malice clear in his tone. He gestured dramatically, running his fingers through his hair.

She kept her mouth shut, pursing her lips as to keep any retort she had in check. She ran the ribbon from the waist of her dress through her fingers, keeping her attention off the the indiscretions that aspired just moments before.

"You see it is I who has become the fool in this scenario," Teagan continued, his pace quickening. "I thought by giving you such freedom, you would come to respect me more for it, but now I see you have just used it as a tool to betray me..."

"I hardly consider this a purposeful act, Teagan." Kallian stood in defense, raising her gaze to follow his movements. Anger bubbled in her chest, she had expected a version of this response, but to be downright cruel was unlike him.

"Please do not pretend you did not know what would happen here," Teagan shouted, turning toward her. "You knew why he would come back, and you knew what would happen if you found him. I have grown weary of you pretending otherwise. Grow up and take responsibility for what you have done!"

"I am doing exactly that," She returned, softening her tone. "I am so sorry, Teagan. I never meant to hurt you."

There was a long pause of silence between them, Kallian rolled on her heels, looking to Teagan to say something...anything. The light of dawn broke through the window, she not realized how late it had gotten, or how early. Teagan looked exhausted, and her heart wrenched from her chest. She took a step toward him, his head hung lower now, not looking to her.

"I know..." he finally admitted, "I wish I could be angry with you, I do. But...despite all of it, I do truly care for you, and your happiness."

Kallian was taken a back, her heart twisted further, she could handle him being angry- but for him to return with compassion was completely beyond her comprehension. His hand raised, gingerly caressing her cheek. "I love you."

"I love you, too" her voice cracked, tears threatening at the corners of her eyes, burning to be released. Teagan placed a delicate kiss upon her forehead, before turning and a leaving the room. The hearth continued to glow red, the fire within crackling hungrily at the stone. Kallian allowed a few tears to stream down her cheeks, to lessen the feeling of a rock placed upon her chest.

It was never that she did not feel for Teagan, she cared for him quite dearly. Though she would have never been able to love him in the way he deserved and they both knew it from the start. Her heart had already been long taken by another, and as relieved as she was to have no more secrets- she took a moment to mourn.

"Darkspawn!" a distant voice cried out, breaking Kallian from her pity party.

Her feet began to move before her mind caught up with where they were going. She sprinted from the door and down the hallway, running full speed to the main hall.

"Darkspawn!"

Varel stood tall at the front of the hall. Kallian felt a wave of guilt as she had pegged most responsibility upon him. Most of her company had already been in the hall, Alistair arriving moments after her. He sent a worried glance Kallian's way, before focusing at the problem at hand.

A short red headed woman stood before him, shaking uncontrollably as sobs rang out. "The horde heads for Amaranthine! You must hurry."

"They have a strong army, we will make haste, hopefully they will be able to hold them at bay until we arrive." Kallian cut in, stopped at the woman's side, placing a comforting hand upon her shoulder. "We will need to travel quickly, who will stay to guard the vigil?"

Kallian's eye's scanned her companions, "Nathaniel, this was your families home before it became the Wardens, I trust you will keep it in good hands. Velanna and Justice will stay to assist you."

Nathaniel bowed appreciatively, "No darkspawn shall see these halls again, Commander."

Kallian nodded with a smirk, "Very good, I will bring Alistair, Anders and Sigrun with me."

"I'm already dead- I've nothing to lose." Sigrun laughed in a chipper tone, nudging Anders in the ribs. "Ain't that right, Blondie?"

"Oh I do love a good suicide mission..." Anders returned with a pout, crossing his arms dramatically.

"The rest of us shall stay here," Varel paused, sending Kallian a grave look. "Maker protect you and hold you close, Commander." He nodded crossing his arms before his chest.

Kallian sighed, returning Alistair's worried glance, before heading off to the armory. "Maker watch over us..." She mumbled.


	27. I caught fire (REWIND)

**A/N: **_OKAY! so the deal here is, after the not getting a great response from the last chapter, and thoughts being that Kali and Alistair were moving a little to fast (Which I totally understood), I chose to rewrite it as to gauge what you guys think of it this way._ _I got the idea from Aristeia De Luca's story "Cancel me out", great story check it out. SO, the most helpful thing for you guys to do here, it to REVIEW, let me know which version you prefer. The lesser liked one will be removed for consistency sake. Thanks and enjoy!_

Kallian let the warmth of the water consume her every thought, peace surrounding her in an uncertain infinity. She sat perfectly positioned between Alistair's legs, her back leaning against his bare chest. The tub large enough to fit them both comfortably.

He trailed his fingers delicately along the length of her shoulder, treating her skin as he would fine china. This sent chills through her body and down to her spine- goosebumps erupting across her flesh. She smirked, feeling his lips following the path of his fingers, starting behind her ear moving downward to the crook of her neck. It was a futile effort to combat the bumps.

She shifted in the water, the combination of his touch mixed with the perfumed water sent her into sensory overload.

"What is it?" Alistair whispered into her ear, his teeth grazing along the lobe.

"I...I just never expecting to be back here, like this." Her voice was calm, relaxed as the words she had wanted to say for so long, slipped from her lips like honey. Kallian leaned her head back, nuzzling it between his shoulder and cheek.

He did not respond, just slid his hands beneath the water, bringing them to rest upon her ribs- just below her breasts. He spanned his fingers, pulling her tighter into him. Excitement pulsed through her as she felt the extent of his naked form against hers.

"Marry me..."

Kallian felt a new rush through her chest, a compilation of panic and excitement.

"Are you mad? Have you already forgotten I am already engaged to be married?" She asked pushing herself off of Alistair, she began to lift herself from the tub. "I told you to start wearing a helmet.."

"No, I am not mad, nor have I forgotten about the engagement that you have informed me shall be called off." Alistair chuckled, pulling her back into him.

The water splashed over the brim of the tub, she landed facing him this time, that stupid smirk she hated to love plastered on his face.

"It's not that simple," Kallian murmured.

"What do you mean it's not that simple? I had always imagined there would be a perfect time, or a perfect place to ask you this." His hand stopped at the nape of her neck, he locked his gaze upon hers. "But with us...with you, every moment is perfect, and where ever I am with you, is perfect. I cannot imagine spending another second without you, or another day without you as my wife."

"Alistair..." She sighed, pulling away from his grasp.

"What?"

Kallian bit her lower lip, avoiding his gaze as she reluctantly removed his hand from her neck. "This isn't something I can just answer like this, I need time..."

She lifted herself from the tub, swinging her feet on to the cold stone floor. The air in the room felt heavy, her breaths becoming more labored as she stood. The sheen of steam coating the thin windows retained most the rooms heat. She could hear him shifting out of the tub as she draped her robe across her shoulders, the goosebumps calming against the warm fabric. She did not know what was stopping her from saying yes, Fergus' words twisted through her thoughts- corrupting them. She turned and heading toward the door leading to her bed chambers.

"You need time?" Alistair finally called out, the pain in his words undeniable. Kallian stopped, licking her lips, searching for the best answer to satisfy him. "What does that mean? You need time to decide if you want to marry me, or if you want to call off your engagement to him?"

"Alistair..."

This time his name barely escaped at more than a whisper, the tightening in her chest quieting her further. How was this possible? Her back remained to him, though she could feel his eyes burning into the back of her head. Her heart was beating with excessive intensity, urging her to go forward and say yes, where as her head screamed for her to run. To get as far away as humanly possible.

She placed a delicate hand upon the doorknob, shuddering as the cool metal caressed her palm. A lump grew in her throat, as tears burned at the corners of her eyes. Here she stood with Alistair, the man she had loved with her entire heart for the past five years, even after he had deserted her. He was being perfect, doing everything she had hoped he would do, three years too late.

"What will you do?" Alistair asked, his voice noticeably closer.

"I don't know..." Kallian responded shaking her head as she opened the door and moved into her bed chamber. A fire crackled in the hearth, the dim gray afternoon sky had transitioned into the purple hue of dusk, the moon eager to break free from the clouds. How she envied that moon right now.

"You don't know?" Alistair repeated, following her into the room, as he wrapped a cloth around his waist. "We have returned to the uncertainty?"

"It's not that simple, Alistair."

"To the Void that! It has not even been a full day since you spoke of telling Teagan, what has changed?"

"I will inform him. But this is no longer as simple as it once was...there is much more at stake than just you and I." Her temper flared, as she finally turned toward him. "Have you ever had to end a relationship with someone who has an army at their disposal?"

"So you will just carry on? Go as if nothing has happened?"

"That is not what I am saying," She interjected, moving toward her closet and sifting through her house dresses. She settled upon a emerald green one, yanking the wooden hanger from the railing."Have you ever thought about this from my perspective? How hard it will be to tell Teagan, this will crush him..."

Alistair crossed the room, "So for the past fortnight, you have made love to me, and now you will return to him?"

"What do you mean?" She spun around, shrugging at him in exasperation.

"Do you want to end your engagement to him?"

"Alistair, of course I do." She sighed, rubbing her hand upon her forehead.

"Or do you just not want to marry me?"

Kallian paused for a minute, biting her lip again as she thumbed the velvety fabric between her fingers.

"You are not so quick to argue that point..." Alistair said in a low tone, his brow knitting as he processed this.

The silence between them was deafening, she couldn't bring herself to break it. Again her thoughts were brought back to when he had left. These memories haunted her for so long, the stone of the landsmeet hall etched permanently into her brain. The night was fully upon them now, the only light supplied came from the fire in the corner. A chill settled between them.

"It is not that." She finally admitted, her voice hushed.

"Then what?"

Kallian paused again, throwing the dress upon the bed, the lump growing in her throat prevented any words from making their way out. She placed her hands upon her forehead, soothing a headache that did not exist.

"Then what is it, Kallian?" Alistair snapped again, moving toward her.

"You broke my heart!" She cried out, tears escaping from the corners of her eyes, streaming freely down her face. "And as much as I do not want it to, it will take more than a few apologies and promises to heal such pain..."

It was now Alistair who was rendered speechless, he stood before her, a mere two steps away- hands outstretched to her.

**Knock Knock**

"Yes?" Kallian called out, her voice cracked against the tears.

"I am sorry to disturb you, Commander. I thought you would be interested to know Master Guerrin has arrived. He is speaking for a moment with the Teryn, and said he will meet you in the study." A recruits voice sounded through the door.

"I will be right there." She replied, wiping her face before she picked up her dress. "I have to go.."

"Kali-" Alistair started to reach toward her. "Please don't leave it like this, not now."

Kallian shied away from his touch, side stepping past him, "I have to go do this, please let me do it my way."

With that, she exited her bed chambers back into the bathroom, leaving a speechless Alistair in her wake.

0o0o0o0o0

"I'm sorry," Kallian repeated, lowering her gaze to the floor, she was unable to meet Teagan's glare. His complete look of sorrow. She could hear Teagan's sigh as he paced the room, his boots landing louder with each step. The fire crackled intensely in the hearth, illuminating every corner of the study in a red glow.

"You are sorry?" He asked sarcastically, malice clear in his tone. He gestured dramatically, running his fingers through his hair.

She kept her mouth shut, pursing her lips, hoping he could not tell she had been crying just moments before. She ran the ribbon from the waist of her dress through her fingers, attempting to match her breaths up with the landing of his boots steps.

"You see it is I who has become the fool in this scenario," Teagan continued, his pace quickening. "Many chastised me for allowing my betrothed such freedoms, but I always tried to be understanding of your lifestyle...because I love you."

"And I love you," Kallian jumped to her feet, stepping before his pacing, "That was never untrue, I do truly harbor feelings for you, Teagan. It's just..."

There was a long pause of silence between them, Kallian rolled on her heels, looking to Teagan to say something...anything. The darkness of the night consumed the grounds, Teagan looked exhausted, and her heart wrenched from her chest. She took a step toward him, his head hung lower now, not looking to her.

"I know..." he finally admitted, "Kallian, I have wished for nothing more than the Maker to grant me the love you have felt for him..."

Kallian was taken a back, her heart twisted further, she could handle him being angry- but for him to return with compassion was completely beyond her comprehension. His hand raised, gingerly caressing her cheek. "As much as I love you, I cannot force you to be with me."

"I love you, too" her voice cracked, tears threatening at the corners of her eyes again, burning to be released. "I wish I could be who you deserve."

Teagan wrapped his arms around her shoulders, pulling her into him, as she finally allowed a sob to ring out. They sat there for a moment, suspended in time.

Eventually Teagan pulled himself from her, placing a kiss upon her forehead, and without a word- exited the room.

Kallian was alone, she ran the back of her hand along her cheeks, wiping away the residue of her pain. Her chest contracted, the only sounds were that of the crackling fire and her ragged breaths.

"Darkspawn!" a distant voice cried out, breaking Kallian from her haze.

Her feet began to move before her mind caught up with where they were going. She sprinted from the door and down the hallway, running full speed to the main hall.

"Darkspawn!"

Varel stood tall at the front of the hall, arching a brow as Kallian entered. Her face must look a mess, splotchy red patches upon her cheeks, and her eyes still glazed over from the tears. She felt a wave of guilt as she looked at her second in command, as she had pegged most responsibility upon him. Most of her company had already been in the hall, Alistair arriving moments after her. He sent a worried glance Kallian's way, before focusing at the problem at hand.

A short red headed woman stood before him, shaking uncontrollably as sobs rang out. "The horde heads for Amaranthine! You must hurry."

"They have a strong army, we will make haste, hopefully they will be able to hold them at bay until we arrive." Kallian cut in, stopped at the woman's side, placing a comforting hand upon her shoulder. "We will need to travel quickly, who will stay to guard the vigil?"

Kallian's eye's scanned her companions, "Nathaniel, this was your families home before it became the Wardens, I trust you will keep it in good hands. Velanna and Justice will stay to assist you."

Nathaniel bowed appreciatively, "No darkspawn shall see these halls again, Commander."

Kallian nodded with a smirk, "Very good, I will bring Alistair, Anders and Sigrun with me."

"I'm already dead- I've nothing to lose." Sigrun laughed in a chipper tone, nudging Anders in the ribs. "Ain't that right, Blondie?"

"Oh I do love a good suicide mission..." Anders returned with a pout, crossing his arms dramatically.

"The rest of us shall stay here," Varel paused, sending Kallian a grave look. "Maker protect you and hold you close, Commander." He nodded crossing his arms before his chest.

Kallian sighed, returning Alistair's worried glance, before heading off to the armory. "Maker watch over me..." She mumbled.


	28. Nothing cleanses quite like fire

A/N: Still couldn't decide which version I preferred of the previous chapter, but I'm leaning toward the second draft. This chap is non partial, because Kallian and Alistair fight all the time and it's not odd. Enjoy!

The stench of smoke and death laced the air, attacking Kallian's nostrils as they approached Amaranthine. It began as a faint wisp through the breeze, though as the city came into view, it became the only apparent scent. Black towers of smoke billowed from behind the crumbling city walls, the red hue of flames filtering through the cracks in the stone.

Screams in the distance set her hairs on end, she quicken her pace around the bend, the entrance to the city finally in full view. Kallian broke into a sprint, weaving past the smoldering piles of bricks and the remains of what she assumed were the refugees.

The encampment sheared to pieces, the tents splattered with blood and other matter. An older woman crouched near a mangled lump of canvas, tears running down freely down her dirt riddled face. She cried silently as she cradled a wailing child, to young to understand what was happening around it, only that the sounds were frightening.

She could hear the clank of the armor of her companions behind her, steel-clad boots landing upon stone as they neared the remaining guards.

"Warden Commander," an older man called out, "Please, my family...they are in the city, you must save them!"

Kallian fell speechless, looking back and forth between the burning city and the completely beguiled man.

"Please, calm yourself sir while I address the Commander." the Captain of the Guard placed a delicate hand upon the mans shoulder, ushering him to the side. He turned and bowed toward her, "Warden-Commander, I am glad you have come, but I am afraid there is little that can be done."

"Were you in charge of Amaranthine's defenses?" Kallian stammered, moving her attention back toward the falling city in disbelief.

"I did what I could Warden-Commander, but believe me, there was little chance of success." The Captain sighed heavily, bowing his head in grievance. His head popped up, as if a memory hit in square in the face. "A couple of nights ago, a swarm of...of gruesome creatures emerged from beneath the city. They spread pestilence and destroyed everything they touched. And then at dawn...the other darkspawn attacked."

"We need men to mark the perimeter, is there-" Kallian started barking out orders moving toward the city, the Captain stepped forward, blocking her path.

"Commander, it is too late. Amaranthine is lost."

"Nonsense, it is not lost, the city still stands!" Kallian snapped back.

He shook his head, "The buildings may remain, but there will be few survivors after those creatures appeared. Their corruption is so virulent, a quarter of the city succumbed within the first day."

"Captain, get out of my way." Kallian commanded.

Gasps ran through the crowd, drawing her attention away from wanting to pummel the Captain from her path.

"Constable, a darkspawn approaches...alone." A guard called out, pushing past them.

Kallian's gaze shot down the path toward a figure moving through the smoke. Stumbling forward was indeed a single darkspawn, heavily armored, though unarmed.

"Archers, take him down." The captain directed, motioning his archers forward.

The darkspawn stopped short, holding its hands up in defeat. "Peace! Do not be killing! Only talk! Architect has a message, for Grey Wardens!"

Kallian motioned the archers back. "Let it speak."

It took initiative and moved forward, it's tone hasty. "The mothers army, it marches toward Vigils Keep. The Architect, he sends me to warn you. You must save the keep, and finish the mother at her lair."

"Why warn us?" Alistair called out from behind her, "Why betray your own kind?"

"The Architect wishes to gain the trust of the Grey Wardens, he does not wish for a mother to succeed."

"If we leave now, we can make it back to the keep before they arrive." The captain interjected.

"What of the darkspawn here?" Anders protested.

"Soon, they will march to Vigil's Keep as well. The Mother, she wants the keep destroyed...utterly." The darkspawn replied.

"This darkspawn has a point." The Guard Captain grunted. "The city has already been lost, I say we destroy it. Burn it, and all the darkspawn within."

"I cannot give up on this." Kallian grumbled, "I cannot abandon Amaranthine."

"Warden-Commander. Amaranthine is lost, we cannot afford to lose the keep as well."

Kallian bit her lip, looking past the Captain toward the hallowed shell that was once Amaranthine. The city had quieted, the roar of a Orge replacing the quieted screams. A building toppled with a sickly crash. Her stomach turned as she looked back upon the group. "So be it, destroy the city."

"You cannot seriously be considering this! Burning a city that has stood for a generation? Trade will collapse without Amaranthine!" Anders cried out, gesturing wildly toward the city, his brow furrowed heavily. This was the most serious Kallian had ever seen him. "This is wrong. And if there is even one innocent person in there...we can't just-"

"And you would leave the keep defenseless?" Kallian reminded him, "You would abandon our own people."

Anders remained silent for a moment, crossing his arms in objection. "You...you're right. Amaranthine is just...just a shell now. No one lives. The captain said so himself."

"Then Amaranthine will burn. Maker forgive us for what we must do." The captain nodded, moving toward his archers to spread the news.

Sigrun remained silent, her disapproval of this plan obvious, though she hid it well.

"The people of this city." Alistair started in a muted tone. "They are innocent and defenseless, Kallian. Blast it! I cannot make my peace with this."

"Do you think I am having fun? That this makes me feel good, Alistair?" Kallian growled, moving past him.

He hooked his hand around her bicep, "Maybe not. You are my leader, and I will follow what you say. But I will not lift a hand to help the militia burn innocent people to death."

Kallian pulled her arm from his grasp, helpless to avoid the tears that began to stream down her cheeks. What remained of the guard fell into formation, bows at the ready, awaiting instruction. The captain turned a questioning gaze toward her, waiting patiently with his subordinates.

"Alistair," Kallian whispered, "the best memories I have with my parents, come from this city. Fergus and I used to run the walls as children. Please, do not mistake my decision for lack of empathy...again."

Alistair opened his mouth to retort, but she had- had enough of this conversation. Making a futile attempt at wiping away the tears, she gestured for the captain to move forward.

The world went silent as he hollered instructions, the archers lowered their arrows into the flames, illuminating the heads in a brilliant orange-red hue. Her eyes again scanned the shambles that was once the great city of Amaranthine, sighting the darkspawn in the distance, tearing it apart. The arrows flew past them like shooting stars streaking the skies. Spreading destruction in their wake.

"Let us make way to the keep." She choked out, "Maker willing, we will make it there in time."

Kallian turned her back to the burning city, walking hurriedly down the path back toward the keep, unable to shake the pit in her stomach.


End file.
